Logic
My sister has the best logic: Guys can go topless in public because they don't have sticky-outy-things "up there". Therefore, girls should be able to go without pants/skirt, because they don't have sticky-outy-things "down there".
I love being able to talk with Becca. I've always loved her dearly, but for ages we just sort of drifted around each other, and when we didn't it was annoying (ok, I was bitchy and got annoyed). She'd say "I hate you" or "You know what? You're ugly" and I'd roll my eyes or say "thank you" because I knew she didn't mean it--she just wanted to get a reaction/punish me for ignoring and avoiding her/something. And then I left school, and stopped being such a bitch, and we started talking and hanging out together again--not a ton, but I guess I wasn't avoiding her (along with all other human contact) anymore. And she'd say she was happy I was out of school because I was being nice again, and she'd say "I love you" or "You know what? You're pretty". And it's almost exactly the same--the contexts, the tone of voice ... everything. Just two words changed.
It probably helps that she's getting older, so there's more I can talk to her about. But it probably helps even more that I'm not such an angry, exhausted, frustrated bitch anymore.
I've always known I was lucky to have her and Mom, but I feel like I'm only just realizing exactly *how* lucky. Because I adore both of them beyond words. And I know I'm lucky to have Dad, too. I just ... still need to figure out why. And that's what hurts--that I know he's amazing, that he loves me, that we have so much in common, and that I'm lucky to have him. But it still doesn't mean anything.
I love being able to talk with Becca. I've always loved her dearly, but for ages we just sort of drifted around each other, and when we didn't it was annoying (ok, I was bitchy and got annoyed). She'd say "I hate you" or "You know what? You're ugly" and I'd roll my eyes or say "thank you" because I knew she didn't mean it--she just wanted to get a reaction/punish me for ignoring and avoiding her/something. And then I left school, and stopped being such a bitch, and we started talking and hanging out together again--not a ton, but I guess I wasn't avoiding her (along with all other human contact) anymore. And she'd say she was happy I was out of school because I was being nice again, and she'd say "I love you" or "You know what? You're pretty". And it's almost exactly the same--the contexts, the tone of voice ... everything. Just two words changed.
It probably helps that she's getting older, so there's more I can talk to her about. But it probably helps even more that I'm not such an angry, exhausted, frustrated bitch anymore.
I've always known I was lucky to have her and Mom, but I feel like I'm only just realizing exactly *how* lucky. Because I adore both of them beyond words. And I know I'm lucky to have Dad, too. I just ... still need to figure out why. And that's what hurts--that I know he's amazing, that he loves me, that we have so much in common, and that I'm lucky to have him. But it still doesn't mean anything.