Thought I'd share
Kent and I finally sat down to work on the ceremony. Originally, I thought we'd be constructing something largely from scratch, but reading the samples sent to us by our officiant kind of knocked the wind out of that idea. The emphasis on the communities of family and friends that we all live in, the idea that "I do" doesn't magically create a relationship that wasn't already there, none of the icky "one man one woman" rhetoric--it was all already there.
So, here's what we have thus far. It doesn't incorporate the elements of our ring warming yet because we're debating a few specifics.
Gathering Words
We, who have gathered here today, are privileged to witness and to participate in a ceremony celebrating the love of which Kent and Loraine have for each other, knowing that by our presence here with them, we are saying that they, together, are loved by many others. This is a special moment in the development of their love. Through their love for one another their lives have become richer and fuller and they are both made stronger. Having found one another and established their relationship, they have come here to sanctify it and give it significance by celebrating it here with family and friends.
Support from Families and Friends
As these two people join together in marriage, they ask for the support and love of not only their families, but their friends as well. On this day, they ask that you be more than only friends of Kent or friends of Loraine. They ask that you recognize their special union and welcome them both as friends in your lives.
Who stands with this couple in support and blessing of this marriage? [“We do”] (All present)
This ceremony is not magic. It will not create a relationship that does not already exist. It is a time for tying a knot in the rope of days and saying - We will not slip backward from here, but will go forward together. It is a time for declaring vows and intentions, and for facing the uncertainties of the future with one thing of which they are certain; their love for one another and their desire for that love to last forever.
First Reading
Intentions
Kent and Loraine you are here before us, your family and friends, to affirm your choice that you have made of each other as life’s mate. By standing here before us, you affirm that it is your intention to establish a life together on the foundation of your love. Out of a tangled world you have been drawn together. I ask you now to face one another, join hands, and declare your intentions.
Vows
Kent, please repeat after me:
I, Kent, take you, Loraine, as my wife, friend, and love, in laughter and in tears, in conflict and tranquility, asking that you be no other than yourself, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my heart to keep.
Loraine, please repeat after me:
I, Loraine, take you, Kent, as my husband, friend and love, in laugher and in tears, in conflict and tranquility, asking that you be no other than yourself, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my heart to keep.
Promises
Do you, Kent, promise to love and respect, Loraine, to share your life and your dreams, to build with her a home that is a place of love, happiness, and growth? [“I do”]
Do you promise to be a companion to her in all of her successes and failures, her happiness and sadness, to always give to her the best of yourself? [“I do”]
Do you, Loraine, promise to love and respect, Kent, to share your life and your dreams, to build with him a home that is a place of love, happiness, and growth? [“I do”]
Do you promise to be a companion to him in all of his successes and failures, his happiness and sadness, to always give to him the best of yourself? [“I do”]
Second Reading
The Rings
[The rings please]
Though we have heard the vows which have been shared by Kent and Loraine, words, once spoken, are carried away on the wind. Therefore, the wedding ring is a visible symbol of the promises made here today.
These rings mark the beginning of a new journey together, one filled with wonder, surprise, laughter, tears, celebration, sorrow, and joy. May these rings be to each of you a sign and a seal of the promises you have made to each other today.
Kent, please place the ring on Loraine’s finger and repeat after me.
I give you this ring to wear
As a symbol of my abiding love,
My eternal faith,
And the belief that I was chosen
To live my life with you.
Loraine, please place the ring on Kent’s finger and repeat after me.
I give you this ring to wear
As a symbol of my abiding love,
My eternal faith,
And the belief that I was chosen
To live my life with you.
Blessing and Pronouncement
Kent and Loraine, you have heard the words about love and marriage, have exchanged your vows and made your promises, and celebrated your union with the giving and receiving of rings. I now offer you the words of poet Carmen Bugan.
In the village where I was born, we wish
A house of stone to shelter the heart of the marriage
So here too, I wish you
Obstinate, strong love, unyielding and unending.
May you be in reach of each other when all seems lost,
May your tears and your smiles happen always face to face.
When you imagine that you have shared everything
May you know that you still have the rest of your lives
To do all of it again and again.
But now listen to the hurry of bells and
Look how petals of roses about the vineyard
Bring you the words husband and wife:
First words in your house of stone.
