Where does this road go?
Road dont go no where. Stays right there where it is.
^ Randy Venn's unreal maine impression.
It all began Friday with a cheery little four hour drive to Maine…not pansy Maine either, wayyy up there Maine. We watched Van Wilder, making the ride seem shorter. On the way we stopped at BK where Brian raped the rest stop of all of its napkins for NO reason. I couldn’t eat…yeah, I have a virus that has impacted my eating since Tuesday. It was a long week. Its getting much better though. Thanks to everyone who asked about the sores. They are healed lol.
So anyways…Scott took me on tour of the Waterville, Maine Super Wal-Mart. Those stores have everything. No joke. It’s a little scary. So we enter the town we were destined for…still cant spell its name. Scott reads me a sign: “Population 881.” Our high school is more populated than this town. We were so in Maine, baby.
So we get in and such, and go see Meaghan. She’s Scott and Brian’s neighbor who spends her whole summer there every year and lives in Florida the rest of the time. We have some common likes and dislikes, we also find fun in discussing the winning traits of our boyfriends (and their brothers lol.) We watched some shooting stars and sat around a fire pit. Then the kids whose parents rented the house next to meaghan’s came over. Matt and Jordan. Maine natives born and raised. That’s all that needs to be said for one to imagine what these fellows were like. They heard our fire was struggling so they took the liberty of pouring gasoline on it. Smokey the Bear would have been pissed. Then we watched them try to set off fireworks with an empty lighter, knowing it was empty. That got old. So once Scott got them a working lighter and they went off, me scott and bri went to watch movies and go to bed.
Ok Saturday started early…we went in the lake where I impaled my foot on a rock. But I am tough and let it bleed lol. Then we met this guy who was in WW2. Then I almost passed out. That was fun. So I decided to force food down my virus-ridden throat because it was 100 out. Then I met Betty. She is 93 and a very cool lady. Her daughter and son-in-law are teachers at Plymouth State. I hope all of Scott’s teachers are as earthy as they were. It will make for some interesting stories. Then I think we went on Meaghan’s sail boat. We didn’t sail all that much because there was little wind. But we coasted. Then we got bored and had scott pull us into shore. What a pal. Thennn, im forgetting the sequence of events, we went with the maine kids out in meaghan’s boat. That didn’t go as well as planned because of anchor problems…so we came back. Then we went on the 4-wheelers and went mudding. To some up the rules of mudding…drive four wheeler through as many huge mud puddles with the objective to be covering youself in it. Sounds pretty weird, so much fun though. Then we went in a river and wheeled ourselves home. Then we swam more. Then me scott and bri went fishing in the paddle boat. Brian caught two bushes and a tree. Then dinner. (By now I was able to almost eat.) Then we went on a “leisurely boat tour” and I learned how to drive one of those things. Scott and Meaghan water skied for a bit and we got back right before a big ole thunderstorm came.
Then I showered and brian showed me how to play chess. It is way too much thinking for a beginner so I eventually just let scott play for me but he got distracted by chips so I finished and lost. Me and bri played a quick game of charades at one point too. I wateched Fools Rush In with Scott and Bri, then bri fell asleep, only to wake up shortly after because he is a big buffet. So him and his brother whined about being hot and itchy. Brian tried a variety of medicines and ice. Scott wanted to sleep but me and bri were not tired so we picked on him til he woke up. Then I went back to my youth of napping at my nanas and I used to make really comfy couch beds…so scott took the sheet of my bed and I made a cool couch bed for him so he wasn’t on the rough couch fabric. Yeah, im pretty pimp lol. Then we watched Monk, and pirates of the Caribbean and went to bed. I completely stole the boys room from them…felt bad for a few minutes but it was ultimately quite comfy.
