HIJINKS
Oh man, did I forget to mention The Incident at Exec retreat? I did!
So, it's around 2-2:30 am, right? I'm on a ridiculously thin red couch attempting to fall asleep when I hear a crash and some mumbling outside the window followed by lots of flashlights. I couple of minutes later I hear some talking in the TV room where Kevin, Peggy Sue and Laura are still up. I decide there is a distinctly not-Kevin male voice and scramble until I find and put on my glasses, at which point Laura and Peggy Sue come to the door asking for me.
In a one person chair, I find Kevin alone and talking with a skinny and disorientated looking man. Apparently he had drunkenly stumbled in the front door and just sat/fell down on Kevin and started chatting (Oh, we are having said retreat in the Episcopal/Lutheran Student center, because one of our advisors is Chaplain, and we have no key to lock the front door). "If They find me, it will be cool. Just tell them I was looking for you." Kevin quickly wiggles his way away when I arrive and at some point I wind up alone in the room sitting catercornered to him.
He called me Sara. He asked me to come sit next to him in the largish and plush, yet still at best 1.5-person, seat. I gave him a confused "what?" and he responded with a "never mind, never mind." No problem.
Then he tells me his musical couch themed plans. Just so you know, I'm supposed to sit on that couch and he'll ("he" represents a mysterious new figure, not the drunk man) sit on that other couch, but if he tries to sit on my couch I need to run over to the drunk man's couch. Okay.
Shortly thereafter, I see the police outside the side door and I go let them in. Drunk Guy was trying very hard to be polite, but he kept accidentally calling the female cop "sir." He also apparently was driving a vehicle (have I mentioned his speech and walking skills aren't terribly advanced at this point?) and he didn't know who owned it.
Female Cop: "Do you have any ID?"
Drunk Man: "No, sir...No, ma'am...This is all I've got."
Female Cop: "I don't want your two dollars, sir."
Male Cop: "What is your name?"
Drunk Man: "John Hayward."
Male Cop: "Hayward?"
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
Male Cop: "H-A-Y-W-A-R-D?"
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
Police Radio: "John Raymond Hayward, 135 pounds, 5'7"..."
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
I learned how to set my new phone alarm and sat on one of the far couches while this was going. Everyone else was all awake and standing behind me at the edge of the room whispering. Tyler, with McGyver-like skill, secured the front door with his belt after the police had left.
So, it's around 2-2:30 am, right? I'm on a ridiculously thin red couch attempting to fall asleep when I hear a crash and some mumbling outside the window followed by lots of flashlights. I couple of minutes later I hear some talking in the TV room where Kevin, Peggy Sue and Laura are still up. I decide there is a distinctly not-Kevin male voice and scramble until I find and put on my glasses, at which point Laura and Peggy Sue come to the door asking for me.
In a one person chair, I find Kevin alone and talking with a skinny and disorientated looking man. Apparently he had drunkenly stumbled in the front door and just sat/fell down on Kevin and started chatting (Oh, we are having said retreat in the Episcopal/Lutheran Student center, because one of our advisors is Chaplain, and we have no key to lock the front door). "If They find me, it will be cool. Just tell them I was looking for you." Kevin quickly wiggles his way away when I arrive and at some point I wind up alone in the room sitting catercornered to him.
He called me Sara. He asked me to come sit next to him in the largish and plush, yet still at best 1.5-person, seat. I gave him a confused "what?" and he responded with a "never mind, never mind." No problem.
Then he tells me his musical couch themed plans. Just so you know, I'm supposed to sit on that couch and he'll ("he" represents a mysterious new figure, not the drunk man) sit on that other couch, but if he tries to sit on my couch I need to run over to the drunk man's couch. Okay.
Shortly thereafter, I see the police outside the side door and I go let them in. Drunk Guy was trying very hard to be polite, but he kept accidentally calling the female cop "sir." He also apparently was driving a vehicle (have I mentioned his speech and walking skills aren't terribly advanced at this point?) and he didn't know who owned it.
Female Cop: "Do you have any ID?"
Drunk Man: "No, sir...No, ma'am...This is all I've got."
Female Cop: "I don't want your two dollars, sir."
Male Cop: "What is your name?"
Drunk Man: "John Hayward."
Male Cop: "Hayward?"
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
Male Cop: "H-A-Y-W-A-R-D?"
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
Police Radio: "John Raymond Hayward, 135 pounds, 5'7"..."
Drunk Man: "Yes, sir."
I learned how to set my new phone alarm and sat on one of the far couches while this was going. Everyone else was all awake and standing behind me at the edge of the room whispering. Tyler, with McGyver-like skill, secured the front door with his belt after the police had left.