Disappearance of Denmark Ch. 7

[aseies]

Title: Disappearance of Denmark
Author: ASEies (AmeUmi36@Deviantart)
Rating: T (there are slightly mature scenes in later chapters)
Characters: (main) Norway, Iceland, Finland, Sweden, Denmark, (secondary) OC!Greenland, England, Prussia
Couples: Denmark/Norway, Sweden/Finland, Hinted Greenland/Iceland, Hinted England/China
Warnings: Angst, OCs,

Comments

[aseies]

You guys make me feel bad for not considering how Prussia felt at all. /shot

I can understand that. I rewrote this at 3am after all-- it was less prosy before but the problem was there was a lot of telling not showing, so I was trying to show more than just say he was reminiscing and stuff.

... I might just write a ficlet about that scene. :I It does sound interesting. I just didn't want to deal with it at the time. I was also going to have Norway remember another scene after it, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. /shot

Haha;; I know my Denmark is kinda shallower than yours but with this fic I was trying hard to grasp his character and other characters like him. His type of character is hard for me to write.

I'm glad it had good flow after that point. I did put in that line because of Lady Gaga though I don't think I was listening to her at the time. xD -- With the kiss, Denmark does end up topping but it's offscreen. And this is probably one of the very few kisses that Norway ever tops in so. /shot That was another scene that I rewrote. I think that if it was from Denmark's perspective we would have had more of him trying to top. Though you're right, I could have done it better.

Thanks for the review. =) And yes, I think it's character bias. xD

[amayara]

...oh, really? I was about to commend you for having Norway top for once. In general, I hate it when one character *always* tops or *always* bottoms, and in particular I really, really don't see Norway always taking it. Even more in particular, I think it makes more sense for him to be dominant/topping here. He's coming into this tryst with a lot more emotion than Denmark, and while (I'm assuming) Denmark's expecting a PYT to top for the night, Norway's going to want to be showing him why he shouldn't let him go.

But that's just me.

[sparklingtea]

/about to back track majorly

I agree with you though about that Denmark doesn't always top or Norway always tops, but when Denmark's drunk in my head, he does tend to be a bit more forceful. I think aseies did a good job with Norge topping the kiss, but of course with characters like Denmark and Norway (and most of Hetalia), a lot is put up to the writer of the fanfic.

I could definitely see what you supposed happened, happening though. Actually, now that you bring it up, I kind of prefer it.

[aseies]

In my headcanon Den and Nor switch who tops all the time. In fact, they sometimes fight over who tops. Den ends up topping more often though. And yeah, that's basically what I was thinking. Nor's been wanting to see him for a long time... *rubs neck, wishy-washiness showing* This is the first time I wrote Denmark, I always RP'd Norway with sparklingtea's Denmark, so I guess I was somewhat cushioning the crit. Plus, we like to tease Nor a lot, so in our conversations we make him out to be more of a sub than he really is.

You bring up really good points, and points that I probably took into consideration when I was writing the story, but might have forgotten when I was writing the comment. /sorry for the contraditions

[amayara]

nah, s'okay. 's your story, after all~ I was just /super excited face/ at first because i can freakin' never find Norway topping, and then /d-face/ at the comments.

in otherwords, i'm really enjoying your fic~

[aseies]

Haha Sorry. I might write a fic sometime with Nor topping. But I don't write smut so that might be hard...

It's not the same, but can I recommend this to you? Nor tops big time.

... Actually, I'll just rewrite this scene as a fic sometime. Problem solved. /hopes I have time

I'm glad you're enjoying this fic though~

[aseies]

Also, I want to thank you for commenting like that. I got a lot out of your comment, but the most important one was that I need to think through my responses more, and stand up for myself when I have an opposing view.

I can normally see all points in an argument, so I have a hard time standing up for my own views because others' views make sense to me. But that doesn't mean I should conform to their views to make them happy.