The Story of Crazy-Tito.
I had to find the perfect icon for this post. Because this post, my friends, is King of Creepy.
I've made this post before, but I'm thinking I made it from my recently purged journal, and I can't find it! This is fucking with me in high quantities, because it really was a great post. But since I really want to be able to remember this experience, I'll type it all up again. It's worth it. And people have been asking me lately about my history with him. So I will share. :)
Recently there has been a serious influx of Tito-victims, and while my first instinct is to laugh really really reallyreallyreally hard, I am beginning to feel really bad for these women; who are apparently actually chewing up his bullshit and swallowing. Digesting, even. THEY ARE DIGESTING!
This story dates back to July 19, 2003. Yes.. I remember the date. I remember the date, because this is by far the creepiest and most horrifyingly WEIRD human being I have ever had the displeasure of meeting. And seriously, when you come across one of those, not only will you remember the date, but you'll remember the time and the smell in the air and the taste in your mouth. Everything. This person creeps me out more than midgets. And anyone who knows me knows that midgets are my "ick" thing, and I can't even look at one without going into convulsions. He's worse than that.
Tito. Tito Cardenas, right? Or is it Tito Moreno? Tito Fuentes? Tito Gonzalez? He's like 18,000,000 different Tito's, apparently. All of which are EQUALLY CREEPY!
July 19, 2003. I had made plans with Tito, who was a friend of mine via internet, to meet up that day. You see, he was going to be in town (Hawai'i) for his sister's wedding. We had become very close over AIM, and he was very supportive of my vowed year of celibacy, and really I did want to meet the man I had made such great friends with. On top of that, I offered to let him stay at my home, because I had an extra bedroom and because I thought "well he'll be with his family the whole time anyway, so at least we'll get to spend a few minutes together each day".
It was a few days before he came to visit that I got the ick-vibe. He mentioned something about his sister and fiancé fighting a lot, and he didn't know if the wedding was still going to take place. I thought it was strange that he kept updating me on the status of his sister's love affairs, as if I actually gave a shit; but then I was his wedding date, so I figured.. who knows what the hell I figured, I was sex-less I would've listened to anything at that point.
Supposedly his sister & co. were going to fly to Hawai'i the day before, to check in to the hotel, get shit situated.. do wedding things. So. Yeah. Who cares about that, it has no basis on this story whatsoever EXCEPT for that when Tito was to get on his plane he calls me and tells me that his sister is on her way back from Hawai'i, because she broke off the engagement.
Flashing Red Light Alert!!!!!!
It just seemed so odd to me. Who does that? No one does that. No one gets on a plane to Hawai'i to get married, and then promptly cancels and goes back home. No one else except Julia Roberts and Richard Gere. No one!
Alas, he told me that the fiancé was still in Hawai'i, so he wanted to come and comfort him. Be there for him. Give him huggy hugs and things. On top of that the family was going to attempt to coerce the sister into going back to Hawai'i so "all should be fine". Once again, I'm like "Drr, otay".
Bring on the Tito. I pick him up from the airport. He was creepy from the moment I met him. My whole aura was like "this fucker is weird, Glexandria." I ignored the weirdness. I do however, distinctly remember calling happy_buddha to tell him just how weird this individual was. Not only was he weird, but I swear he's a closet homosexual. Which is fine. I love the gay. But THIS particular gay kept randomly trying to make out with me! It was so fucking CUH-REEEEE-PYYYY!!
He would hover over me during all hours of the day. I was questioned when I needed to pee. He'd watch and read everything I typed on the computer. I'd come home to my shit being out of place. It was WEIRD. After a couple of days I began to notice that not once had he picked up the phone to contact his family, who was supposedly experiencing CHAOS back on the mainland, trying to convince the friggin' runaway bride to come back to Hawai'i. On top of that, this supposed fiancé was held up in some Hawaiian hotel, and not once had Tito contacted him for a visit. Nothing. Nada. Nil. Nichts. As a matter of fact, the entire time he was in Hawai'i.. his phone was off.