It is at this time that I pronounce you husband and wife.
Kent, you may now kiss your bride!
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Kent and Loraine, husband and wife!
And now we wait for feedback from our officiant.
So, here's what we have thus far. It doesn't incorporate the elements of our ring warming yet because we're debating a few specifics.
Gathering Words
We, who have gathered here today, are privileged to witness and to participate in a ceremony celebrating the love of which Kent and Loraine have for each other, knowing that by our presence here with them, we are saying that they, together, are loved by many others. This is a special moment in the development of their love. Through their love for one another their lives have become richer and fuller and they are both made stronger. Having found one another and established their relationship, they have come here to sanctify it and give it significance by celebrating it here with family and friends.
Support from Families and Friends
As these two people join together in marriage, they ask for the support and love of not only their families, but their friends as well. On this day, they ask that you be more than only friends of Kent or friends of Loraine. They ask that you recognize their special union and welcome them both as friends in your lives.
Who stands with this couple in support and blessing of this marriage? [“We do”] (All present)
This ceremony is not magic. It will not create a relationship that does not already exist. It is a time for tying a knot in the rope of days and saying - We will not slip backward from here, but will go forward together. It is a time for declaring vows and intentions, and for facing the uncertainties of the future with one thing of which they are certain; their love for one another and their desire for that love to last forever.
First Reading
Intentions
Kent and Loraine you are here before us, your family and friends, to affirm your choice that you have made of each other as life’s mate. By standing here before us, you affirm that it is your intention to establish a life together on the foundation of your love. Out of a tangled world you have been drawn together. I ask you now to face one another, join hands, and declare your intentions.
Vows
Kent, please repeat after me:
I, Kent, take you, Loraine, as my wife, friend, and love, in laughter and in tears, in conflict and tranquility, asking that you be no other than yourself, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my heart to keep.
Loraine, please repeat after me:
I, Loraine, take you, Kent, as my husband, friend and love, in laugher and in tears, in conflict and tranquility, asking that you be no other than yourself, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my heart to keep.
Promises
Do you, Kent, promise to love and respect, Loraine, to share your life and your dreams, to build with her a home that is a place of love, happiness, and growth? [“I do”]
Do you promise to be a companion to her in all of her successes and failures, her happiness and sadness, to always give to her the best of yourself? [“I do”]
Do you, Loraine, promise to love and respect, Kent, to share your life and your dreams, to build with him a home that is a place of love, happiness, and growth? [“I do”]
Do you promise to be a companion to him in all of his successes and failures, his happiness and sadness, to always give to him the best of yourself? [“I do”]
Second Reading
The Rings
[The rings please]
Though we have heard the vows which have been shared by Kent and Loraine, words, once spoken, are carried away on the wind. Therefore, the wedding ring is a visible symbol of the promises made here today.
These rings mark the beginning of a new journey together, one filled with wonder, surprise, laughter, tears, celebration, sorrow, and joy. May these rings be to each of you a sign and a seal of the promises you have made to each other today.
Kent, please place the ring on Loraine’s finger and repeat after me.
I give you this ring to wear
As a symbol of my abiding love,
My eternal faith,
And the belief that I was chosen
To live my life with you.
Loraine, please place the ring on Kent’s finger and repeat after me.
I give you this ring to wear
As a symbol of my abiding love,
My eternal faith,
And the belief that I was chosen
To live my life with you.
Blessing and Pronouncement
Kent and Loraine, you have heard the words about love and marriage, have exchanged your vows and made your promises, and celebrated your union with the giving and receiving of rings. I now offer you the words of poet Carmen Bugan.
In the village where I was born, we wish
A house of stone to shelter the heart of the marriage
So here too, I wish you
Obstinate, strong love, unyielding and unending.
May you be in reach of each other when all seems lost,
May your tears and your smiles happen always face to face.
When you imagine that you have shared everything
May you know that you still have the rest of your lives
To do all of it again and again.
But now listen to the hurry of bells and
Look how petals of roses about the vineyard
Bring you the words husband and wife:
First words in your house of stone.
It is at this time that I pronounce you husband and wife.
Kent, you may now kiss your bride!
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Kent and Loraine, husband and wife!
And now we wait for feedback from our officiant.