The Ex's...
Ken posted this and I avoided it like the plague but I thought maybe I should as it seems to clarify...be a bit cleansing. So here ya go. I brought back two pics for you Ken. Damn...this shit is not easy!
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Ex 1's Name: Bob
Best Picture of you two: I'm posting 2. Seeing as he's my only ex I think its allowed. Well that and I'm a photog so I can't pick just one. I'll post everyone else's fav of us and the one that was my fav.
The popular:
My fav:
How Long Were You Together: Just over 11 months..kinda hard to determine as it was over before the day it was officially over. I broke up with him then he re-upped my break up and then I responded so who knows?
Name a few good memories: Rothbury, DAVE concerts, Jack Johnson and Mike Doughty concerts, Camping, fishing, dinners with his parents, BBQ's and of course the falling asleep on him. First and only guy I enjoyed that/was comfortable with.
What were your first thoughts when you met him / her: Wow, he's cute and has that boyish charm. He was nervous and couldn't hide being into me so it was cute.
Do you still love them to this day: Yes. People will say it'll go away b/c its only been a week but I know for a fact that part of me will always love him no matter what I end up doing/who I end up being with.
Do you miss him / her: Eh. Yes and no. I miss the good times and the little things like that falling asleep on him thing. The comfort was really nice. I don't miss the arguments or drama or hurt feelings though.
Did you ever picture yourself marrying him / her: I did yes. The only guy I ever did. We fit so well in so many ways and he felt just...right. So yeah, I'll say I did hope one day down the road it'd come to that but 8 out of 10 things right don't work when 9 & 10 are mountain high hurdles.
What was the most memorable thing given to you by your ex: Toss up between the vermont teddy bear he sent me on my birthday when he was in india...and the big elephant he spent tons of cash to win me at D&B. Other things like the fav jewelry and such mean more though.
Why did the relationship end: Well he never really gave me his reasons. He kinda just gave up and cashed out. For me...well to be brutally honest, he is a very severe alcoholic. He can't deal with the past or present so it turns out he wasn't living reality but just faking it well. Lack of communication, unwillingness to compromise/problem solve....that caused problems. So me miserable means me talking, him not dealing means unsolved problems and him running away/not talking at all = us miserable. He's not ready to deal with the addiction and I wasn't ready to watch him kill himself...rather my heart couldn't bear it. Sad but for the best in the end.
Who's fault was it: I don't blame him or hate him or any of that. I know he's a good guy but its covered by a massive problem so what to say? You can't expect someone who doesn't realize whats going on to make any logical or even emotional decisions. He feels nothing about anything so I can't answer this until he gets sober and healthy...which unfortunately may never happen. Here's to hoping it does.
What makes you think of them? Tigers baseball, Luna, oddly and unhealthily...corona and guinness, steak, eucalyptus massage oil, guys with beards or long hair, fishing, golf, india....the list goes on and on and on.
Would you ever get back together with him / her: Probably not. In order for that to happen he'd have to be completely clean and sober and get some professional help to deal with the addiction and his past. In that situation I would but all the same I'd fear relapse so trust would be hard to make genuine. Too difficult...wish it would've worked but some problems are too big to ignore/overcome with love alone. Plus should he get clean..by the time he's able to have a relationship thats normal/healthy, I will likely have moved on and be in a different part of my life.
Vent if you want to:I have no need really. I'm kinda over wanting to be with him/missing him as a bf. Once I realized it wasn't me...not my "fault" and that he wasn't an asshole or shitty to me on purpose...once I realized he has lost control...and its a disease....well I forgave in 2 days. I'm not angry, just sad. Now I just worry for him, his health and his family. I just continue to hope he will seek and get help sooner then later so he can be healthy and live life and gain the happiness we all know he deserves and seeks.
______________________________________
Ex 1's Name: Bob
Best Picture of you two: I'm posting 2. Seeing as he's my only ex I think its allowed. Well that and I'm a photog so I can't pick just one. I'll post everyone else's fav of us and the one that was my fav.
The popular:
My fav:
How Long Were You Together: Just over 11 months..kinda hard to determine as it was over before the day it was officially over. I broke up with him then he re-upped my break up and then I responded so who knows?
Name a few good memories: Rothbury, DAVE concerts, Jack Johnson and Mike Doughty concerts, Camping, fishing, dinners with his parents, BBQ's and of course the falling asleep on him. First and only guy I enjoyed that/was comfortable with.
What were your first thoughts when you met him / her: Wow, he's cute and has that boyish charm. He was nervous and couldn't hide being into me so it was cute.
Do you still love them to this day: Yes. People will say it'll go away b/c its only been a week but I know for a fact that part of me will always love him no matter what I end up doing/who I end up being with.
Do you miss him / her: Eh. Yes and no. I miss the good times and the little things like that falling asleep on him thing. The comfort was really nice. I don't miss the arguments or drama or hurt feelings though.
Did you ever picture yourself marrying him / her: I did yes. The only guy I ever did. We fit so well in so many ways and he felt just...right. So yeah, I'll say I did hope one day down the road it'd come to that but 8 out of 10 things right don't work when 9 & 10 are mountain high hurdles.
What was the most memorable thing given to you by your ex: Toss up between the vermont teddy bear he sent me on my birthday when he was in india...and the big elephant he spent tons of cash to win me at D&B. Other things like the fav jewelry and such mean more though.
Why did the relationship end: Well he never really gave me his reasons. He kinda just gave up and cashed out. For me...well to be brutally honest, he is a very severe alcoholic. He can't deal with the past or present so it turns out he wasn't living reality but just faking it well. Lack of communication, unwillingness to compromise/problem solve....that caused problems. So me miserable means me talking, him not dealing means unsolved problems and him running away/not talking at all = us miserable. He's not ready to deal with the addiction and I wasn't ready to watch him kill himself...rather my heart couldn't bear it. Sad but for the best in the end.
Who's fault was it: I don't blame him or hate him or any of that. I know he's a good guy but its covered by a massive problem so what to say? You can't expect someone who doesn't realize whats going on to make any logical or even emotional decisions. He feels nothing about anything so I can't answer this until he gets sober and healthy...which unfortunately may never happen. Here's to hoping it does.
What makes you think of them? Tigers baseball, Luna, oddly and unhealthily...corona and guinness, steak, eucalyptus massage oil, guys with beards or long hair, fishing, golf, india....the list goes on and on and on.
Would you ever get back together with him / her: Probably not. In order for that to happen he'd have to be completely clean and sober and get some professional help to deal with the addiction and his past. In that situation I would but all the same I'd fear relapse so trust would be hard to make genuine. Too difficult...wish it would've worked but some problems are too big to ignore/overcome with love alone. Plus should he get clean..by the time he's able to have a relationship thats normal/healthy, I will likely have moved on and be in a different part of my life.
Vent if you want to:I have no need really. I'm kinda over wanting to be with him/missing him as a bf. Once I realized it wasn't me...not my "fault" and that he wasn't an asshole or shitty to me on purpose...once I realized he has lost control...and its a disease....well I forgave in 2 days. I'm not angry, just sad. Now I just worry for him, his health and his family. I just continue to hope he will seek and get help sooner then later so he can be healthy and live life and gain the happiness we all know he deserves and seeks.