Running on empty
I guess I had been denying it for a long time, pretending that it wasn't true and believing that maybe if I tried hard enough I could be what they wanted me to be. I don't know why she doesn't really love me, sometimes I think she sees him when she looks at me, or maybe she sees what he did to me and that makes her feel guilty.
I've been avoiding going home, but in the end that's really the only place I can go. I wonder sometimes if it's possible for someone to love me, even when the people who are supposed to love me the most, don't. When I am here, I stay in my bedroom and out of the way. I figure if she doesn't see me, she'll forget all about me and I'll be ok.
I guess that's why I stopped eating again. I just want to dissappear because I think I've run out of options. I don't see a way out. Maybe if I stay in here long enough I'll just fade away.
I've been avoiding going home, but in the end that's really the only place I can go. I wonder sometimes if it's possible for someone to love me, even when the people who are supposed to love me the most, don't. When I am here, I stay in my bedroom and out of the way. I figure if she doesn't see me, she'll forget all about me and I'll be ok.
I guess that's why I stopped eating again. I just want to dissappear because I think I've run out of options. I don't see a way out. Maybe if I stay in here long enough I'll just fade away.