"Message me if you want to further your career at McDonalds, " and more in this week's installment
Yes, there is a lot more going on in my life than online dating. However, nothing makes me lunge for the blog like a Crap E-mail From A Dude. They're just so compelling. It's like a trainwreck full of clowns; you don't want to look, but you can't look away, and you don't know whether to laugh or scream. But this one really, REALLY takes the cake. Mr. Love Machine starts off with a classic pick-up... insulting my name.
Hey Little miss sarahedythe
Either you’re just using that name to hide from the police, or your parent’s were awful cruel to you. Anyway, you’ve probably gotten a few dozen e-mails from losers who are freshly divorced from their 8th wife, have 5 bratty kids, a sexy picture of an overly-hairy back on their profile, and who just got promoted to flipping burgers at McDonalds. Either that, or you’re being hit on the by the geriatrics who discovered the Internet and Metamucil at the same time and are feeling as virile as a twenty year old.
Well, I’m not going to spend too much time talking about myself, but I’m good looking, muscular, funny, exciting, adventurous, cool, a real man’s man-the kind of man other men want to be, and women want to be with! But most of all, out of everything else, my best trait is…I’m modest. ; )
So if you’re looking to further your career at McDonalds, or think that Liver Spots are really, really hot, then I’m not the guy for you. But if you want to meet up and have a great time and some great conversation, then we should get together. If you think you can handle it, that is!
Talk soon,
Tony
I'm so glad that you feel you can raise my station in life. Further my career at McDonalds! You are SO GENEROUS to spend an entire paragraph insulting me, and then make such an offer when I am obviously not worthy. Of anything. And of course attractive young men couldn't POSSIBLY be interested in me, because apparently I have a dorky name.
Hey Little miss sarahedythe
Either you’re just using that name to hide from the police, or your parent’s were awful cruel to you. Anyway, you’ve probably gotten a few dozen e-mails from losers who are freshly divorced from their 8th wife, have 5 bratty kids, a sexy picture of an overly-hairy back on their profile, and who just got promoted to flipping burgers at McDonalds. Either that, or you’re being hit on the by the geriatrics who discovered the Internet and Metamucil at the same time and are feeling as virile as a twenty year old.
Well, I’m not going to spend too much time talking about myself, but I’m good looking, muscular, funny, exciting, adventurous, cool, a real man’s man-the kind of man other men want to be, and women want to be with! But most of all, out of everything else, my best trait is…I’m modest. ; )
So if you’re looking to further your career at McDonalds, or think that Liver Spots are really, really hot, then I’m not the guy for you. But if you want to meet up and have a great time and some great conversation, then we should get together. If you think you can handle it, that is!
Talk soon,
Tony
I'm so glad that you feel you can raise my station in life. Further my career at McDonalds! You are SO GENEROUS to spend an entire paragraph insulting me, and then make such an offer when I am obviously not worthy. Of anything. And of course attractive young men couldn't POSSIBLY be interested in me, because apparently I have a dorky name.