youre about to read some intense shit if you odnt want to then stop now!
I just wanna cry, or scream or kill everyone in my worklplace! I'm sick of all the shit that is being said dont people realizethat sometimes rumors can cause people the worst pain they have ever felt? It's just bullshit i wish people would come to me and ask if shit is true instead of spreading it around to more people trying to get the answer. It's really fucking childish to play the bullshit games that everyone has been playing there. Even people that i thought i could call my close friends are making this hard. I'm sick of hearing my name everytime i walk past people I'm never far enough away before they start talking do they honestly think I'm that stupid! I do hear all the shit that is said about me, i hear all the shit that is said about everyone there. the gossip has reached its highest height there. I have never ever seen it this bad, I mean it's worse than highschool seriously. Even personal issues are starting to be spread and one of the people spreading shit happens to be a manager what the fuck is that? Whatever happened to confidentiality? huh? if you're a manager and an employee comes to you with a problem you keep it to yourself or tell the opther managers that need to know you dont make a story bigger and spread it to the whole fucking staff. There's enough true shit that is goin on there that people are open with isn't that shit juicy enough for people I mean fuckin seriously. at this point i am no longer comfortable working there its not even a dislike factor anymore i mean i have always kinda hated it there but i could never ;eave cause i loved all the people and now its thepeople thjat are making me just want out. I dont even want to put in my notice i just wanna be able to say"I can't do it anymore i can't handle the stories i can;'t handle the lies. I;'m done this is my last shift I'm never coming back!" but i can't fuck them over like that i need to give them time to find someone that can fill my shoes i wont leave them in a bad position when the managers that i would be hurting are not the ones that deserve it! I know its pathetic to rant on LJ bout this but iI have noone i can talk to about it I don't trust half the world right now I just wanna seriously crawl in a hole. you know the feeling you get when you fucked and you don't even get kissed? well thats the feeling i have right now! Used and ashamed, regrettful, spiteful, it feels like my whole life was ripped open and inspected then layed out for the world to see. Though most of the shit that is being said about me isn't true it hurts, some would say "if it's not true and you know it's not then don't let it get to you." but I'm just upset that people would think I'm the kind of person that would do shit like that. I think tomorrow's the day I set out to look for a new job I don't give a shit if i'm working thedrive-thru at fuckin white castle or scubbing toilets AI just want out of the restaraunt business I want to get away from the shit that is hurting me the most. I dont need this stress right now, I cant taske it anymore and i never should have had to. I know alot of shit gets spread about someone because that person says or does something to get it started well this time i did absolutely nothing for all this shit to start! AGHHHH I hate this and noone can help me because noone there believes me when I say its not true they say they do but I know they fuckin don't and it hurts. Is it that great of a story that they cant just let it go and beliee its not true, of course it wouldbnt be any fun if it was a false rumor.