sddghadsfsfd
It feels like everything’s spinning out of control
like I’ve lost my grip on the reigns. Right now all I really want to do is bring it to a whiplash-inducing, grinding halt. But where’s the brake pedal?
It feels like everything just makes it spin faster and more out of control. Like the famous car scene in “fight club,” right now I just want to let go and just let be what will be. School is a drain.. I am paying way too much to sit through hour after hour of droning, mundane lecture, pertaining to things that I already know or are of no relevance to me.
But society says I must. I must pay my money to get force fed figures that I will later regurgitate for a test, and immediately thereafter forget, only so I can get my little piece of paper that says I am special and erudite enough to deserve a job. The job that I will someday learn to either loathe, or will lose; so I can afford trinkets which are of no value, and which I can’t afford.
Remember when we had dreams?
wishes?
ambitions?
I wish I could. I always wanted to be a paleontologist when I was little. I wonder what happened to those days… If only we could go back to that youthful indifference.
Every day is full of the rollercoaster ride of emotion and cognition. I have gotten good at hiding it and lying. It’s all so draining.
I’m addicted to sleeping pills
I’m lonely
I’m unhappy
and I’m afraid that time is running out
like I’ve lost my grip on the reigns. Right now all I really want to do is bring it to a whiplash-inducing, grinding halt. But where’s the brake pedal?
It feels like everything just makes it spin faster and more out of control. Like the famous car scene in “fight club,” right now I just want to let go and just let be what will be. School is a drain.. I am paying way too much to sit through hour after hour of droning, mundane lecture, pertaining to things that I already know or are of no relevance to me.
But society says I must. I must pay my money to get force fed figures that I will later regurgitate for a test, and immediately thereafter forget, only so I can get my little piece of paper that says I am special and erudite enough to deserve a job. The job that I will someday learn to either loathe, or will lose; so I can afford trinkets which are of no value, and which I can’t afford.
Remember when we had dreams?
wishes?
ambitions?
I wish I could. I always wanted to be a paleontologist when I was little. I wonder what happened to those days… If only we could go back to that youthful indifference.
Every day is full of the rollercoaster ride of emotion and cognition. I have gotten good at hiding it and lying. It’s all so draining.
I’m addicted to sleeping pills
I’m lonely
I’m unhappy
and I’m afraid that time is running out