(no subject)
In the past 24 hours I have had four fellas ask me out. Seriously, what the fuck? Am I like...secretly awesome? Don't get me wrong, I'm very flattered and this a great boost to my confidence, but I'm nothing special.
I've finally snagged a friend who is into jogging with me every day. I was in so much better shape last year. Kandace and I are going to be jogging at the park every week day for an hour. I'm so pumped. That just gives me more motivation to eat healthier. She's going to help me keep fast food at bay. Taco Bell and I have gotten far too close over the past few years.
Sometimes it's weird to be around her. Sometimes I think about when we were fifteen and "in love" and listened to Taking Back Sunday and cuddled. Sometimes I miss it, and sometimes it just seems so foreign and bizarre.
Then I just start thinking about high school. Which of course makes me think about Dan. I wish we could have stayed friends. I wish it wasn't so damn awkward for us to be around each other any more. the last time we spoke, he said "I can't even playfully touch you because I feel like I'm crossing some line. I have a girlfriend. Who have been with four almost five years. I shouldn't feel the way I do about you. But I can't help it." Dan is the most intelligent person I've ever known. I used to be jealous of his girlfriend because he was the first guy to seem as though he genuinely cared about me. I kind of miss him. But only because I still have a sleeping problem and he used to stay up with me and talk. I'd really like to be his friend. But it just doesn't work.
I think I'm going to withdraw from my Math class and take it over summer with a different instructor. I just...feel weird in there. And my grade is awful.
I've finally snagged a friend who is into jogging with me every day. I was in so much better shape last year. Kandace and I are going to be jogging at the park every week day for an hour. I'm so pumped. That just gives me more motivation to eat healthier. She's going to help me keep fast food at bay. Taco Bell and I have gotten far too close over the past few years.
Sometimes it's weird to be around her. Sometimes I think about when we were fifteen and "in love" and listened to Taking Back Sunday and cuddled. Sometimes I miss it, and sometimes it just seems so foreign and bizarre.
Then I just start thinking about high school. Which of course makes me think about Dan. I wish we could have stayed friends. I wish it wasn't so damn awkward for us to be around each other any more. the last time we spoke, he said "I can't even playfully touch you because I feel like I'm crossing some line. I have a girlfriend. Who have been with four almost five years. I shouldn't feel the way I do about you. But I can't help it." Dan is the most intelligent person I've ever known. I used to be jealous of his girlfriend because he was the first guy to seem as though he genuinely cared about me. I kind of miss him. But only because I still have a sleeping problem and he used to stay up with me and talk. I'd really like to be his friend. But it just doesn't work.
I think I'm going to withdraw from my Math class and take it over summer with a different instructor. I just...feel weird in there. And my grade is awful.