(no subject)
I know this is fucking random and weird of me.. but man. I miss Brett. We haven't talked since January. Unless you include the times I was drunk and tried calling him.. but his phone is usually disconnected. Thank god I am never that wasted during Colorbomb's work day. That would be a mess. Although usually when I call Trevor would have these long conversations with me. It probably wouldn't matter. Okay that makes no sense. Bla. I miss San Diego. My home. Santa Fe is awesome.. Hot Topic is a really.. reallllly fun place to work, and Noelani is here. But get this. SHES MOVING TO ALBUQUERQUE!! asdhlaskdjkfhjksdfhlasdjfh
&%$#@!!!!!!!!
I lived down there for EIGHT MONTHS. Eight whole months, and she came to see me one time. ONCE. Mind you - Santa Fe is a 40 min drive to Albuquerque. Yea lame huh? So I find a way to move to her town.. and what does she want to do? Pick up and move to the town I just moved up from. Don't get me wrong, I am not mad at her decision or anything. She wants to support the love of her life.. which is completely understandable. I think he is such a talented person with his music. It only makes sense for him to be in a bigger town with more opportunity. I am happy they have each other and I support whatever is going to make her happy. It just sucks. Now, now I can't leave out the part where she wants me to move back down there.. I told her I would, it is just going to take me some time. I finally feel settled, for the first time in years. I swore I would live out here for at leat 18 months. At least. I can't transfer from Hot Topic until I've worked for the company for 6 months.. which is going to be another five from now. Lame. And even if I did want to transfer to Albuquerque I would have a cut in pay by more than 3 dollars. I make $9.50 now (pretty sweet huh?). Which is only because I am the keyholder and all. But in Albuquerque I would only make $6.15. So it leaves me the option of making the 50 mi commute five times a week to make more money. This all makes my head hurt.
Life changes so FUCKING fast. I was just telling Noe tonight that I might as well just go back to California.. and she of course tried everything in her verbal power to convince me otherwise. When she does move it will be just like it was two years ago, only in reverse. If we are going to be living a city apart from each other, and both working full time..- not to mention her living with her boyfriend - I highly doubt we will get to see each other more than three times a month. Fuck.
Whhyy? My mom hates it here anyway. She likes the idea of moving back to Burque. She has friends down there, and there is just more opportunity for her to succeed with business & real estate. If we sell the house here, it will save her the stress of making the house payment each month. And since Albuquerque is cheaper to live in than Santa Fe, she will have more money. More money means I might get a new car - an ECONOMY type car that will get some good gas mileage. To go back and forth in my truck from Santa to Burque costs me $18. $18 bucks five times a week.. that would be like almost half my paycheck. No good. If this all does happen, that would be the best way to go about the whole thing. We'll see. I need to keep a job for more than a few months. And I am not about to change my life around because of someone else again. I've done it way too many times to even count.
Fuck this shit. I'm going to go smoke a cigarette.
&%$#@!!!!!!!!
I lived down there for EIGHT MONTHS. Eight whole months, and she came to see me one time. ONCE. Mind you - Santa Fe is a 40 min drive to Albuquerque. Yea lame huh? So I find a way to move to her town.. and what does she want to do? Pick up and move to the town I just moved up from. Don't get me wrong, I am not mad at her decision or anything. She wants to support the love of her life.. which is completely understandable. I think he is such a talented person with his music. It only makes sense for him to be in a bigger town with more opportunity. I am happy they have each other and I support whatever is going to make her happy. It just sucks. Now, now I can't leave out the part where she wants me to move back down there.. I told her I would, it is just going to take me some time. I finally feel settled, for the first time in years. I swore I would live out here for at leat 18 months. At least. I can't transfer from Hot Topic until I've worked for the company for 6 months.. which is going to be another five from now. Lame. And even if I did want to transfer to Albuquerque I would have a cut in pay by more than 3 dollars. I make $9.50 now (pretty sweet huh?). Which is only because I am the keyholder and all. But in Albuquerque I would only make $6.15. So it leaves me the option of making the 50 mi commute five times a week to make more money. This all makes my head hurt.
Life changes so FUCKING fast. I was just telling Noe tonight that I might as well just go back to California.. and she of course tried everything in her verbal power to convince me otherwise. When she does move it will be just like it was two years ago, only in reverse. If we are going to be living a city apart from each other, and both working full time..- not to mention her living with her boyfriend - I highly doubt we will get to see each other more than three times a month. Fuck.
Whhyy? My mom hates it here anyway. She likes the idea of moving back to Burque. She has friends down there, and there is just more opportunity for her to succeed with business & real estate. If we sell the house here, it will save her the stress of making the house payment each month. And since Albuquerque is cheaper to live in than Santa Fe, she will have more money. More money means I might get a new car - an ECONOMY type car that will get some good gas mileage. To go back and forth in my truck from Santa to Burque costs me $18. $18 bucks five times a week.. that would be like almost half my paycheck. No good. If this all does happen, that would be the best way to go about the whole thing. We'll see. I need to keep a job for more than a few months. And I am not about to change my life around because of someone else again. I've done it way too many times to even count.
Fuck this shit. I'm going to go smoke a cigarette.