I came to the conclusion that the fucker lied. He had come to Hawai'i under false pretenses, so that he could get my celibate ass to bang him. I ended up wigging out on him and telling him to get the hell out. He didn't. He remained. This is where you tell me "Why didn't you call the police!" BECAUSE! I was a creeped out young woman, who had invited this man to stay in her home, and when he turned out to be fucking Hannibal Lector, I totally lost all rationality and had NO IDEA what to do!
I ended up locking myself in my room for the remaining 3 days, and giving him my car keys under the pretense that he was NOT ALLOWED to be in my home while I was there. When he finally left I laughed so hard at the entire situation that I think I even went a little crazy. Have I said "Creepy" enough in this post? CREEEEPPPPYYYYY!!!!%$#^$
I was sure the guy was going to disappear off the face of the earth. I was positive he was going to email me, filled with shame and disgrace. I was 100% fucking convinced that this person would be apologetic for bringing his crazy ass to Hawai'i and disrupting my tranquil environment.
Instead I found out that he had gone through my mail, stolen letters, read private e-mails, conversed with people under my AIM name, deleted entries from my journal, stolen documents from my home.. and had the balls to concoct a story to tell his friends, about how "crazy that Glexi-girl in Hawai'i" is. I took it like a man and never said anything to cast shadow over his integrity. I let people call me crazy and believe whatever nonsense he had said about me, not ONCE ever saying "Are you kidding me, that guy is closely related to Richard Ramirez".
That's when the Tito-victims started emailing me. That's when I realized that this person has made it his profession to con women, and that I was actually lucky, because I was SO CREEPED OUT by him from day-one that he actually felt STUPID fucking with me. But most of these women actually fall in love with him, and give him money and gifts, and plane tickets.. and when he's done with them, he simply disappears and turns into a different Tito. Tito Smith. Tito Lennon. Tito Hitler. Is his name even really Tito? It could be Bob.
Or something gay.. Chad. Tito Chad, even.
Whatever it is... it's fucking CREEEEEPY!!!!!!
I've made this post before, but I'm thinking I made it from my recently purged journal, and I can't find it! This is fucking with me in high quantities, because it really was a great post. But since I really want to be able to remember this experience, I'll type it all up again. It's worth it. And people have been asking me lately about my history with him. So I will share. :)
Recently there has been a serious influx of Tito-victims, and while my first instinct is to laugh really really reallyreallyreally hard, I am beginning to feel really bad for these women; who are apparently actually chewing up his bullshit and swallowing. Digesting, even. THEY ARE DIGESTING!
This story dates back to July 19, 2003. Yes.. I remember the date. I remember the date, because this is by far the creepiest and most horrifyingly WEIRD human being I have ever had the displeasure of meeting. And seriously, when you come across one of those, not only will you remember the date, but you'll remember the time and the smell in the air and the taste in your mouth. Everything. This person creeps me out more than midgets. And anyone who knows me knows that midgets are my "ick" thing, and I can't even look at one without going into convulsions. He's worse than that.
Tito. Tito Cardenas, right? Or is it Tito Moreno? Tito Fuentes? Tito Gonzalez? He's like 18,000,000 different Tito's, apparently. All of which are EQUALLY CREEPY!
July 19, 2003. I had made plans with Tito, who was a friend of mine via internet, to meet up that day. You see, he was going to be in town (Hawai'i) for his sister's wedding. We had become very close over AIM, and he was very supportive of my vowed year of celibacy, and really I did want to meet the man I had made such great friends with. On top of that, I offered to let him stay at my home, because I had an extra bedroom and because I thought "well he'll be with his family the whole time anyway, so at least we'll get to spend a few minutes together each day".
It was a few days before he came to visit that I got the ick-vibe. He mentioned something about his sister and fiancé fighting a lot, and he didn't know if the wedding was still going to take place. I thought it was strange that he kept updating me on the status of his sister's love affairs, as if I actually gave a shit; but then I was his wedding date, so I figured.. who knows what the hell I figured, I was sex-less I would've listened to anything at that point.
