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asexuality
vaginismus and asexuality
I'm an asexual woman and few months ago I was diagnosed with vaginismus and wondering if there's a connection with asexuality. I'll cut this as there is a discussion of sex.( Read more... )
I've been diagnosed with this and I can tell you from my own PERSONAL experience that this problem seems to be PURELY Physical; at least in my case. So far in the medical community when there is clearly a problem that they can not even diagnose much less treat they go to the mind, saying that it is something psychological since they are at a loss of what to do. Sadly the medical community has not been able to advance far enough yet to diagnose the myriad of causes that would cause such a thing as vaginismus and other such things.
I eventually had to realize for myself that not only was the doctor not doing things right down there when it came to trying to give me an exam (she was a college student in her last 4 years) but that there is NO true information or help out there if you have something wrong with you in this area.
I don't want to be the bearer of doom and gloom here, but the medical community is a machine and it has no room for purely finding and curing disease anymore, it's purely a business now. Terribly and sadly, leaving people who have "undiagnosed" problems like this one with nothing.
I will tell you this though, no matter what DO NOT believe what everyone, even your doctor will tell you, when they point the finger of blame at you (as happened to me) and say it's all your fault. No your NOT nervous, Nor excited, nor of an uptight personality. You're NOT causing the muscles to constrict down there, or getting scared, angry, who knows what, have childhood traumas that you're suppressing who knows. It's AMAZING how IMAGINATIVE the "educated" can become. And no it's NOT your sexuality. The ONE thing the doc I went to got right was that she said my sexuality had NOTHING to do with my "muscles not cooperating". So DON'T end up HATING yourself for being A-Sexual (something I I ended up in anyway, despite the doctors protests in this ONE area. :-(! )
I have been dealing with, in and been educated in and worked in and around the medical arena for years now and I can tell you from first hand experience that it's truly a MACHINE with a bunch of people who seem at times barely able to write their own names. Sad but true.
Overall if you're having problems the best thing to do is to go and find another doctor and keep going to new ones till you find one that actually HELPS you and doesn't belittle your pain, concerns or words. It may take years heck it may take a lifetime (until recently I have not been able to find any good doctors. I finally got my hands on ONE Family Physician but he's moved now. :-(! And I have found an EXCELLENT Oncologist but again I will more then likely not be seeing him again either, money and all. :-(! ).
But it is better to search for a lifetime to finally find what you are needing then to give up and never get it. :-)
Well, I'll get off my soap box now, I hope I have been able to help some; and keep on searching; and don't let ANYONE tell you that there's something wrong with you, there isn't. The second you hear that you just need to go and find a physician that will listen to what you are saying and WORK With you instead of waving off your illnesses, pains and other problems. :-) *lots of love*
Tactless Truth
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