DIVISION FIC :: "Ghost Stories :: Track 8" [CD/Jinny, PG13-NC17]
INDEX & DISCLAIMER INFO { DW || LJ }
Track Eight: "Empty"
This shallow need to feel wanted
Worshiped and adored and ever be ignored
I give you love but you don't see it
You never understand my world is in your hands
"Hi, my name is Jinny, and I'm an alcoholic."
"Hi, Jinny."
The chorus of greetings grounds me, and I take a deep breath to steady my nerves. These testimonials always freak me out. I hate speaking in public, but this is important.
"Four months ago today, I signed my life over to Camp Recovery to go through rehab. Four months ago today, I started to detox from years of alcohol abuse. Four months ago today, I took my last drink." I pause and close my eyes for just a moment. "There are still days that I struggle with wanting to have a drink, but I resist the temptation every single time. It's not always easy, but I have reasons not to drink now, and it's not just because I don't want to lose my job. Getting sober was the best thing that happened to me. I got another chance at my life, my job, and I found people who really care about me."
+++++
The meeting seemed to go on forever tonight, and I'm not sure why that is. There wasn't anything different about it, other than the fact that I've now been sober for four months straight. But even that's not enough to make me not want to be at a meeting.
Maybe it's the phone call from CD right before I went into my meeting that's causing it. We'd planned on doing dinner and a movie afterward at the apartment, since Casey's got a night shift. Cd's been cooking her surprise meal since we got out of work. I had a couple of errands to run, then my meeting, so couldn't even spend a few minutes with her to wind down after the strange case Magda and I were working today.
CD had called to ask me to bring home something for dessert. Maybe that's it. She called it home. She's been practically living at our apartment ever since I moved in with Casey, and even has her own set of keys to the place. She hasn't spent the night yet, always making sure to get home before she gets too tired, but she's always there with us. She even has stuff programmed in the TiVo that Casey bought!
I wander around the snooty, high class grocery store I found, but I can't decide on anything that sounds good. I don't know what Cd's making, so I can't figure out what will be a good end to the meal. I hate that she's planning this surprise dinner date, and yet I love every second of it. I finally grab a cherry cheesecake, a bag of Double Stuff Oreos, a gallon of milk, and a beautiful white rose that's still tightly wound in the bud stage.
Resisting the urge to speed, I get home as quickly as possible and lug my booty up to the apartment. Standing outside the door, I can smell the garlic bread, and my mouth starts to water. Oh, she's making Italian tonight. Maybe she's trying Mom's spaghetti sauce. Casey did say she was asking about the recipe last week.
"I'm home," I call as I step into the apartment, hiding the rose under my jacket on the coat rack temporarily.
CD steps out of the kitchen with a broad smile and comes to press a quick kiss to my lips. "Welcome home, babe," she says, a twinkle in her eyes. "What'd you get for dessert?"
She follows me into the kitchen and watches avidly as I set the bags down to put the milk away.
"Well, since you wouldn't give me any hints about dinner, I decided to bring home a couple of things," I reply and pull out the Oreos. "The cheap and easy dessert of Oreos and milk is always fun to have, so that had to come home. And then I found this gorgeous cherry cheesecake and decided to get that, too."
"Both will work perfectly," she says as I put the cheesecake into the fridge, too.
When I turn around, she's right there behind me, and I take a step back to lean against the fridge. CD steps further into my personal space, and tilts her head down for another kiss. Definitely not so chaste and quick this time, and any thought I'd had of a shower before dinner are now shot. Her lips feel soft and warm against mine, and I moan into the kiss when she slips her tongue into my mouth. My arms go up around her neck, fingers tangling in the messy blonde hair that she's started growing out. Her hands move to grip my waist, pinning me in place.
The sound of the oven timer going off is the only thing that pulls her away from the kiss. I can't help but pout when she takes a step back, but that pout turns into a smile as she pulls a pan of bubbling lasagna from the oven. So that's why she wanted Mom's recipe.
