i cant even think of a title...

[arsenon42]

I get this feeling Im being used. that i was lied to with intent for something that i should have seen. im idiot. or at least i feel like an idiot. i cant stop listening to my wuss rock. im depresed for lack of better words. im jelouse over a person that i should not even like just as much be jelouse that he would rather hang out with his friends. i tried to end it and failed. i think i see that coming on again. repetative. im pathetic. self destruction? wouldnt be suprised. im tired all the time now. iv been taking naps. i dont take naps. how do i find my happy again. i try to look for my happy place but im still having problems of thinking about me being happy, i know i have been i just cant remember that feeling now. it been awhile. even when im "happy" i dont feel happy. iv lost faith in some people. some recently, some over a period of a time, took me to get slapped in the face to realize that. and thats why i feel like an idiot. too bad there is no big whole to crawl into and hide in for awhile. iv been ignoring my friends lately...

im a bad person...