Woke up to brian showing me his moose shirt the next morning. Then again to Piper who I think got really confused when she realized I wasn’t one of the boys so she hid under scotts bed. Then later couldn’t get out of the room so I woke up to open the door for her lol Then finally I got up on my own. Everyone was already doing their own Maine things…so I watched lifetime and waited for scott to wake up. His mom woke him up though and then we made really funny tasting pancakes. Then Bri came in from mowing bettys lawn and I thought he was going to die. But he survived. We went through some venn family picture albums. Those boys were too cute. Carol and Randy’s Halloween costumes were out of control as well. So creative.
Then Scott shaved Brian’s head per request. Meaghan helped. It came out quite good.
Then we went tubing. It was quite amusing. Not only did we get to see bri’s butt a few times but watching me and my stumpy self climb onto a tube while in water and a lifejacket is always humorous. Apparently I am not “outdoorsy” enough to do that. Then we came home and scott went to lay down and brian went somewhere…so me and meaghan watched tv and then we ate dinner. Then bri and meaghan went 4wheeling again but I thought id let bri go alone since his last experience was a bit of a struggle. So packed up, wrapped up, embarked homeward.
Stopped for food, which is keyy. Got some gas. Also key. Drove. Sang to Scott. Watched Scott lip sync. We decided on “Big Yellow Taxi” that we are an unbelievable trio. Hit horrid rain and couldn’t see. Played in the rain with Brian. Watched “The Girl Next Door.“ Stopped in nh to get bri clothes so we could smuggle him back into someplace special. Got the tour of that house. Came on home.
I have to say, I really did like it there. I had my doubts that a suburban girl like me would make it in the country. Lol Maine has like no stress, no worries. You don’t wear makeup, do your hair or worry about what you wear. You spend time doing stuff you wouldn’t do back here. You don’t sit online or spend hours trying to make plans. You don’t need a cell phone with you or on because you cant get service anyways. Now I don’t think I could make my permanent residence there, but for a potential teacher with summers off it seems like a possibility.
Well this was way longer than expected so to wrap it up…I am scraped, sunburnt with insect bites everywhere…and it was completely worth it.
Later Y’All xoxo
^ Randy Venn's unreal maine impression.
It all began Friday with a cheery little four hour drive to Maine…not pansy Maine either, wayyy up there Maine. We watched Van Wilder, making the ride seem shorter. On the way we stopped at BK where Brian raped the rest stop of all of its napkins for NO reason. I couldn’t eat…yeah, I have a virus that has impacted my eating since Tuesday. It was a long week. Its getting much better though. Thanks to everyone who asked about the sores. They are healed lol.
So anyways…Scott took me on tour of the Waterville, Maine Super Wal-Mart. Those stores have everything. No joke. It’s a little scary. So we enter the town we were destined for…still cant spell its name. Scott reads me a sign: “Population 881.” Our high school is more populated than this town. We were so in Maine, baby.
So we get in and such, and go see Meaghan. She’s Scott and Brian’s neighbor who spends her whole summer there every year and lives in Florida the rest of the time. We have some common likes and dislikes, we also find fun in discussing the winning traits of our boyfriends (and their brothers lol.) We watched some shooting stars and sat around a fire pit. Then the kids whose parents rented the house next to meaghan’s came over. Matt and Jordan. Maine natives born and raised. That’s all that needs to be said for one to imagine what these fellows were like. They heard our fire was struggling so they took the liberty of pouring gasoline on it. Smokey the Bear would have been pissed. Then we watched them try to set off fireworks with an empty lighter, knowing it was empty. That got old. So once Scott got them a working lighter and they went off, me scott and bri went to watch movies and go to bed.
