(no subject)
Not that any of you reading this have to worry one way or another in such an instance like this, but the end of today got me so riled up that I thought I would blow off some steam.
The List of items that will get Andrew to help You(tm).
1. Call me up at 6:30pm when I have been at work since at LEAST 8am that morning, and want to leave the god-forsaken place. (As if I HAVE a life!!) Never mind that YOU arrive to the hotel for your full day's work of schmoozing and playing telephone tag at 1:00pm.
2. Make sure that when you call me at 6:30 in the evening, it's for an issue that you could have checked ANY TIME between Noon and whatever hour you called me that day. I just LOVE last minute inspection checks and planning, rather than working well in advance of a deadline. Planning, communication, and coordination is for losers like me.
3. Tell me the size of your guest's payroll, how much they make, and how much revenue they bring to the hotel. That's CERTAINLY going to impress me and make me want to grovel at their feet in order to serve them better. To be honest, I could give a shit what your guest makes, no matter how much or how little. In fact, I'm really getting tired of the diplomats and celebrities and all of these pain-in-the-ass people that equate money to importance.. or better yet, how well they should be treated. -- Never mind the 2000+ guests that spin in and out of this hotel on a daily basis, WE MUST WORSHIP THIS ONE FOR THEY ARE IMPORTANT!!!! --
4. Make unreasonable demands. Of COURSE I can call any repair company or electronic equipment company and get an instant response. Of COURSE I can get a new TV, get it installed, all tonight by midnight. Especially in New York. However, (a) I am leaving tonight and going home. I am NOT staying until midnight for a TV. (b) Find a way to justify these expenses to Finance. Of COURSE your guest is paying enough money that these expenses can be covered. But, the money your guest gives us does NOT go directly into our pocket to spend. The Hilton Corporation (Now Blackstone) does demand their fair share. YOU don't have to justify to Finance the decision to buy these items at such a late hour, nor the exorbitant fee to get it installed with absolutely no notice. YOU (and as a matter-of-fact, me) do not have the power to spend this kind of money without any approval whatsoever. YOU don't have ANY FUCKING CLUE JUST HOW DIFFICULT IT REALLY IS TO SPEND MONEY IN THIS HOTEL because YOU don't have to live by a god-damn budget that you are held accountable for, day in and day out. The only thing YOU know anything about is fawning over people and sniveling well enough to convince them to stay here because WE obviously know just how IMPORTANT they are. (c) Tell me how to do my job. No, I do not have 30 people ready, waiting to help you at this time of night. 90% of my work force has gone home to enjoy having dinner with their families; unlike me. No, I will not call them from home to come in. No, I cannot force them to come in. NO, I will not make my carpenter, already staying 3 hours on overtime until 11pm, stay until the wee hours of the morning to do this when I can have him come in the next morning.
5. Don't bother listening to me. Obviously, you have no clue how to run these electronics, much less the actual technical component differences between a 5-year old 42" plasma monitor with a receiver, and a new 42" plasma TV. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over.
6. When you want me to meet you in order to help appease your client (earlier in the day), please make sure to stand me up and make me waste my time. I'm just thankful to be called to do something during the day that I don't mind standing around waiting for you to show your bald-headed, self-important, stick-up-your-ass, fawning-toadie face so that I can do something to help the hotel. Thank GOD I have you, or I would end up wasting my day doing nothing at all!
But, when you want to say it short and sweet, this is what is running through my mind: Fuck your mother. Have a nice day.
The List of items that will get Andrew to help You(tm).
1. Call me up at 6:30pm when I have been at work since at LEAST 8am that morning, and want to leave the god-forsaken place. (As if I HAVE a life!!) Never mind that YOU arrive to the hotel for your full day's work of schmoozing and playing telephone tag at 1:00pm.
2. Make sure that when you call me at 6:30 in the evening, it's for an issue that you could have checked ANY TIME between Noon and whatever hour you called me that day. I just LOVE last minute inspection checks and planning, rather than working well in advance of a deadline. Planning, communication, and coordination is for losers like me.
3. Tell me the size of your guest's payroll, how much they make, and how much revenue they bring to the hotel. That's CERTAINLY going to impress me and make me want to grovel at their feet in order to serve them better. To be honest, I could give a shit what your guest makes, no matter how much or how little. In fact, I'm really getting tired of the diplomats and celebrities and all of these pain-in-the-ass people that equate money to importance.. or better yet, how well they should be treated. -- Never mind the 2000+ guests that spin in and out of this hotel on a daily basis, WE MUST WORSHIP THIS ONE FOR THEY ARE IMPORTANT!!!! --
4. Make unreasonable demands. Of COURSE I can call any repair company or electronic equipment company and get an instant response. Of COURSE I can get a new TV, get it installed, all tonight by midnight. Especially in New York. However, (a) I am leaving tonight and going home. I am NOT staying until midnight for a TV. (b) Find a way to justify these expenses to Finance. Of COURSE your guest is paying enough money that these expenses can be covered. But, the money your guest gives us does NOT go directly into our pocket to spend. The Hilton Corporation (Now Blackstone) does demand their fair share. YOU don't have to justify to Finance the decision to buy these items at such a late hour, nor the exorbitant fee to get it installed with absolutely no notice. YOU (and as a matter-of-fact, me) do not have the power to spend this kind of money without any approval whatsoever. YOU don't have ANY FUCKING CLUE JUST HOW DIFFICULT IT REALLY IS TO SPEND MONEY IN THIS HOTEL because YOU don't have to live by a god-damn budget that you are held accountable for, day in and day out. The only thing YOU know anything about is fawning over people and sniveling well enough to convince them to stay here because WE obviously know just how IMPORTANT they are. (c) Tell me how to do my job. No, I do not have 30 people ready, waiting to help you at this time of night. 90% of my work force has gone home to enjoy having dinner with their families; unlike me. No, I will not call them from home to come in. No, I cannot force them to come in. NO, I will not make my carpenter, already staying 3 hours on overtime until 11pm, stay until the wee hours of the morning to do this when I can have him come in the next morning.
5. Don't bother listening to me. Obviously, you have no clue how to run these electronics, much less the actual technical component differences between a 5-year old 42" plasma monitor with a receiver, and a new 42" plasma TV. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over. Don't worry, I just LOVE repeating myself over and over.
6. When you want me to meet you in order to help appease your client (earlier in the day), please make sure to stand me up and make me waste my time. I'm just thankful to be called to do something during the day that I don't mind standing around waiting for you to show your bald-headed, self-important, stick-up-your-ass, fawning-toadie face so that I can do something to help the hotel. Thank GOD I have you, or I would end up wasting my day doing nothing at all!
But, when you want to say it short and sweet, this is what is running through my mind: Fuck your mother. Have a nice day.