Gaslighting the job search
I have been accused of not showing up for a job interview that somebody arranged for me.
Not directly, of course, not to my face, but
...
Let me back up.
My Sweetie practices martial arts at a small independent dojo run by a man who is an experienced teacher in the local school division to where we live. When I first graduated he gave me some good advice, much of it specific to that district, he offered to stand as one of my professional references, and he promised to put in a good word for me with any of the principals that he knew who were hiring.
Sure enough, it wasn't long before I got my first interview. It was a maternity leave, covering a French immersion grade 3 class for one year. It was my first teaching job interview, I was terrified, didn't know what to expect, didn't know how to read the situation, I went in pretty blind. I did the interview, went home, never heard anything further on the subject. It is only recently that it occurred to me that that was odd.
Literally every job interview I've done, after that first one, somebody has given me a call back, just to let me know that they decided to go with another applicant. At first I thought that was a very nice courtesy to be told that, it's only recently that I've realized that that is the norm. That is how it is done. If an applicant gets to the interview stage of the process, they get that courtesy call to let them know they didn't get the job.
My Sweetie and I have been arguing a lot about finances recently, and yesterday, in the course of one of those arguments, he pointed out that I had clearly not really been trying to get a teaching job, because Sensei said I had not shown up for the second interview he got me. This brought me up short. What second interview?
The bottom line is, I have never not gone to a job interview that I knew about. And although I know that Sensei believed that My Sweetie and I were not a good match, I don't believe that he would say something like that unless it were true, as far as he knew. So I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out where the disconnect is.
I keep coming back to that first job interview. I know for sure that Sensei got me that interview, because I never saw that job posted, I never applied for it, but I got an interview. And as I've already explained, I didn't realize at the time that never hearing back either way after a teaching interview was strange. So the only thing I can think of is that there was some sort of voicemail snafu.
I was shortlisted for a second interview, they called to set it up and no one was home, A message was left, asking me to call and set up a second interview, and somehow I never got that message. When I never called back, they concluded that I wasn't serious and moved on. It bears mentioning that I never got another interview from any school in my home division after that. I have had interviews in several of the nearby rural districts, but that one was the only interview I was ever granted in my hometown.
Suddenly that makes a lot more sense.
Not directly, of course, not to my face, but
...
Let me back up.
My Sweetie practices martial arts at a small independent dojo run by a man who is an experienced teacher in the local school division to where we live. When I first graduated he gave me some good advice, much of it specific to that district, he offered to stand as one of my professional references, and he promised to put in a good word for me with any of the principals that he knew who were hiring.
Sure enough, it wasn't long before I got my first interview. It was a maternity leave, covering a French immersion grade 3 class for one year. It was my first teaching job interview, I was terrified, didn't know what to expect, didn't know how to read the situation, I went in pretty blind. I did the interview, went home, never heard anything further on the subject. It is only recently that it occurred to me that that was odd.
Literally every job interview I've done, after that first one, somebody has given me a call back, just to let me know that they decided to go with another applicant. At first I thought that was a very nice courtesy to be told that, it's only recently that I've realized that that is the norm. That is how it is done. If an applicant gets to the interview stage of the process, they get that courtesy call to let them know they didn't get the job.
My Sweetie and I have been arguing a lot about finances recently, and yesterday, in the course of one of those arguments, he pointed out that I had clearly not really been trying to get a teaching job, because Sensei said I had not shown up for the second interview he got me. This brought me up short. What second interview?
The bottom line is, I have never not gone to a job interview that I knew about. And although I know that Sensei believed that My Sweetie and I were not a good match, I don't believe that he would say something like that unless it were true, as far as he knew. So I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out where the disconnect is.
I keep coming back to that first job interview. I know for sure that Sensei got me that interview, because I never saw that job posted, I never applied for it, but I got an interview. And as I've already explained, I didn't realize at the time that never hearing back either way after a teaching interview was strange. So the only thing I can think of is that there was some sort of voicemail snafu.
I was shortlisted for a second interview, they called to set it up and no one was home, A message was left, asking me to call and set up a second interview, and somehow I never got that message. When I never called back, they concluded that I wasn't serious and moved on. It bears mentioning that I never got another interview from any school in my home division after that. I have had interviews in several of the nearby rural districts, but that one was the only interview I was ever granted in my hometown.
Suddenly that makes a lot more sense.