Ok Saturday started early…we went in the lake where I impaled my foot on a rock. But I am tough and let it bleed lol. Then we met this guy who was in WW2. Then I almost passed out. That was fun. So I decided to force food down my virus-ridden throat because it was 100 out. Then I met Betty. She is 93 and a very cool lady. Her daughter and son-in-law are teachers at Plymouth State. I hope all of Scott’s teachers are as earthy as they were. It will make for some interesting stories. Then I think we went on Meaghan’s sail boat. We didn’t sail all that much because there was little wind. But we coasted. Then we got bored and had scott pull us into shore. What a pal. Thennn, im forgetting the sequence of events, we went with the maine kids out in meaghan’s boat. That didn’t go as well as planned because of anchor problems…so we came back. Then we went on the 4-wheelers and went mudding. To some up the rules of mudding…drive four wheeler through as many huge mud puddles with the objective to be covering youself in it. Sounds pretty weird, so much fun though. Then we went in a river and wheeled ourselves home. Then we swam more. Then me scott and bri went fishing in the paddle boat. Brian caught two bushes and a tree. Then dinner. (By now I was able to almost eat.) Then we went on a “leisurely boat tour” and I learned how to drive one of those things. Scott and Meaghan water skied for a bit and we got back right before a big ole thunderstorm came.
Then I showered and brian showed me how to play chess. It is way too much thinking for a beginner so I eventually just let scott play for me but he got distracted by chips so I finished and lost. Me and bri played a quick game of charades at one point too. I wateched Fools Rush In with Scott and Bri, then bri fell asleep, only to wake up shortly after because he is a big buffet. So him and his brother whined about being hot and itchy. Brian tried a variety of medicines and ice. Scott wanted to sleep but me and bri were not tired so we picked on him til he woke up. Then I went back to my youth of napping at my nanas and I used to make really comfy couch beds…so scott took the sheet of my bed and I made a cool couch bed for him so he wasn’t on the rough couch fabric. Yeah, im pretty pimp lol. Then we watched Monk, and pirates of the Caribbean and went to bed. I completely stole the boys room from them…felt bad for a few minutes but it was ultimately quite comfy.
Woke up to brian showing me his moose shirt the next morning. Then again to Piper who I think got really confused when she realized I wasn’t one of the boys so she hid under scotts bed. Then later couldn’t get out of the room so I woke up to open the door for her lol Then finally I got up on my own. Everyone was already doing their own Maine things…so I watched lifetime and waited for scott to wake up. His mom woke him up though and then we made really funny tasting pancakes. Then Bri came in from mowing bettys lawn and I thought he was going to die. But he survived. We went through some venn family picture albums. Those boys were too cute. Carol and Randy’s Halloween costumes were out of control as well. So creative.
Then Scott shaved Brian’s head per request. Meaghan helped. It came out quite good.
Then we went tubing. It was quite amusing. Not only did we get to see bri’s butt a few times but watching me and my stumpy self climb onto a tube while in water and a lifejacket is always humorous. Apparently I am not “outdoorsy” enough to do that. Then we came home and scott went to lay down and brian went somewhere…so me and meaghan watched tv and then we ate dinner. Then bri and meaghan went 4wheeling again but I thought id let bri go alone since his last experience was a bit of a struggle. So packed up, wrapped up, embarked homeward.
Stopped for food, which is keyy. Got some gas. Also key. Drove. Sang to Scott. Watched Scott lip sync. We decided on “Big Yellow Taxi” that we are an unbelievable trio. Hit horrid rain and couldn’t see. Played in the rain with Brian. Watched “The Girl Next Door.“ Stopped in nh to get bri clothes so we could smuggle him back into someplace special. Got the tour of that house. Came on home.
I have to say, I really did like it there. I had my doubts that a suburban girl like me would make it in the country. Lol Maine has like no stress, no worries. You don’t wear makeup, do your hair or worry about what you wear. You spend time doing stuff you wouldn’t do back here. You don’t sit online or spend hours trying to make plans. You don’t need a cell phone with you or on because you cant get service anyways. Now I don’t think I could make my permanent residence there, but for a potential teacher with summers off it seems like a possibility.
Well this was way longer than expected so to wrap it up…I am scraped, sunburnt with insect bites everywhere…and it was completely worth it.
Later Y’All xoxo