erratic decisioning, blinding vision, and wacky reunions.
I've started reading books again, it's been a bittersweet eye meets paper reunion, but I'm in for a new crop of amazing, I guess. It has given me a lot of thought to what my fictional memoir will entail, but honestly the down to business of writing it scares the shit out of me. Will it be any good? Would anybody publish me? I don't care about selling the crap out of book(s) [pretty sure I can't put everything into one 100 paged paper/hardback]
Once I get home from Michigan, I'm enrolling into cosmetology school. What's one year of staying on the Coast and learning the tricks of the hair trade? I would like to get as much practice as I can and then decide a good state in the Northern East part of the US into broadcasting schools. I don't care how much money I end up making while in out I want my education. I'll be 27 in a few months, and although I have a lot of college background to show forth I'd still like to find my own inner way of making myself inevitably happier.
My fingertips are numb from playing on my guitar, and my eyes feel heavy from all the Red Bull I consumed today. I got up around 4something in the morning an ended up watching some b film on one of the movie channels. Colby was the school mentioned.. I love that school, too bad it is too pricey for me! Maybe Wellesley is higher?
In six days two things will happen.
1. An old friend's 25th birthday. I haven't spoken to her in over six months though. For her better judgment, good reasoning and decision making. Other than losing family members and random friends along the way, I don't believe I've ever missed someone so much in my life. I just don't really know a way of saying how I feel instead of just leaving it 'alone'. I wrote her a letter, but the mail came back.. nothing like Forrest Gump writing Jenny and all returned letters coming back unread..just a wrong address. I know where she resides I'm just not that ballsy. I'd feel like an idiot. I once did that to an ex-boyfriend, and while in out I thought it was a good idea.. boy, was I mistaken. It was the worst decision ever. Just made me look crazier than I appeared. Oh, the people that come in an out of our lives..
2. The measuring tape has drifted six years long. My brother has been gone for about that long come August 23, 2010. It doesn't quite feel like it happened yesterday, but only that I've become more resilient to death and loss. Even though it's only been five months since I lost my father, it feels like ten years. I miss them both very much, but its hard to explain to pretty much anybody. Here and there people still ask me how, what, when, where and it bothers me sometimes.. aneurism and alcohol, kids! brother and pops.
I'm reading this memoir by Rob Sheffield "Talking to girls about Duran Duran" and, honestly I feel like Rob has taken a few insights from me. The first two chapters I found myself wanting to yell out saying "You took that from me!" I guess we both have shared the likeness of a weird and derived childhood sense of humor about music.
I've been living in Ocean Springs, for the past two months. I seem to be fairly happy with the people that I've secluded myself away from and put myself into puzzle pieces fitting perfectly with shaped-minded individuals. Annie is leaving for Memphis today. I grew up with her brother; Ian in the midst of middle childhood times. Her family has graciously adopted me in ways that my family could never touch base with. Onto with Harley. Its great, because even though we are totally platonic, EVERYBODY seems to think otherwise.. It makes me laugh, honestly. I deviated from original plans to conserve our union in marriage come April Fools 2011. It's going to be fucking hilarious.. especially to all of our ghastly pals. Oh, this economy.. how have I survived this long without a job? Man it gets old. For once, I'd love to come home to achy ankles and tired pauses instead of jibber jabber.
Once I get home from Michigan, I'm enrolling into cosmetology school. What's one year of staying on the Coast and learning the tricks of the hair trade? I would like to get as much practice as I can and then decide a good state in the Northern East part of the US into broadcasting schools. I don't care how much money I end up making while in out I want my education. I'll be 27 in a few months, and although I have a lot of college background to show forth I'd still like to find my own inner way of making myself inevitably happier.
My fingertips are numb from playing on my guitar, and my eyes feel heavy from all the Red Bull I consumed today. I got up around 4something in the morning an ended up watching some b film on one of the movie channels. Colby was the school mentioned.. I love that school, too bad it is too pricey for me! Maybe Wellesley is higher?
In six days two things will happen.
1. An old friend's 25th birthday. I haven't spoken to her in over six months though. For her better judgment, good reasoning and decision making. Other than losing family members and random friends along the way, I don't believe I've ever missed someone so much in my life. I just don't really know a way of saying how I feel instead of just leaving it 'alone'. I wrote her a letter, but the mail came back.. nothing like Forrest Gump writing Jenny and all returned letters coming back unread..just a wrong address. I know where she resides I'm just not that ballsy. I'd feel like an idiot. I once did that to an ex-boyfriend, and while in out I thought it was a good idea.. boy, was I mistaken. It was the worst decision ever. Just made me look crazier than I appeared. Oh, the people that come in an out of our lives..
2. The measuring tape has drifted six years long. My brother has been gone for about that long come August 23, 2010. It doesn't quite feel like it happened yesterday, but only that I've become more resilient to death and loss. Even though it's only been five months since I lost my father, it feels like ten years. I miss them both very much, but its hard to explain to pretty much anybody. Here and there people still ask me how, what, when, where and it bothers me sometimes.. aneurism and alcohol, kids! brother and pops.
I'm reading this memoir by Rob Sheffield "Talking to girls about Duran Duran" and, honestly I feel like Rob has taken a few insights from me. The first two chapters I found myself wanting to yell out saying "You took that from me!" I guess we both have shared the likeness of a weird and derived childhood sense of humor about music.
I've been living in Ocean Springs, for the past two months. I seem to be fairly happy with the people that I've secluded myself away from and put myself into puzzle pieces fitting perfectly with shaped-minded individuals. Annie is leaving for Memphis today. I grew up with her brother; Ian in the midst of middle childhood times. Her family has graciously adopted me in ways that my family could never touch base with. Onto with Harley. Its great, because even though we are totally platonic, EVERYBODY seems to think otherwise.. It makes me laugh, honestly. I deviated from original plans to conserve our union in marriage come April Fools 2011. It's going to be fucking hilarious.. especially to all of our ghastly pals. Oh, this economy.. how have I survived this long without a job? Man it gets old. For once, I'd love to come home to achy ankles and tired pauses instead of jibber jabber.