Is there anything to be gained by coming out of the Aspie closet?

[suzannesidhe]

I do not tell anyone about being an Aspie as I believe that labels expose people to prejudice and preconceived ideas about personal capabilities and I am wondering if other people have found their lives have improved or become problematic as a result of  telling people.  I lack common sense and my boyfriend recently said "You think you're so intelligent but you're stupid". I wanted to respond by saying "actually I'm intelligent but I lack common sense", but I kept silent thinking instead that if he could be so rude and insulting, I should a) dump him and b) not for a moment consider trusting him with something so personal, especially as we live in a small super-gossipy town.  He is the second partner I have had say this to me and it is very hurtful.  I do not tell friends about being an Aspie, nor have told my university despite the fact I could get benefits in the form of flexible study routines and a disability scholarship.  I do not tell anyone and so people just accept me as weird and as I live in a small minded town, many assume I am on drugs and that is why I am not very successful in material terms or social relationship terms, when the real reason is that I have spent twenty odd years trying to grasp consequences and how to use them to my benefit and also trying to avoid stress and committing to actions that involve being in close contact with NT people.  NT people tend to see me negatively as weird, loose, or immaturely rebellious although curiously interesting due to being creative whereas spectrum folk and other non NTs tend to see me as a kind, understanding breath of fresh air.  Theoretically, I don't have a problem confiding to non-NTs about being Aspie, but I don't do it anyway as I just don't like labels.

I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences.

:+)   Suzi