(no subject)
The blood was indefinable. How can one put to words this feeling of absolute completion? Yet, there is that inevitable loneliness that accompanies such a feast. And as the body of this woman grew cold to my touch, her warmth was what infused every fiber of this immortal body. I laid there, unable to move, still swimming in the ecstasy of her blood. For a moment just soaking in the quietness of my agony of only a few hours ago. As always the reality comes back too soon, and I found myself being pulled by some powerful force back to the bitter surface. That space where dreams and wakefulness intertwine and you’re not sure which is real or imagined.
A voice. A touch. A familiar pain, and a very familiar pleasure and longing assailed my already electrified senses. I listened; strangely I felt comfort in it. It curled around my ear, and pierced my brain. Something then caressed my face; it was wet and warm. I didn’t want to leave this place just yet, if it meant that this voice would disappear as well. It was from something so many years ago. Something I had almost forgotten. I wanted to speak out loud but was too afraid. I didn’t want to break the spell.
When I finally dared to move, lolling my head to the side, my eyes slowly opened. To my disappointment the room was empty. I couldn’t stop the hushed words before they passed over my lips. “Don’t leave me just yet.” Ah, but it was just another dream. A fools desire for something I once had.
The room was dark as before, and a deep growing chill clawed its way up from deep within me. The swoon was wearing off, and with it my coherent mind returned. My body was still full with the blood of my victim, yet the euphoric delirium lost its punch. However, for those precious few moments I felt whole. Desperately trying to hold onto that feeling of bliss, my insecurities however had other designs.
The mattress creaked under my weight as I slowly sat up right. I looked back over my shoulder to the woman who gave her life with such heated passion; the scent of her sweat still permeated my nostrils and flesh. Her only crime was that she took payment for nights of lust shared with men who could afford it. Her heart was not truly evil. Not in the sense that I’ve tasted evil in the hearts of murderous mortals. This was wrong. I shouldn’t have killed her. But, there was no turning back from what I’ve done. And why should I?
It was time to depart this silent scene of death. But there was one more order of the business of killing that had to be performed before I could leave, and that was to get rid of the body. I moved into the bathroom to look for something to cover her, to conceal my dastardly crime while I moved through the streets. I caught something from the corner of my eye, and turned to look at my reflection in the mirror. I had no time for this, yet there was something that held me there. The reflection was somewhat different; I almost didn’t know the person I was looking at. I laughed. This was ridiculous.
Yet, something was changing in the reflection, as I stood transfixed upon my own face. The eyes were black, not the violet that I was used to seeing. The face was taking on a more sinister appearance, and a slow smile gleamed upon his lips. I had to take a step back, almost stumbling over something on the floor, falling to my back against the wall. I was curious and terrified at the same time. What is this? Who is this? Then it spoke. “You have done well tonight, Daniel.”
I must have been hearing things. This is it, what I feared would happen, has happened at last. I was loosing my mind. This couldn’t be real. “Who are you?” I couldn’t get away, I felt like I was being pinned to the wall.
“Why, I’m you, Daniel” His face then took on an even more gruesome appearance. His mouth turned up into a broad smile, his fangs fully visible to me. I thought I was going to get sick. “No. . . Leave me alone.” I clutched my head tightly between both hands to cover my ears. I didn’t want to hear anymore of this. I was going mad.
“I can’t leave you alone. I am the very core of you. If I left, you would die. That would not profit either of us, now would it?”
“You’re not real. . .”
“Oh, I am real. Who wakes you as the sun sets below the horizon? Who is that which makes you hunger for human blood? Who is with you when you are feeling alone and dejected, pressing you to go on? It is I. I am the one who is your only companion. Not even your maker can fully understand this.”
I stood back up, not realizing I had fallen to the floor. My reflection patiently waited until I regained my composure somewhat. “Why now? Why do you choose to speak to me now, after all these years?”
“I have always spoken to you, Daniel. You have chosen not to listen, until now.”
It was then I crashed through the window to get away from this thing that spoke my name, and ran as fast as I could to return home. The coming dawn was faster, and the weakness came on too quickly. I knew I wasn’t going to make it back in time to find my rest in safety. I had no other choice but to find safety on my own from the sun.
