i hate lovers day:o(
this is so stupid.
ok so.
u say that u want to go back to how we used to be, before everything, just best friends like we were a couple years ago.
you see the only problem is that i am so willing to try and do that but how u have been acting is nothing like we used to be. i think maybe we have been through to much to go back to that, sad but true. back in the day u had respect for me, you wanted to hang out with me, you wanted to talk to me, you werent ashamed to have me around ur friends. but now it seems you are. you make it so hard to be your friend cuz u cant make up ur mind what u want. every move you make you make sure its not leading me on. i can see why you do that because u know i fall fast and well i never really got up in the 1st place, but were never gonna get past this if u keep making me feel like shit. i have had enough of it.
you used to talk to me like a friend.
the other day u said that u dont like being around the same ppl day after day. well thats what we were pretty much. i dont think you realize how bad it hurts someone to hear that their "friend" doesnt want to hang out cuz they will get sick of you?? wtf thats no friend. im sick of bugging you, im sick of caring about you, im sick of listening to u hurt my feelings, im sick of everything. i wish i got some say in how my life is supposed to be, instead of u making these stupid decisions on when we can and cant hang out. fuck that.
i love how u say that i have changed and how a certain things have made me meaner, because its true. except ur idea of why im like this is totally wrong. its because i have been push around by you for the past year and finally i am extremely sick of it.
i dont want to get pushed around nemore, i dont want someone in my life that can make me feel so worthless and stupid and unloved. i am better than that and u know it.
its true i wish we could go back to our old ways, and sometimes it feels like we do but the rest of the time cuts it out . i thought it was worth all this just to have thos certain times that feel right, but i dont know if it is anymore. because when ur not around i feel like shit,
i wish i could delete our relationship from my memory for a couple years so i can just be happy or so we could just be us again(friends)but thats impossible, so im pretty much screwed. its horrible when u dont know if all the good times were worth all of these bad ones. :o/
i dont know what to do nemore...someone help me :o(