The healing that night has shed

[highnoonsun]

Who: Theodore Nott, Edric Nott and Rudolph Atkins
What: Theo is okay!
Where: Wouldn't you like to know?
When: Saturday, June 10th, 2000
Status: Complete

The ferret was back to its usual mischief, bouncing around the room, chewing on things it shouldn't be chewing on, knocking things off of tables, generally getting underfoot.

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[highnoonsun]

Denial was on the tip of Edric's tongue; not one person was caused any harm by his obliviation in his long career, but he had never put memories back. Rudy was right. Edric didn't really want to be there when Rudy woke up. If it worked at all.

But Rudy didn't want to think about it, and Edric didn't want to talk about it, so it worked out. Edric had the acquiescence he needed, the issue was settled. It was only Edric that needed to do any more thinking. Like what would happen if he ruined Rudy forever, or the plan failed, or ultimately there was nothing of use in the museum anyway. Would Rudy be angry with him? Would he know to be angry with him? Would he need to be taught how to shave and to flirt and how much wine it took to get him falling off the boat (red: four glasses, white: seven; six and nine respectively if Edric was pouring) again?

The water sighed as Edric took his hand away to swirl through the bath and run a leaking palm full of soapy drops over Rudy's hair, watching it run over his forehead and drip from his nose. Still leaning against his other arm, cheek pressed to it now, he said, "It's funny when you wake up now." The grin was only held back for a moment, then turned into his sleeve, Edric still watching his friend over his arm with raised eyebrows, dropping more water into his hair.

[maledettodolly]

Like the crisp toll of a bell or the quick jerk of a shoe on cement, Rudy was acutely aware of everything in fine detail: the wet drip down his skin and down Edric's forearm to his elbow, and the exact taste that soapy water might have coming off his skin. There was going to be little time to appreciate these small details: soon his frustration was going to boil over, he was going to say no and Edric was going to be gone. Rudy was going to have everything he ever wanted and more, and give up the only constant in his life so far besides a pet rat. He could acknowledge what a bad mistake it would be for them to part at such a... vulnerable time. And that he would make bad choices along the way and he couldn't avoid them. And that it wasn't going to be the same when Edric got back. Something would have changed by then, as it was changing between them now. And so he had to appreciate it. Before all those bad choices and arguments and parting.

So as the sun rolled low in the distance, and crept through the porthole red and coral and warm over his skin and sending the bathroom into stark ethereal orange relief, Rudy leaned up and kissed Edric's wrist, hanging over his head. Soft and lingering and breathing in before pulling away and sliding into the water with a small satisfied sigh, eyes closed to the world and to the hope that Edric's fingers would continue their exploration of his mangy hair.

He could guess now, breathing in again and savouring the subtleties that Edric was sweet today: like apples and cinnamon burnt under wheat bread and blue cheese. Sweet, and tangy and spicy and warm and then, overpowering everything, soapy. He chuckled low and quietly to himself, arms laying lazily over his stomach, knees bending to stick out of the tub and fall against the porcelain as he summoned more hot water with a dexterous toe.

[highnoonsun]

Of course they continued, dropping to push the damp curls back from Rudy's face, slowly working to untangle them, though not much was accomplished. The kiss should have gone barely heeded, if not for the tension lingering in Edric from the ridiculous article that morning. That sort of thing happened all the time between them, didn't it? Enough for it to just be shrugged off, not even considered, just normal. Like Edric's thumb along Rudy's hairline, catching the drops of water before they slid into his eyebrows.

With Rudy's eyes closed, without scrutiny, it continued to be normal for a moment. Taking in Rudy's flushed skin, in perfect portrait light, the worry printed into his brow and the laughter around his eyes and his long neck and the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest and his long fingers over his hard stomach--

The chair scraped across the tiles, Edric standing abruptly, patting his pockets, sitting with the same energy and keeping his focus trained on his new cigarette. That wasn't normal. Whatever that was in his throat or chest or whatever. It kept getting worse, since Rudy started being around all the time. Like something had changed, like suddenly it wasn't enough.

But that was normal, wasn't it? Their relationship changed. They lived together, they ate together, fuck, the man helped him take care of his son. He had been married to Rudy longer than he was ever married to Laura, they just never exchanged the rings.

Merlin, stop it. It isn't fucking well normal. You've had thirteen years to decide this lifestyle was lonely and ridiculous, and fifty to decide that you want to fuck Rudy (not that that is what this is, that's kind of extreme, it just sort of seems like that to an outsider, doesn't it?). That's a hell of a long time, and if you didn't decide long ago, nothing has fucking changed.
You're stressed. You're tired. You need Rudy for other things, and it's getting all muddled.

The surprise of the ash dropping on its head sent the ferret running straight into the leg of the bathtub, creating a distinct thunk to ring through the bathroom, drawing Edric's attention back in that direction. Where it stayed, even as the ferret slipped out of the bathroom in its distress.

[maledettodolly]

An eye cracked open, and Rudy stared at Edric with pleading eyes, tilting his neck and encouraging those fingers back. Why had they stopped? Where had they gone? What was he doing to cause a rampaging ferret and accomplishing nothing about Rudy's head.

"You're distracted." A statement, not a question. His hand over the side of the tub and urging Edric's elbow up and fingers against his neck and geez, what're you thinking about? What happened to the touching. My hair is messy. Indignant, whiny. Please, please, please.

"You might as well do it now. I don't want to forget to remind you later.' It was meant to be funny, and it could be if Rudy forgot about why he was trying to laugh it off.

[highnoonsun]

"Remind me?" Edric said with an uncontrolled level of surprise before he had thought. Edric didn't need to be reminded to want to drag Rudy out of the tub to finally taste the skin of his perfect pale neck-- was Rudy actively reminding him, had he missed something, was he supposed to--

"The bath, you'll get...hair all...the pipes," Edric managed to choke, taking his arm back again to press his forehead to his palm, squeezing his eyes shut. Now who was on the wrong chapter?

This needed to end. "Fuck, the kettle," he grumbled, leaving Rudy to whatever bewilderment he had offered to make the tea he had promised.

[maledettodolly]

There was a gorge of water and Rudy was standing, steam drying from his skin and hair curling around his ears and against his neck. Messily he stepped out, dripping water and soap where he went and across the bathroom to curl into a thick towel. Hair was ruffled and skin was patted down and Rudy was wandering into his bedroom again, finding his jeans and slipping into them bare. He had no clothes here any longer and he wasn't about to filthy himself up again with blood and dirt.

The kettle. Kettle. Right.

"No sugar today!" He called, deciding he preferred something creamy and bitter and that Ed would habitually be filling his cup, and maybe one for Theo unless Ed's distraction, whatever it had been, kept at it. Distracting.

Slowly, he meandered back into the bathroom, gripped the head of the chair, and dragged it to turn it around and slump into it. His legs stuck out before him and crossed, one ankle over the other and he felt his wet stubble with a warm hand, patient and determinedly un-thoughtful.