(no subject)
how do i even to express what i am feeling right now... um, try when you do something stupid and your parents give you the "im not mad, im just disappointed" yeah try that feeling times a thousand....... plus every other feeling i have which i feel no reason to express. i suppose i am getting what i deserve. i pretty much shoved the only thing that really mattered to me right out the door. i could never even begin to explain the things i feel because they are so mixed and so deep i suppose the only thing left to do is hide love, hide regret, keep it all a secret from now on. i cant ask anything from you, i cant expect anything from you. so therefore there is pretty much not a you for me. youre moving on and i have to accept that. the only thing i can do is hope that you know that i do love you and i do care and i wish i could explain so many things to you so you could maybe begin to understand. but i cant. there is no way for me to do that.
the tears are falling so hard and fast, i cant even see what i am doing.
i have no idea whats going to happen in the future, but as of right now i dont care. fuck it all. whats the point. ill only end up screwing anything good that happens up. i always do. as my dad says, im a screwup, count on me to screw it up.
the tears are falling so hard and fast, i cant even see what i am doing.
i have no idea whats going to happen in the future, but as of right now i dont care. fuck it all. whats the point. ill only end up screwing anything good that happens up. i always do. as my dad says, im a screwup, count on me to screw it up.