(no subject)
I'm frustrated.
School is going really well and poorly, both at the same time. I'm doing fine with the material and I'm consistently scoring well on the exams, but I'm committing 70+ hours per week to studying. I can't even count the number of family and social events that I've missed since school started. I think I cry every Saturday night. I guess I'm used to having balance in my life and now I have none. The adjustment to being a medical student has been more difficult than I expected.
Part of the problem is that we have exams almost every Monday. This means I spend all weekend studying and have Monday nights off. Except they're not really "off." We have class at 8am on Tuesday and I always have the first lab section after class on Tuesday, so I have to prepare for the lab on Monday night or risk wasting 2 hrs in lab the next day.
I'm just not the kind of person that understands everything the first time I see it. A group of my friends were talking about going out tonight and it really got me down. They don't need to study because they already understand everything we covered today and they've already done the pre-lab work for tomorrow. The fact that they learn more quickly than me isn't what bothers me; it's that they have time to live life. I feel like I'm missing out on life. Like I literally just vanished from my life.
I apologize for the totally depressing post. There have been good moments. I am making friends and I've made it to a couple of parties since school started, but today just sucks.
School is going really well and poorly, both at the same time. I'm doing fine with the material and I'm consistently scoring well on the exams, but I'm committing 70+ hours per week to studying. I can't even count the number of family and social events that I've missed since school started. I think I cry every Saturday night. I guess I'm used to having balance in my life and now I have none. The adjustment to being a medical student has been more difficult than I expected.
Part of the problem is that we have exams almost every Monday. This means I spend all weekend studying and have Monday nights off. Except they're not really "off." We have class at 8am on Tuesday and I always have the first lab section after class on Tuesday, so I have to prepare for the lab on Monday night or risk wasting 2 hrs in lab the next day.
I'm just not the kind of person that understands everything the first time I see it. A group of my friends were talking about going out tonight and it really got me down. They don't need to study because they already understand everything we covered today and they've already done the pre-lab work for tomorrow. The fact that they learn more quickly than me isn't what bothers me; it's that they have time to live life. I feel like I'm missing out on life. Like I literally just vanished from my life.
I apologize for the totally depressing post. There have been good moments. I am making friends and I've made it to a couple of parties since school started, but today just sucks.