Comments | ask_arealdoctor: The Earth is protected by a beagle

ask_arealdoctor

The Earth is protected by a beagle

Apr 13, 2009 10:37

Torchwood is what stands between Earth and alien threat? We're doomed ( Read more... )

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bone_lady April 14 2009, 00:43:27 UTC

Martha, I will pay big money or exchange research data if you stick John and Jack with lidocaine...srsly...and take pictures. Of course Jack will say he'll look sexy regardless, which is probably true, but still....

ask_arealdoctor April 14 2009, 15:39:26 UTC

Usually I'd be more than happy to share research data in any case, but I don't think I'm allowed to anymore. National Secrets, you know. Besides, it wouldn't do you much good if I gave you any data because I'd just have to Retcon you after.

bone_lady April 15 2009, 03:38:59 UTC

No...no..I don't want retcon. I hear nausea is a side effect. I'll pass.

I was going to share *my* research data with you :). I've an arsenal of tertiary skeletal syphilis here that defies explanation.

ask_aboutcoffee April 15 2009, 04:09:12 UTC

I was going to say "I've had all the syphilis I want in this lifetime" but that sounds bad. I've never had syphilis (MARTHA, PLEASE NOTE).

But we did have to deal with an alien who caught it once. That was un-fun.

ask_captainjack April 15 2009, 04:16:50 UTC

Hey Martha, are you going to score our results??? With me being the standard of PERFECT, obviously. I'm just wondering what percentage of Ianto's blood is coffee and what percentage of Rhys' is bacon fat.

ask_aboutcoffee April 15 2009, 04:27:04 UTC

Pure espresso runs in these veins. Why do you think I have such a high alcohol tolerance/heart rate?

ask_captainjack April 15 2009, 04:28:48 UTC

I just figured your heart beats faster when I'm in the room!

ask_aboutcoffee April 15 2009, 04:30:21 UTC

It definitely does if you're in the room because I'm bringing us coffee.

ask_arealdoctor April 15 2009, 14:10:09 UTC

As a matter of fact, sweetie, it does. You do have far too much caffeine in your bloodstream and your heart rate is a tad rapid. I don't want you to start having heart palpitations or develop an ulcer. I'm not your mummy and I'm not going to push, but if you'd like to talk about it I have a couple of suggestions.

ask_aboutcoffee April 15 2009, 14:17:21 UTC

Suggestions like "don't drink so much coffee"? Because I've been down that road with Gwen. She tried to swap me to half-caf and I got...edgy.

ask_arealdoctor April 15 2009, 14:28:16 UTC

Substituting one cup of half-caf a day won't hurt to start. I'm not an ogre and I don't expect miracles. :)

ask_aboutcoffee April 15 2009, 15:16:56 UTC

Maybe.

Only on days where we don't have call-outs. I have to be at the top of my form!

dru_evilista April 17 2009, 22:31:02 UTC

Do not try to get between Torchwood and their coffee. They will cut you. Seriously. They will. You underestimate how much they all love their coffee.(Owen once offered to have Ianto's babies in exchange for coffee) And Ianto is their Coffee King.

Caffeine is Life. It's what keeps you going, make you warm, makes you hard, makes you other then dead. Of COURSE they're addicted to caffeine!

*lovingly strokes mug of coffee...throws in a energy drink on top*

ask_arealdoctor April 15 2009, 14:04:57 UTC

Patient information is confidential, Jack.

You wouldn't want anyone to know about that back-up uterus you have, now do you?

oh_doask April 15 2009, 14:08:15 UTC

SHIT he said he'd had that taken out after that one time!

I WOULD HAVE HAD A 2ND WITH YOU, JACK!

How much of my blood is sexy-b0, Martha?

ask_arealdoctor April 15 2009, 14:12:48 UTC

I don't think I want to know what sexy-b0 is.

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