"Who'd have thunk that love could be so caffeinated?!"
Me: (upon running into someone I used to hang out with high school while hopping about town hanging up posters) Wow! Hey, what've you been up to?
Lisa: Oh, not much. Planning Andrea's wedding. And mine.
Me: Oh, so, uh, you're, uh, getting married too, eh?
Lisa: Yeah!
Me: Oh. Well, um, congrat..u..lat..ions.
---
That's three girls from my highschool class getting married this summer, and one of those girls already has a child. Not just from my highschool class, but who I used to hang out with at one time or another. When hearing htese announcements, I'm still just as dismayed as I ever was, but in a completely different way. We are young, we are free! Let's learn to live life independently and free of attachments and enjoy ourselves before latching on to another person! I know that I personally, even if I were attached at the moment, could never be considering something like marriage...I need to have far more exciting and exotic experiences in my lifetime before I can feel comfortable settling down and sharing that lifetime with another individual.
It's so weird to be on the side of the fence that I'm on now. Up to this point, a part of me has always considered myself more mature than my peers. Not all of my peers, but there was always this nagging sense taht I was more grown up. Maybe it was just a superiority complex. But coming back here has completely changed all of that. My mind is on runnign away from the world and how I want to stay in residence forever and never grow up, while those who stayed here instead of going away to school and getting jobs, getting married, and settling down. It's not that I want to do those things right now, or that I think that it's a better lifestyle than mine, but it's weird to see people presenting either professional or family-oriented personas while I want to crack jokes and sing and dance. No matter which way you slice it, I'm no longer the grown-up one. I may be self-aware, but I'm not grown-up. They've left adolescence behind and started this grown-up lives and it's almost like they're settling. I don't want to settle, but it is still unbelievably strange, as if I am viewing the world from within a bubble, and in that bubble, time has stopped. They are all moving on, and I am within my bubble, in some strange young-adult time warp while they grow up around me.
Other notes of import:
-I am in love with this song, which is about falling in love with a barista.
-I may move. Not homes, journals. I have a new Vox account that is getting some use. It may be too much of a pain to move everything over, and it still has a lot of bugs and lack of features, but the interface is slick and I love adding my photos and books. This probably just means posts spread out at both places for the moment, but Vox is still worth a look. (And if you want to try it out, email me, and I'll see when I get an invite. :) )
-contacts are turning painful, and just when my third pair of sunglasses arrived!
-why can I not find black construction paper anymore? This is a conspiracy against my actually getting anything RAish done before training.
Lisa: Oh, not much. Planning Andrea's wedding. And mine.
Me: Oh, so, uh, you're, uh, getting married too, eh?
Lisa: Yeah!
Me: Oh. Well, um, congrat..u..lat..ions.
---
That's three girls from my highschool class getting married this summer, and one of those girls already has a child. Not just from my highschool class, but who I used to hang out with at one time or another. When hearing htese announcements, I'm still just as dismayed as I ever was, but in a completely different way. We are young, we are free! Let's learn to live life independently and free of attachments and enjoy ourselves before latching on to another person! I know that I personally, even if I were attached at the moment, could never be considering something like marriage...I need to have far more exciting and exotic experiences in my lifetime before I can feel comfortable settling down and sharing that lifetime with another individual.
It's so weird to be on the side of the fence that I'm on now. Up to this point, a part of me has always considered myself more mature than my peers. Not all of my peers, but there was always this nagging sense taht I was more grown up. Maybe it was just a superiority complex. But coming back here has completely changed all of that. My mind is on runnign away from the world and how I want to stay in residence forever and never grow up, while those who stayed here instead of going away to school and getting jobs, getting married, and settling down. It's not that I want to do those things right now, or that I think that it's a better lifestyle than mine, but it's weird to see people presenting either professional or family-oriented personas while I want to crack jokes and sing and dance. No matter which way you slice it, I'm no longer the grown-up one. I may be self-aware, but I'm not grown-up. They've left adolescence behind and started this grown-up lives and it's almost like they're settling. I don't want to settle, but it is still unbelievably strange, as if I am viewing the world from within a bubble, and in that bubble, time has stopped. They are all moving on, and I am within my bubble, in some strange young-adult time warp while they grow up around me.
Other notes of import:
-I am in love with this song, which is about falling in love with a barista.
-I may move. Not homes, journals. I have a new Vox account that is getting some use. It may be too much of a pain to move everything over, and it still has a lot of bugs and lack of features, but the interface is slick and I love adding my photos and books. This probably just means posts spread out at both places for the moment, but Vox is still worth a look. (And if you want to try it out, email me, and I'll see when I get an invite. :) )
-contacts are turning painful, and just when my third pair of sunglasses arrived!
-why can I not find black construction paper anymore? This is a conspiracy against my actually getting anything RAish done before training.