(no subject)
So I have my first Art History exam tomorrow. You know, the class that I've missed so often that I'm one absence away from automatic failure? The class that, when I do go, I'm in my own world or asleep the entire time? The class that I have one page of notes for? Yeah, that one. I'm freaking out. Brian told me he'd stay up with me all night and help me out. Or stay up all night if I needed him.
Only, now that I really want to get in touch with him, I can't. I'm sure he fell asleep. I can't be mad about it... it's late. He has class in the morning too. It's only right that he goes to sleep! So I'm not mad... but I'm sad. I really could have used his support right now. I'm a stressed mess and not getting anything done. I'm considering just going to bed and resigning to my failure. But that's just not me- I don't FAIL in academics. I just DON'T- so I'm torn. I'm tired, frustrated, hopeless.... but I can't fail...
God, I don't see how he can think I'm so fucking smart. What does he see that I don't? I wonder if it's that he sees something that I can't see or just that he sees something that doesn't really exist? After all, when you love somebody, you create an image of them that may or may not be them in reality. Maybe he loves me because he thinks I'm someone completely different.
>.o
Sorry.
Just stressed.
Bed is looking so fucking good...
I think I'll memorize these slides, then pass out. and pray I wake up on time for my exam.
Only, now that I really want to get in touch with him, I can't. I'm sure he fell asleep. I can't be mad about it... it's late. He has class in the morning too. It's only right that he goes to sleep! So I'm not mad... but I'm sad. I really could have used his support right now. I'm a stressed mess and not getting anything done. I'm considering just going to bed and resigning to my failure. But that's just not me- I don't FAIL in academics. I just DON'T- so I'm torn. I'm tired, frustrated, hopeless.... but I can't fail...
God, I don't see how he can think I'm so fucking smart. What does he see that I don't? I wonder if it's that he sees something that I can't see or just that he sees something that doesn't really exist? After all, when you love somebody, you create an image of them that may or may not be them in reality. Maybe he loves me because he thinks I'm someone completely different.
>.o
Sorry.
Just stressed.
Bed is looking so fucking good...
I think I'll memorize these slides, then pass out. and pray I wake up on time for my exam.