(no subject)
I feel lately, like I'm reliving a lot of my most regretted mistakes. Well, not exactly reliving, but more like... I'm being made to recall them an awful lot.
I dream, every night, that James and I have broken up. Usually it's over really stupid things... (ex: James: "You lied to me! You said your mom made you buy all of those clothes!!" ...or my favorite: James: "Ahhh! You just sneezed really loudly into the phone! It's over!")
But, for some reason, I wake up on the edge of tears, feeling like I did after James and I broke up last year. Waking up feeling horrible and like you've lost everything is not a good way to start the day, mind you.
But then I get to school and see the kid, and everything is okay. :D
Today, though... my dad woke me up from my nap and said that one of my cousins slit her wrists and took a bunch of pills. I don't think it was in that order, though. :P And no, she's no one that you know, she's on another side of the family. She didn't die or anything... but I remember looking at the scars on my wrists and everything from last year just flooding over me. I was reliving that horrid day... August 22... all over again in my head. If I were closer to her, I would go and talk to her.
My mom's best friend is also having some trouble... that I won't talk about, but it's still bugging me. It's nothing of my mom's best friend's fault... that poor lady!
Bleh. I hope James calls soon.
I dream, every night, that James and I have broken up. Usually it's over really stupid things... (ex: James: "You lied to me! You said your mom made you buy all of those clothes!!" ...or my favorite: James: "Ahhh! You just sneezed really loudly into the phone! It's over!")
But, for some reason, I wake up on the edge of tears, feeling like I did after James and I broke up last year. Waking up feeling horrible and like you've lost everything is not a good way to start the day, mind you.
But then I get to school and see the kid, and everything is okay. :D
Today, though... my dad woke me up from my nap and said that one of my cousins slit her wrists and took a bunch of pills. I don't think it was in that order, though. :P And no, she's no one that you know, she's on another side of the family. She didn't die or anything... but I remember looking at the scars on my wrists and everything from last year just flooding over me. I was reliving that horrid day... August 22... all over again in my head. If I were closer to her, I would go and talk to her.
My mom's best friend is also having some trouble... that I won't talk about, but it's still bugging me. It's nothing of my mom's best friend's fault... that poor lady!
Bleh. I hope James calls soon.