[TM] 233 - Talk Show Host At The Door
“Arthur Tiberius Jackson, put him down this instant!”
“He’s fine.”
“Art, you’re holding him two feet off the ground by his neck! Put him down, for the love of God!”
“...you, toots, not God.”
“Sonufa...gonna...sue...”
“Sue? Press charges? Fat lot of good that’ll do ya, Donnely.”
“Arthur, you’re...your fangs are out again.”
“So what? Dave Donnely ain’t no talk show host, he’s a leech. And two gets you seven he also has a telepath nearby, snooping. How the hell else did he show up at the door not two seconds after you proposed?”
“Well I don’t know, Art!”
“You certainly do, you’re looking for him. Don’t think I didn’t see you cast that charm, Angel.”
“I did no such thing!”
“You did, too, I saw your lips move. You cast a charm, then you hexed Dave here. Look at him! That shade of red in flesh just ain’t natural.”
“You were strangling the poor man!”
“Maybe, sweetheart, but the last time I saw that touch of scarlet, it was on the red foam nose of some poor shulb handing out balloons at Wal-Mart.”
“Of all the nerve!! Oh, I’m so mad at you I could spit!”
“Then spit. Angel, in two seconds I’m gonna cold-cock this son of a bitch. Again. Then I’m tossing him out the door, alive, calling the station, and having his sorry ass arrested and his stupid morning show cancelled. Now if you have a merciful bone in you, and I know you got several, turn him back the right color, and let me get his ass beat nice and legal so I can go and tell the world that I’m marrying my best girl again, before he gets to do it first.”
“You’re going to jail...”
“Shut it, Donnely! Gail?...”
“...let my power be undone.”
“Good girl...there, that’s a nice healthy color again. Okay, bub...out you go!”
“Arthur, wait!”
*SMACK* *thud*
“Holy mother of God...”
“I am so sorry...”
“No...no, don’t be. I just...Jesus, I knew you could throw a punch, Gail, but I haven’t seen you knock a man out since Jacobs in Homicide pinched your fanny at the ‘61 Christmas party...”
Muse: Artie Jackson
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 378
“He’s fine.”
“Art, you’re holding him two feet off the ground by his neck! Put him down, for the love of God!”
“...you, toots, not God.”
“Sonufa...gonna...sue...”
“Sue? Press charges? Fat lot of good that’ll do ya, Donnely.”
“Arthur, you’re...your fangs are out again.”
“So what? Dave Donnely ain’t no talk show host, he’s a leech. And two gets you seven he also has a telepath nearby, snooping. How the hell else did he show up at the door not two seconds after you proposed?”
“Well I don’t know, Art!”
“You certainly do, you’re looking for him. Don’t think I didn’t see you cast that charm, Angel.”
“I did no such thing!”
“You did, too, I saw your lips move. You cast a charm, then you hexed Dave here. Look at him! That shade of red in flesh just ain’t natural.”
“You were strangling the poor man!”
“Maybe, sweetheart, but the last time I saw that touch of scarlet, it was on the red foam nose of some poor shulb handing out balloons at Wal-Mart.”
“Of all the nerve!! Oh, I’m so mad at you I could spit!”
“Then spit. Angel, in two seconds I’m gonna cold-cock this son of a bitch. Again. Then I’m tossing him out the door, alive, calling the station, and having his sorry ass arrested and his stupid morning show cancelled. Now if you have a merciful bone in you, and I know you got several, turn him back the right color, and let me get his ass beat nice and legal so I can go and tell the world that I’m marrying my best girl again, before he gets to do it first.”
“You’re going to jail...”
“Shut it, Donnely! Gail?...”
“...let my power be undone.”
“Good girl...there, that’s a nice healthy color again. Okay, bub...out you go!”
“Arthur, wait!”
*SMACK* *thud*
“Holy mother of God...”
“I am so sorry...”
“No...no, don’t be. I just...Jesus, I knew you could throw a punch, Gail, but I haven’t seen you knock a man out since Jacobs in Homicide pinched your fanny at the ‘61 Christmas party...”
Muse: Artie Jackson
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 378