Captain Jack's Holiday Mail Bag!

[ask_captainjack]

TWO GREAT PIECES OF HOLIDAY ADVICE IN MY MAIL BAG FOR YOU!

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Dear Captain Jack:

What is Christmas like in the future? Do you get presents?

- PrincessPea

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Comments

[oh_doask]

I CAN GIVE YOU NUMBER 5 ON YOUR LIST!

COME AND CHECK!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

YOU DO NOT HAVE MY COCK, JOHN HART.

I have it. IT'S STILL ATTACHED.

[oh_doask]

HAVE YOU CHECKED LATELY?!

HAVE YOU?!

I LOL HARD!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

That's not funny!

I know it's still attached because the bow is chafing.

[oh_doask]

ONE WORD!

SENSEPLANT!

THINK ABOUT THAT!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

...don't make me use wikipedia, Hart. They tax it now!

[ask_captainjack]

I checked Ianto's. It's fine!

If you're trying to wrap ribbons around something I suggest Martha's eyes. That way she doesn't have to see what you carved into your chest as a Grimmas "tattoo".

[gwen_e_cooper]

I thought that was put on with Sharpie!

That's... permanent? :O

[oh_doask]

IT'S GRIMACE CLAUS!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Oh my god.

[ask_captainjack]

Now you see why it's hard to sleep tucked up in your pod on Grimmas Eve?

Back in Boe we'd take turns sitting up awake with a blaster!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

If Hart gets too close can I blast him?

Or would that spoil Grimmas?

[ask_captainjack]

Depends on if you blast him on carpet or tile.

I know how you get about stains on carpet!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Right. If he goes in the kitchen, it's blasting time. Rhys gets very particular about the piggin not being picked at ahead of time!

[ask_janet]

this looks like my last boyfriend.

he tasted like intestinal blockage and red dye number five.