(no subject)
....I believe I've lost the ability to cry.....as a child I was an exessive crier, and I think around middle school I just stoped.....I remember when I was very young, any time I got in trouble I would cry....It didn't matter what it was at all. If I caused my parents any grief (Even if they didn't mention it) I would cry histeracley....And this emberassed my parents so unintentionally I would get out of any trouble that I was in...(this is all comeing back to me, I can't believe I forgot)....one time, I remember I really screwed up, I was around I think 10-11(somewere around 5th-6th grade). I can't remember what I did, but my dad brought me into his room. I began to tear up emediatly because he was angry. This only made him angrier. It kept on building, my tears and poportionatly his anger....All I remember after that was him just yelling.....nothing violent happened (my father loved me), its just I now recall the utter fear I was in.....I think that was the last time I cried.....I've actually become quite frustrated of late...things that I know should make me cry....any human to cry....don't effect me.....I've even tried....I'll sum up the worst memory of the strongest fealings of saddness....and the worst so far is that feeling right before you cry....Anyway sorry for rambling....I'm just frustrated....my body bugs me.