To Dream of Dying
To Dream of Dying
She dreamt she was flying. Then she dreamt she was dying. She leapt out of bed with a gasp, tossing covers aside as bare feet pounded to the window, thrusting it open and angling face into the wind. Cold alien breeze cooled the sweat on her skin, dried away the tears. Deep gulps of soothing fresh night air calmed her, relaxed her shoulders.
“Rose?”
The Doctor was stood in the doorway, leaning, arms crossed, brow knitted into a worried frown, shoulder holding up the door frame.
“Are you ok?”
Turning, Rose pulled a smile from her toes, one that didn’t quite reach her eyes she knew.
“I’m fine. I just had a bad dream.”
“It’s just a dream Rose.” He stepped forward, chocolate brown eyes wide and kind. A small smile touching his lips, long fingers reaching out to gently brush her shoulder.
“I died. I dreamt I died.” She laughed nervously, “I guess I was checking I was still here you know?”
He nodded, stepping closer still. She could feel the warmth radiate from him.
“I don’t want to die Doctor.” Her voice came out tiny, frightened, and wavering slightly.
“Oh Rose, don’t leave me please don’t leave me.”
She didn’t think she had seen him quite so sad, quite so alone. Hands suddenly thrust into pinstriped pockets, a barrier to protect himself from the pain.
“Don’t be daft.” She smiled, “I could never leave. I just don’t…” she wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him into an embrace. His hands were instantly around her back, stroking her spine. His arms always felt safe, comforting, a harbour in any storm.
“Why don’t you ever… make the most of it? I can’t stay forever.”
“I do.”
“You don’t.”
“I…” his voice cracked. Pulling her closer, his face buried in her hair, nuzzling into her shoulder. She couldn’t see his face but she could imagine the pain, the sorrow.”
“I don’t think I could bare to lose you if I did.”
And there it was. The truth. She sighed, closing her eyes against the tears, revelling in safety of his arms. No more words were spoken that night. There was no need.
She dreamt she was flying. Then she dreamt she was dying. She leapt out of bed with a gasp, tossing covers aside as bare feet pounded to the window, thrusting it open and angling face into the wind. Cold alien breeze cooled the sweat on her skin, dried away the tears. Deep gulps of soothing fresh night air calmed her, relaxed her shoulders.
“Rose?”
The Doctor was stood in the doorway, leaning, arms crossed, brow knitted into a worried frown, shoulder holding up the door frame.
“Are you ok?”
Turning, Rose pulled a smile from her toes, one that didn’t quite reach her eyes she knew.
“I’m fine. I just had a bad dream.”
“It’s just a dream Rose.” He stepped forward, chocolate brown eyes wide and kind. A small smile touching his lips, long fingers reaching out to gently brush her shoulder.
“I died. I dreamt I died.” She laughed nervously, “I guess I was checking I was still here you know?”
He nodded, stepping closer still. She could feel the warmth radiate from him.
“I don’t want to die Doctor.” Her voice came out tiny, frightened, and wavering slightly.
“Oh Rose, don’t leave me please don’t leave me.”
She didn’t think she had seen him quite so sad, quite so alone. Hands suddenly thrust into pinstriped pockets, a barrier to protect himself from the pain.
“Don’t be daft.” She smiled, “I could never leave. I just don’t…” she wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him into an embrace. His hands were instantly around her back, stroking her spine. His arms always felt safe, comforting, a harbour in any storm.
“Why don’t you ever… make the most of it? I can’t stay forever.”
“I do.”
“You don’t.”
“I…” his voice cracked. Pulling her closer, his face buried in her hair, nuzzling into her shoulder. She couldn’t see his face but she could imagine the pain, the sorrow.”
“I don’t think I could bare to lose you if I did.”
And there it was. The truth. She sighed, closing her eyes against the tears, revelling in safety of his arms. No more words were spoken that night. There was no need.