There was an abandoned building that was cordoned off, and had signs of its impending demolition. I only hoped for my sake that this would not happen soon. Finding a hiding place deep in the bowels of this decrepit and crumbling structure I would be safe to sleep and return home and hope that Santino would not be too angry with me. I’m sure he would understand once I told him what happened. Then a thought occurred to me. If I tell him of what happened or what I thought had happened he would deem me insane, and that’s something I’m not ready to face at the moment. No. I will keep this little delusion a secret and think of something else.
A voice. A touch. A familiar pain, and a very familiar pleasure and longing assailed my already electrified senses. I listened; strangely I felt comfort in it. It curled around my ear, and pierced my brain. Something then caressed my face; it was wet and warm. I didn’t want to leave this place just yet, if it meant that this voice would disappear as well. It was from something so many years ago. Something I had almost forgotten. I wanted to speak out loud but was too afraid. I didn’t want to break the spell.
When I finally dared to move, lolling my head to the side, my eyes slowly opened. To my disappointment the room was empty. I couldn’t stop the hushed words before they passed over my lips. “Don’t leave me just yet.” Ah, but it was just another dream. A fools desire for something I once had.
The room was dark as before, and a deep growing chill clawed its way up from deep within me. The swoon was wearing off, and with it my coherent mind returned. My body was still full with the blood of my victim, yet the euphoric delirium lost its punch. However, for those precious few moments I felt whole. Desperately trying to hold onto that feeling of bliss, my insecurities however had other designs.
The mattress creaked under my weight as I slowly sat up right. I looked back over my shoulder to the woman who gave her life with such heated passion; the scent of her sweat still permeated my nostrils and flesh. Her only crime was that she took payment for nights of lust shared with men who could afford it. Her heart was not truly evil. Not in the sense that I’ve tasted evil in the hearts of murderous mortals. This was wrong. I shouldn’t have killed her. But, there was no turning back from what I’ve done. And why should I?
It was time to depart this silent scene of death. But there was one more order of the business of killing that had to be performed before I could leave, and that was to get rid of the body. I moved into the bathroom to look for something to cover her, to conceal my dastardly crime while I moved through the streets. I caught something from the corner of my eye, and turned to look at my reflection in the mirror. I had no time for this, yet there was something that held me there. The reflection was somewhat different; I almost didn’t know the person I was looking at. I laughed. This was ridiculous.
Yet, something was changing in the reflection, as I stood transfixed upon my own face. The eyes were black, not the violet that I was used to seeing. The face was taking on a more sinister appearance, and a slow smile gleamed upon his lips. I had to take a step back, almost stumbling over something on the floor, falling to my back against the wall. I was curious and terrified at the same time. What is this? Who is this? Then it spoke. “You have done well tonight, Daniel.”
I must have been hearing things. This is it, what I feared would happen, has happened at last. I was loosing my mind. This couldn’t be real. “Who are you?” I couldn’t get away, I felt like I was being pinned to the wall.
“Why, I’m you, Daniel” His face then took on an even more gruesome appearance. His mouth turned up into a broad smile, his fangs fully visible to me. I thought I was going to get sick. “No. . . Leave me alone.” I clutched my head tightly between both hands to cover my ears. I didn’t want to hear anymore of this. I was going mad.
“I can’t leave you alone. I am the very core of you. If I left, you would die. That would not profit either of us, now would it?”
“You’re not real. . .”
“Oh, I am real. Who wakes you as the sun sets below the horizon? Who is that which makes you hunger for human blood? Who is with you when you are feeling alone and dejected, pressing you to go on? It is I. I am the one who is your only companion. Not even your maker can fully understand this.”
I stood back up, not realizing I had fallen to the floor. My reflection patiently waited until I regained my composure somewhat. “Why now? Why do you choose to speak to me now, after all these years?”
“I have always spoken to you, Daniel. You have chosen not to listen, until now.”
It was then I crashed through the window to get away from this thing that spoke my name, and ran as fast as I could to return home. The coming dawn was faster, and the weakness came on too quickly. I knew I wasn’t going to make it back in time to find my rest in safety. I had no other choice but to find safety on my own from the sun.
There was an abandoned building that was cordoned off, and had signs of its impending demolition. I only hoped for my sake that this would not happen soon. Finding a hiding place deep in the bowels of this decrepit and crumbling structure I would be safe to sleep and return home and hope that Santino would not be too angry with me. I’m sure he would understand once I told him what happened. Then a thought occurred to me. If I tell him of what happened or what I thought had happened he would deem me insane, and that’s something I’m not ready to face at the moment. No. I will keep this little delusion a secret and think of something else.