No porn + retardation = happiness (somehow)
There is actually no porn; something must be wrong. Except not and I don't care either way because I'm still super-excited about my hair. LOLFAIL .
Wordcount: 470
The first time Yamamoto had tried to use one of his pick-up lines (the ones his baseball team mates had taught him could never fail), Gokudera had punched him in the face.
"Baby, you're so hot-" was as far as he'd gotten before Gokudera put a preemptive stop to it.
Since then, Gokudera had had to suffer through a multitude of horrible pick-up lines.
He tried to ignore them at first, to just walk past Yamamoto as he leaned on the nearest wall in a pathetic attempt at suaveness and said things like, "You're so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine" or "What time do you get off? Can I watch?"
Of course, it didn't last long. He'd never been one to ignore irritations, preferring to deal with them immediately. So when Yamamoto told him, "That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too," he vowed to never wear the shirt again (he'd burn it when he got home) and the next morning Yamamoto earned an elbow to his nose when he tried to sling an arm around Gokudera's shoulders.
When Yamamoto tried, "Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?" Gokudera made sure to frown for the rest of the day, even though the Tenth seemed rather jumpy and probably needed reassurance from his right hand man.
And, "My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?" simply got him a traditional swift kick to the groin.
He somehow managed to keep from maiming or killing the moron by telling himself each time that it would make the Tenth upset. So he restricted himself to bruising Yamamoto anywhere that could be covered by a shirt or pants. The baseball moron should have been in too much pain to even walk after dropping all those horrible lines, but he was too goddamn stubborn to give up. The idiot was persistent, Gokudera would give him that.
But when Yamamoto told him, "First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button," Gokudera finally snapped. He whirled, furious, and brought his knee up sharply into Yamamoto's gut.
"You stupid idiot," he seethed, "I'm not a fucking girl!"
"Hm? H-Ha ha ha, Gokudera what are you talking about? Of course you aren't!" Gokudera noted the breathless quality of his voice, satisfied with the way he winced and hunched over his stomach in obvious pain.
"Then why did you just-" Gokudera cut off there, because obviously Yamamoto had some sort of barrier of retardation that kept him from being even remotely intelligible. Instead he rolled his eyes and snorted, fed up, tugging Yamamoto towards him with his shirt and kissing him hard to shut him up.
Wordcount: 470
The first time Yamamoto had tried to use one of his pick-up lines (the ones his baseball team mates had taught him could never fail), Gokudera had punched him in the face.
"Baby, you're so hot-" was as far as he'd gotten before Gokudera put a preemptive stop to it.
Since then, Gokudera had had to suffer through a multitude of horrible pick-up lines.
He tried to ignore them at first, to just walk past Yamamoto as he leaned on the nearest wall in a pathetic attempt at suaveness and said things like, "You're so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine" or "What time do you get off? Can I watch?"
Of course, it didn't last long. He'd never been one to ignore irritations, preferring to deal with them immediately. So when Yamamoto told him, "That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too," he vowed to never wear the shirt again (he'd burn it when he got home) and the next morning Yamamoto earned an elbow to his nose when he tried to sling an arm around Gokudera's shoulders.
When Yamamoto tried, "Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?" Gokudera made sure to frown for the rest of the day, even though the Tenth seemed rather jumpy and probably needed reassurance from his right hand man.
And, "My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?" simply got him a traditional swift kick to the groin.
He somehow managed to keep from maiming or killing the moron by telling himself each time that it would make the Tenth upset. So he restricted himself to bruising Yamamoto anywhere that could be covered by a shirt or pants. The baseball moron should have been in too much pain to even walk after dropping all those horrible lines, but he was too goddamn stubborn to give up. The idiot was persistent, Gokudera would give him that.
But when Yamamoto told him, "First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button," Gokudera finally snapped. He whirled, furious, and brought his knee up sharply into Yamamoto's gut.
"You stupid idiot," he seethed, "I'm not a fucking girl!"
"Hm? H-Ha ha ha, Gokudera what are you talking about? Of course you aren't!" Gokudera noted the breathless quality of his voice, satisfied with the way he winced and hunched over his stomach in obvious pain.
"Then why did you just-" Gokudera cut off there, because obviously Yamamoto had some sort of barrier of retardation that kept him from being even remotely intelligible. Instead he rolled his eyes and snorted, fed up, tugging Yamamoto towards him with his shirt and kissing him hard to shut him up.