Supposedly his sister & co. were going to fly to Hawai'i the day before, to check in to the hotel, get shit situated.. do wedding things. So. Yeah. Who cares about that, it has no basis on this story whatsoever EXCEPT for that when Tito was to get on his plane he calls me and tells me that his sister is on her way back from Hawai'i, because she broke off the engagement.
Flashing Red Light Alert!!!!!!
It just seemed so odd to me. Who does that? No one does that. No one gets on a plane to Hawai'i to get married, and then promptly cancels and goes back home. No one else except Julia Roberts and Richard Gere. No one!
Alas, he told me that the fiancé was still in Hawai'i, so he wanted to come and comfort him. Be there for him. Give him huggy hugs and things. On top of that the family was going to attempt to coerce the sister into going back to Hawai'i so "all should be fine". Once again, I'm like "Drr, otay".
Bring on the Tito. I pick him up from the airport. He was creepy from the moment I met him. My whole aura was like "this fucker is weird, Glexandria." I ignored the weirdness. I do however, distinctly remember calling happy_buddha to tell him just how weird this individual was. Not only was he weird, but I swear he's a closet homosexual. Which is fine. I love the gay. But THIS particular gay kept randomly trying to make out with me! It was so fucking CUH-REEEEE-PYYYY!!
He would hover over me during all hours of the day. I was questioned when I needed to pee. He'd watch and read everything I typed on the computer. I'd come home to my shit being out of place. It was WEIRD. After a couple of days I began to notice that not once had he picked up the phone to contact his family, who was supposedly experiencing CHAOS back on the mainland, trying to convince the friggin' runaway bride to come back to Hawai'i. On top of that, this supposed fiancé was held up in some Hawaiian hotel, and not once had Tito contacted him for a visit. Nothing. Nada. Nil. Nichts. As a matter of fact, the entire time he was in Hawai'i.. his phone was off.
I came to the conclusion that the fucker lied. He had come to Hawai'i under false pretenses, so that he could get my celibate ass to bang him. I ended up wigging out on him and telling him to get the hell out. He didn't. He remained. This is where you tell me "Why didn't you call the police!" BECAUSE! I was a creeped out young woman, who had invited this man to stay in her home, and when he turned out to be fucking Hannibal Lector, I totally lost all rationality and had NO IDEA what to do!
I ended up locking myself in my room for the remaining 3 days, and giving him my car keys under the pretense that he was NOT ALLOWED to be in my home while I was there. When he finally left I laughed so hard at the entire situation that I think I even went a little crazy. Have I said "Creepy" enough in this post? CREEEEPPPPYYYYY!!!!%$#^$
I was sure the guy was going to disappear off the face of the earth. I was positive he was going to email me, filled with shame and disgrace. I was 100% fucking convinced that this person would be apologetic for bringing his crazy ass to Hawai'i and disrupting my tranquil environment.
Instead I found out that he had gone through my mail, stolen letters, read private e-mails, conversed with people under my AIM name, deleted entries from my journal, stolen documents from my home.. and had the balls to concoct a story to tell his friends, about how "crazy that Glexi-girl in Hawai'i" is. I took it like a man and never said anything to cast shadow over his integrity. I let people call me crazy and believe whatever nonsense he had said about me, not ONCE ever saying "Are you kidding me, that guy is closely related to Richard Ramirez".
That's when the Tito-victims started emailing me. That's when I realized that this person has made it his profession to con women, and that I was actually lucky, because I was SO CREEPED OUT by him from day-one that he actually felt STUPID fucking with me. But most of these women actually fall in love with him, and give him money and gifts, and plane tickets.. and when he's done with them, he simply disappears and turns into a different Tito. Tito Smith. Tito Lennon. Tito Hitler. Is his name even really Tito? It could be Bob.
Or something gay.. Chad. Tito Chad, even.
Whatever it is... it's fucking CREEEEEPY!!!!!!