i NEVER gave up
I never gave up on you. I assumed you gave up on me. I was hoping you didn’t although I have to say that if I were in your position I would have. I’ve given up on myself and the only thing I can say in my own defense is that I love him. I love him Kristey. I can’t help it. As much as I want to deny it and re-assuring myself that I don’t have feelings anymore, I DO.. It’s Impossible for me not to believe what he tells me.
“I know its nothing but lies but they sound so sincere”
I don’t know what else to say. When you called me last night and left me that message I didn’t get it until 6:30am my time. It made me cry and I’m so sorry that I made you sick. Don’t worry about me. I’m hoping this time I can take care of myself. This time I know what I’m getting myself into and I can assure you right now that this time if things get screwed up it will be no ones fault but mine. And you won’t have to listen to my cry or complain about it anymore. Ty brought up a good point last night and it was a very rude awakening. What he said was something to the effect of how stupid I’ am. I realize that. But you told me when this first started that “if you LOVE something let it go” well I let it go and it came back. Now things have been better within this last week then they ever were in the previous 8 MONTHS. I know that after all the shit we said about one another we should absolutely Hate each other but neither one of us can do it. My head is telling me that I’m stupid and not to believe any of it and my heart is telling me that all that matters is me and him. Everything that’s gone on in the past doesn’t matter anymore. This is a fresh start. A new beginning. This time I want to follow my heart. you also told me “love in your heart will conquer all.” That’s the way I’m seeing things right now. You think I don’t know what EVERYONE that I’ve complained to is saying about me? I can tell by the way people look at me when I’m with him. But he truly makes me happy. As of right now, I’ am HAPPY Kristey. I know that my happiness shouldn’t depend on him and it doesn’t. And without you I would die also. But I’ve thought out this situation long and hard and this is how I want my life to be for now, regardless of what people say or think about me. I know this is probably hard for you to comprehend because you are SOOO much stronger than me and you always know that when something's ending there's always a brighter beginning. Well, I tried that. Other than Him you were the only other thing in my life that kept me happy. Everything else was just to pass the time and no one else made me happy like you and him have. I thank you so much for everything. You have been there for me through it ALL.. You’ve been my rock of strength throughout this whole ordeal. Without you I’d definitely have to say that I think I’d be dead. You never knew this but, when I was really sick your the only thing that kept me together, made me snap out of it, and made me realize a lot about life. I LOVE YOU KRISTEY. and no matter what I will ALWAYS be here for you.
“I know its nothing but lies but they sound so sincere”
I don’t know what else to say. When you called me last night and left me that message I didn’t get it until 6:30am my time. It made me cry and I’m so sorry that I made you sick. Don’t worry about me. I’m hoping this time I can take care of myself. This time I know what I’m getting myself into and I can assure you right now that this time if things get screwed up it will be no ones fault but mine. And you won’t have to listen to my cry or complain about it anymore. Ty brought up a good point last night and it was a very rude awakening. What he said was something to the effect of how stupid I’ am. I realize that. But you told me when this first started that “if you LOVE something let it go” well I let it go and it came back. Now things have been better within this last week then they ever were in the previous 8 MONTHS. I know that after all the shit we said about one another we should absolutely Hate each other but neither one of us can do it. My head is telling me that I’m stupid and not to believe any of it and my heart is telling me that all that matters is me and him. Everything that’s gone on in the past doesn’t matter anymore. This is a fresh start. A new beginning. This time I want to follow my heart. you also told me “love in your heart will conquer all.” That’s the way I’m seeing things right now. You think I don’t know what EVERYONE that I’ve complained to is saying about me? I can tell by the way people look at me when I’m with him. But he truly makes me happy. As of right now, I’ am HAPPY Kristey. I know that my happiness shouldn’t depend on him and it doesn’t. And without you I would die also. But I’ve thought out this situation long and hard and this is how I want my life to be for now, regardless of what people say or think about me. I know this is probably hard for you to comprehend because you are SOOO much stronger than me and you always know that when something's ending there's always a brighter beginning. Well, I tried that. Other than Him you were the only other thing in my life that kept me happy. Everything else was just to pass the time and no one else made me happy like you and him have. I thank you so much for everything. You have been there for me through it ALL.. You’ve been my rock of strength throughout this whole ordeal. Without you I’d definitely have to say that I think I’d be dead. You never knew this but, when I was really sick your the only thing that kept me together, made me snap out of it, and made me realize a lot about life. I LOVE YOU KRISTEY. and no matter what I will ALWAYS be here for you.