what did i do wrong?

[aromeoh]

i am so unbelievably tired of people not caring. especially the ones that are supposed to care the most. i dont know what to say. my best friend doesnt even seem to care anymore. im beginning to think hes not really even my friend anymore. and ive never been anything but a friend to him and he just acts like theres something wrong with me. just goes to show i guess..you never really know. seems like a lot of things are happening that way these days. i think ive finally, honestly, and truly reached the end of my tether..i feel like a compressed air tank thats been heated to 500 degrees and im about to bust. i HATE it..and im doing my best to just deal and be as strong as possible but come on..THINGS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS. for the first time since before anna and i started seeing each other, i feel truly afraid. afraid that things arent going to work out after all and im going to end up completely and totally alone. that things wont be ok.. i feel like i have noone, and it kinda hurts..

i guess i just wish i knew what to do..

sigh..forget it..im gonna jump in the shower.