Things that are new in my life
I think it's been a while since my last post still that's because I've not had things to say. Here is however a quick run down of the new things in my life.
Firstly all fanish things including every icon community I'm in has taken a back seat, this is because I have a new obsession in my life, sewing. I never thought this would ever happen in my life but for some reason even though I have actual money these days I decided the best way to fill my wardrobe with maxi skirts and dresses was to make them so I bought a sewing machine.
It's only a little half sized thing, but my mum said she'd give me hers later so I wasn't sending unnecessary money, but mums version of 'later' is likely to be next year quite possibly next summer so I decided a little basic travel size model would get me started. So far I've made 2 maxi skirts one a navy jersey and one a black not quite sheer flower print both a very simple skirts and neither are perfect, but they are wearable so for my first attempts I'm happy. I've sot some nice cotton poka dot prints and a bit more jersey of the market for a very good price and then some lovely but much dearer even on sale navy and white striped jersey from John lewis hidden away for my next projects.
Like all things, I can't just 'like' something I either obsess or I'm not interested there is no middle ground for me, although like all obsessions of mine once the shinney new factor wares off it should die down enough that I can integrate it in alongside all my existing obsessions fanishish and otherwise so I will be back to making icons and general squeeing soon enough.
On the work related front I've had another Hermes girl join me last month this is mostly good but I can't talk and work apparently so i need to get a handle on that. Also for some reason I stress more now I have another colleague not less, I don't know I guess when I had no one to help with the stressful ones I just got on with it, but now I have someone to stress at my brain doesn't stop stressing.
In less positive job news I have my monthly review tomorrow, only I've been there 4 months and its my first 'monthly review' so I'm pretty terrified that they will pick up that I've been doing things wrong this entire time and I'm far to slow (this one is true). If it was my first month this would not be so bad, but I don't want to hear after 4 months that got the basics wrong because that much worse after 4 months than 4 weeks. Also after 4 weeks you can say yes I'm slow but I'm getting faster as I get used to it, that doesn't wash after 4 months. So yes I'm shitting my self about this monthly review thing, and it's booked it 1 hour into my first shirt shift this week (tomorrow) that has to be the worst time for me. And if it goes badly I've still a whole shift before I can go home cry and flail.
Other than that, I went home for fathers day and while good times were had there was also some serious screaming matches where I'm accused of being a terrible daughter who can't even come home to visit her dying father unlike my little sister who'll be out the door as soon as she has the money. It ended up with a yelling match about how I feel my sister all ready has a life there while she gets to leave I'll be forced to given mine up and stay, and I don't want to. I feel bad because my dads dying I shouldn't mind going home for the end and my mum, but I also feel better now at least my feeling on moving back home are in the open.
So other than that, lifes going good. I feel like I have a life and I enjoy it which I haven't felt like in 10years (which is why i'm so desperate not to give it up and move home) I have money, I have hobbies, I have my evenings back where I'm not too emotionally warn out and strung out to do anything unlike my la senza days. I have a life and it's good.
Firstly all fanish things including every icon community I'm in has taken a back seat, this is because I have a new obsession in my life, sewing. I never thought this would ever happen in my life but for some reason even though I have actual money these days I decided the best way to fill my wardrobe with maxi skirts and dresses was to make them so I bought a sewing machine.
It's only a little half sized thing, but my mum said she'd give me hers later so I wasn't sending unnecessary money, but mums version of 'later' is likely to be next year quite possibly next summer so I decided a little basic travel size model would get me started. So far I've made 2 maxi skirts one a navy jersey and one a black not quite sheer flower print both a very simple skirts and neither are perfect, but they are wearable so for my first attempts I'm happy. I've sot some nice cotton poka dot prints and a bit more jersey of the market for a very good price and then some lovely but much dearer even on sale navy and white striped jersey from John lewis hidden away for my next projects.
Like all things, I can't just 'like' something I either obsess or I'm not interested there is no middle ground for me, although like all obsessions of mine once the shinney new factor wares off it should die down enough that I can integrate it in alongside all my existing obsessions fanishish and otherwise so I will be back to making icons and general squeeing soon enough.
On the work related front I've had another Hermes girl join me last month this is mostly good but I can't talk and work apparently so i need to get a handle on that. Also for some reason I stress more now I have another colleague not less, I don't know I guess when I had no one to help with the stressful ones I just got on with it, but now I have someone to stress at my brain doesn't stop stressing.
In less positive job news I have my monthly review tomorrow, only I've been there 4 months and its my first 'monthly review' so I'm pretty terrified that they will pick up that I've been doing things wrong this entire time and I'm far to slow (this one is true). If it was my first month this would not be so bad, but I don't want to hear after 4 months that got the basics wrong because that much worse after 4 months than 4 weeks. Also after 4 weeks you can say yes I'm slow but I'm getting faster as I get used to it, that doesn't wash after 4 months. So yes I'm shitting my self about this monthly review thing, and it's booked it 1 hour into my first shirt shift this week (tomorrow) that has to be the worst time for me. And if it goes badly I've still a whole shift before I can go home cry and flail.
Other than that, I went home for fathers day and while good times were had there was also some serious screaming matches where I'm accused of being a terrible daughter who can't even come home to visit her dying father unlike my little sister who'll be out the door as soon as she has the money. It ended up with a yelling match about how I feel my sister all ready has a life there while she gets to leave I'll be forced to given mine up and stay, and I don't want to. I feel bad because my dads dying I shouldn't mind going home for the end and my mum, but I also feel better now at least my feeling on moving back home are in the open.
So other than that, lifes going good. I feel like I have a life and I enjoy it which I haven't felt like in 10years (which is why i'm so desperate not to give it up and move home) I have money, I have hobbies, I have my evenings back where I'm not too emotionally warn out and strung out to do anything unlike my la senza days. I have a life and it's good.