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[damnsonyouhigh]

Would you date a bisexual person? Why or why not?

I used to think this was a straight person thing, but lately I've been noticing that a lot of gays (and even some bisexuals themselves) have issues with dating bisexual people.

Personally, I'd feel too out of my comfort zone to handle it well.

Comments

[tin_foil_hat]

Yeah, there's a lot of mono-sexual prejudice against bisexuals.

I don't get it. Why would it put you out of your comfort zone?

[damnsonyouhigh]

I used to not have a problem with it, because I never bothered to think about it, but one day I was talking to a friend about the topic, and all of a sudden I imagined a scenario where I was sitting next to my bisexual boyfriend and then seeing a hot guy walk into the room. I imagined myself checking him out and then noticing my boyfriend checking the dude out too. It just struck me as bizarre, because I've only ever checked out guys with my female friends or gay guy friends. Ever since then the feeling just stuck with me.

[tin_foil_hat]

See, I don't understand that. If you're in a relationship where noone is allowed to check anyone else out then it doesn't matter, and if you do both check the same person out, isn't that more even and fair, so you should feel less uncomfortable and insecure in the relationship?

[damnsonyouhigh]

Well, I think most people would agree that they'd like to have partners that don't check anybody out. But we all know we do it when we see a really good-looking person. In romantic relationships, I'm just used to the whole "opposites attract" thing, so I'm only equipped with knowledge of how straight men are. I know us girls have lots of differences in romance than men. I have no idea what bisexual men's ideas/ways of thinking in the romance/relationship department are like.

[tin_foil_hat]

I think perhaps your issue is considering people in groups rather than individuals. Everyone's idea of romance and relationship is different.

[amadteaparty]

Well, I think most people would agree that they'd like to have partners that don't check anybody out.

Really?!

[thedastardfunk]

That surprised me too. Even though we are monogamous, my BF and I will talk all night about people we think are hot.

[amadteaparty]

Seriously! I mean, I'm not DYING for my husband to check out other people, but it's normal and harmless and pretty much everyone does it. I like looking at good-looking men, even though I'm happy with the one I have!

(BTW, have you seen Reece since I gave you that advice a month or so ago?)

[thedastardfunk]

lol, not yet! I see him this weekend, but I'll have just had my tonsils removed :(

[amadteaparty]

Awwwww. Well, the next next time, then.

(BTW, I just woke up, so when I first read this my brain saw "toenails" instead of tonsils. I was like, "What?!"

[thedastardfunk]

LOL, toenails

[nextdrinksonme]

Count me in as surprised as well. The boy and I go so far as to point out actors or people we know IRL that the other would "love". He constantly comes home and tells me about some super awkward client he had that I would find dreamy, ha.

[damnsonyouhigh]

Um, yes. I've never ever heard of anyone being pleased by having their partner checking someone else out. It might not be an automatic deal breaker, but it is annoying. Someone not caring about their partner checking someone else out is to me a sign that they're not really that attached to their partner at all.

[amadteaparty]

Lol, I'm sorry, I normally try to respond in a mature, polite manner, but I don't even know how to respond to this!

As I said to Margie, I'm not DYING for my husband to check out other people, but I don't care in the least if he does. Why should I care if he looks at someone else? Perhaps he's thinking how much hotter his wife is?! In any case, I'm the one he's coming home to. It's nice that he can appreciate beauty, and I'm not deluded enough to think I'm the most gorgeous woman in the world. But out of all the women in the world, I'm the one he chooses to share his life with.

And honestly, it's normal and natural to look at other people. Just because I look at another attractive man doesn't mean I'm going to cheat on my husband, or love him any less.

[nextdrinksonme]

Well now you have. I like the fact that my boy doesn't feel that I control his eyes and libido and he's allowed to OMG look at another woman and find her attractive. Thinking someone's attractive and being attracted TO them are two different things. Someone caring about their partner checking someone else out is to me a sign that they're not really that secure in their relationship at all.

[amadteaparty]

I definitely ditto your last sentence!

BTW, to the original noter, my relationship has been going strong for almost 10 years now, despite the fact that I don't mind if he looks at other women, and vice versa.