I hate you too, universe. Now kindly stop screwing me over?
So I dared to step foot in the costume shop again today for the first time since April. And I wasn't even in there for five whole minutes before all of the old resentment came back full force.
It's not helped by the fact that I've just had a generally bad day. Somehow my bank ended up charging me over $100 in overdraft fees, even though I was obsessively checking my bank account balance last week to make sure that DIDN'T happen. And of course the cheapskates won't give me back the money. Why would they? It's not like they work for it or anything. I'm changing banks on Monday, I don't give a flying piece of crap WHERE I change to as long as it isn't Bank of America.
I was up until 7am working on cosplay, but that was actually pretty fun. I can't remember the last time I've watched the sun rise, and I really did get a lot accomplished, so overall stay up that late was pretty awesome. What wasn't so awesome were the friggin construction workers slamming ladders into the building at 10:30 am. I thought they were gonna break my window! Not cool, construction workers. Tadpole Jackson is right by my window. They stab my tadpole, they DIE.
So, yeah. Low sleep, low account balance, low self esteem and just generally low mood. So when I went to the costume shop to offer my help to my Ranfan so she would be able to actually go to AWA on time and not have to miss Friday ENTIRELY, they turned me away. WTF?
I worked for that costume shop for two and a half years, half of that was UNPAID VOLUNTEER WORK. I constantly demonstrated my willingness to learn, I worked my ass off for them, I bent over backwards. And they constantly gave me shit jobs and made me feel bad about my sewing abilities, my choice of majors, and my intended career goals. Looking back on that, that's probably borderline mental abuse no matter how you look at it. I spent MONTHS depressed because they didn't think I was good enough to do more than pull out lining and sew on buttons. MONTHS.
They are understaffed and within a week of the opening of their first show, and they wouldn't even let me HELP. For FREE. They know I'm capable. I figured they would have jumped on the chance to have some help, especially help that's actually RELIABLE. But noooo. Now I remember why I resented them all so much. Why I don't want to ever set foot in that costume shop again.
Now I'm about to grab a bunch of my old video games and try to sell them to Gamestop. Hopefully I'll get more than $1 for some of them. I'm gonna miss some of them - I may back out on selling Phantom Brave, at least. I mean, I don't really play video games any more, though that may also be because I've been in cosplay-cons-sleep mode since last February with few breaks, too.
I'm gonna try really, really hard not to let any of this effect my AWA. I'll wear this stupid cheerful mask until it's not a mask any more, dammit. I'm so close to being finished with my costumes, I can taste it. I just had to take some time to get all this down, because it was honestly bugging me.
It's not helped by the fact that I've just had a generally bad day. Somehow my bank ended up charging me over $100 in overdraft fees, even though I was obsessively checking my bank account balance last week to make sure that DIDN'T happen. And of course the cheapskates won't give me back the money. Why would they? It's not like they work for it or anything. I'm changing banks on Monday, I don't give a flying piece of crap WHERE I change to as long as it isn't Bank of America.
I was up until 7am working on cosplay, but that was actually pretty fun. I can't remember the last time I've watched the sun rise, and I really did get a lot accomplished, so overall stay up that late was pretty awesome. What wasn't so awesome were the friggin construction workers slamming ladders into the building at 10:30 am. I thought they were gonna break my window! Not cool, construction workers. Tadpole Jackson is right by my window. They stab my tadpole, they DIE.
So, yeah. Low sleep, low account balance, low self esteem and just generally low mood. So when I went to the costume shop to offer my help to my Ranfan so she would be able to actually go to AWA on time and not have to miss Friday ENTIRELY, they turned me away. WTF?
I worked for that costume shop for two and a half years, half of that was UNPAID VOLUNTEER WORK. I constantly demonstrated my willingness to learn, I worked my ass off for them, I bent over backwards. And they constantly gave me shit jobs and made me feel bad about my sewing abilities, my choice of majors, and my intended career goals. Looking back on that, that's probably borderline mental abuse no matter how you look at it. I spent MONTHS depressed because they didn't think I was good enough to do more than pull out lining and sew on buttons. MONTHS.
They are understaffed and within a week of the opening of their first show, and they wouldn't even let me HELP. For FREE. They know I'm capable. I figured they would have jumped on the chance to have some help, especially help that's actually RELIABLE. But noooo. Now I remember why I resented them all so much. Why I don't want to ever set foot in that costume shop again.
Now I'm about to grab a bunch of my old video games and try to sell them to Gamestop. Hopefully I'll get more than $1 for some of them. I'm gonna miss some of them - I may back out on selling Phantom Brave, at least. I mean, I don't really play video games any more, though that may also be because I've been in cosplay-cons-sleep mode since last February with few breaks, too.
I'm gonna try really, really hard not to let any of this effect my AWA. I'll wear this stupid cheerful mask until it's not a mask any more, dammit. I'm so close to being finished with my costumes, I can taste it. I just had to take some time to get all this down, because it was honestly bugging me.