"Army, Unit, Family"
This weekend was okay, I had fun but when I think back all I feel is saddness...friday was another 14 hour day...i always complain about them but they really aren't that bad. i could have it worse. This friday was terrible though, got home from job #1 and steve told me the date of homecoming had changed to 2 days before the original date. I fell apart, not only do i have to change the flight but now im gonna have to take off more work that i cant afford. I get to the mall parking lot and just break down. If anyone saw me in my car crying..they probably thought i was nuts. but I had to put on a smile and go into work for another 4 hours. I get into work, tell my manager what happened and the waterworks start all over again. She hugs me and tells me it'll be okay and I compose myself and go out onto the floor and end up doing bomb in sales...which is good I guess thats somewhat of a moral booster. I was supposed to go see New Moon with co-workers, but after the night I had..it just was not happening. So i go home, get some stuff and head to Debbies to write xmas cards and be in the presence of someone who somewhat knows what I'm going through.
Saturday morning, we went to the Operation Troop Support gift wrapping. I'm supporting the soliders NOT the Army. I just have to keep telling myself that. Saw soldiers there, and thank them, like I do to all Military personell...the first thank you was okay, but the second wasn't as easy. He looked into my eyes after I said thank you and it just tore my heart up. I can see the pain in his eyes that I saw in steves back in september, and its funny how i can relate to a stranger like I did with him. I wanted nothing more than to hug him and cry with him and for him...but I know soldiers dont like to show emotion unless its to their mom and gfs and im obv none of the above. After gift wrapping we went to drop my car off at the god forsaken Meineke and I wont even go on a rant about that place cuz you'll be asleep by the time your done. Did some retail therapy and then proceeded to pick up my car and get into a very profane and verbal fight with the manager at Meineke. Went to Moms to play cards, and laughed for almost 6 hours. As crazy as my family is, I love them. I dont know what I'll do without them when I move. *sigh*
Sunday started off the same way friday night did...ANOTHER date change, this time for a completely different week, which of course means more expensive plane tickets. Which means more stress, which leads to me loathing the army even more. We did more packing. It tears my heart up packing my stuff, because I love moving...but the fact that instead of moving with my family, I'm moving half a country away from them. as well as boston, and two of my best friends. Debbie I may come move to NC when Steve goes to Afghanistan because I'd rather go through a deployment with you than anyone else. I think we have an understanding of each other better than people I've been friends with for 10+ years. You dont find a friendship like that often..like my relationship with steve, I have the army to thank. *sigh* oh the army. ANYWAYS! we headed to IHOP and plaster fun time later on Sunday. and i was home by 5. curled up in my bed and proceeded to cry and watch movies and cry some more. Oh the life i lead lol.
This week should be interesting. after little to no sleep last night I found myself contemplating calling out today and then kept thinking "save the time for texas, save the time for texas" got my body out of bed, and here I am at work...with my mind still at home in bed.
Please let this week fly by, please let this week fly by! I used to be such a positive person, I wish i knew what happened to her :(
Saturday morning, we went to the Operation Troop Support gift wrapping. I'm supporting the soliders NOT the Army. I just have to keep telling myself that. Saw soldiers there, and thank them, like I do to all Military personell...the first thank you was okay, but the second wasn't as easy. He looked into my eyes after I said thank you and it just tore my heart up. I can see the pain in his eyes that I saw in steves back in september, and its funny how i can relate to a stranger like I did with him. I wanted nothing more than to hug him and cry with him and for him...but I know soldiers dont like to show emotion unless its to their mom and gfs and im obv none of the above. After gift wrapping we went to drop my car off at the god forsaken Meineke and I wont even go on a rant about that place cuz you'll be asleep by the time your done. Did some retail therapy and then proceeded to pick up my car and get into a very profane and verbal fight with the manager at Meineke. Went to Moms to play cards, and laughed for almost 6 hours. As crazy as my family is, I love them. I dont know what I'll do without them when I move. *sigh*
Sunday started off the same way friday night did...ANOTHER date change, this time for a completely different week, which of course means more expensive plane tickets. Which means more stress, which leads to me loathing the army even more. We did more packing. It tears my heart up packing my stuff, because I love moving...but the fact that instead of moving with my family, I'm moving half a country away from them. as well as boston, and two of my best friends. Debbie I may come move to NC when Steve goes to Afghanistan because I'd rather go through a deployment with you than anyone else. I think we have an understanding of each other better than people I've been friends with for 10+ years. You dont find a friendship like that often..like my relationship with steve, I have the army to thank. *sigh* oh the army. ANYWAYS! we headed to IHOP and plaster fun time later on Sunday. and i was home by 5. curled up in my bed and proceeded to cry and watch movies and cry some more. Oh the life i lead lol.
This week should be interesting. after little to no sleep last night I found myself contemplating calling out today and then kept thinking "save the time for texas, save the time for texas" got my body out of bed, and here I am at work...with my mind still at home in bed.
Please let this week fly by, please let this week fly by! I used to be such a positive person, I wish i knew what happened to her :(