"Can you grab the salad?" she asks as she starts to dish up the lasagna and garlic bread on two plates. I do as she asks, adding the food to the plates. "Thanks, Jin. Now go get comfy on the couch. I'll bring in the food."
"Yes, ma'am," I say with a snappy salute before heading out of the kitchen. I grab the rose and set it on the end table, out of her line of sight. Just watching her walk in with our food, a broad smile on her face, makes my heart want to burst from happiness. "It smells delicious, CD."
"Don't start yet," she warns as she sets the plates down, then heads back into the kitchen. When she returns, she has two wine glasses and a bottle of Martinelli's sparkling cider. "Now dinner is complete," she says as she sits next to me.
"Not quite," I reply and reach for the white rose. "I saw this and thought of you." Okay, saying the words makes me feel cheesy, but the delight on her face chases that sensation away.
She brings the bud to her face and takes a deep breath, smile widening on her face. She then pulls me close in a tight hug and sprinkles my face with little kisses until I'm in tears from laughter. "It's beautiful, Jinny. Thank you."
Cd's on her feet again to put the flower in water, finally setting it on the coffee table between our plates. We turn on some random episode of that stupid doctor show she's addicted to while we eat our dinner. I have no idea why CD is so into ER, but I'll put up with it for her. Maybe it's that lesbian character that she swears looks like Magda. I don't see it.
++CD++
Dinner turned out perfectly. I am so relieved that I didn't mess up the recipe for the sauce. I'm not sure who would have killed me more for it, Casey or Jinny. But Jinny said it was just like her mom's sauce, so I'll take the success.
Once we finish eating, I send Jinny off for her shower while I clean up the kitchen. All three of us are going to be eating well for the next several days on the leftover lasagna. Cheesecake doesn't sound good right now, so I grab the Oreos and two big glasses of milk to nibble on during our movie.
Sitting on the couch, I stroke the velvety petals on the rose that Jinny gave me. It's so beautiful, and I can feel tears stinging my eyes. I'm not sure what the hell I did to deserve this, but I'm going to do everything I can not to mess it up. Paul has no clue, and I don't want him to. I know exactly what he'd think about this relationship, and I'll be damned if I let him turn it into some tawdry fantasy material.
"Penny for them?" Jinny's soft question pulls me out of my darkly swirling thoughts.
"Just thinking," I reply with a smile as she settles on the couch next to me.
"About what?"
"You. Us. Wondering what I did to deserve this?"
Jinny laughs and snuggles into my side. "I ask myself that every single day, CD. And every time I get the same answer: because I deserve something good in my life."
"I can't argue with that."
The kiss is tender, reassuring. I can taste peppermint on Jinny's tongue from the toothpaste she and Casey like so much. She nips at my lower lip, and I gasp at the sensation. Her chuckle vibrates against my lips and I pull her closer. She feels warm from her shower, and my fingers comb through her damp hair, fisting it briefly just to hear her moan, feel her shiver in my arms. Grinning into the kiss, I tighten my grip on her hair again and begin to trail kisses down the column of her exposed throat. Mint and vanilla, my new favorite scent combination.
"CD," she whimpers, breath catching in her throat when I lightly nip at her neck.
"Hmm?"
"Movie," she finally mutters. I lean back to stare at her for a moment, then start laughing. "What the hell's so funny?"
"Do you even know what movie I chose for tonight, babe?"
When she shakes her head, I just grab the remote and start the DVD. Jinny's delighted, embarrassed laughter echoes in the room as Desert Hearts begins to play.
"Why?" she finally asks, motioning toward the TV.
"I've never seen it before?"
"Really?" I nod, feeling weirdly self-conscious all of a sudden. I hate feeling like that. Jinny's grin grows broader and she shifts to curl into my side again. "Then let's watch the movie. I think you might like it."
+++++
"Oh my," I murmur, completely caught up in the movie.
Don't get me wrong. The story itself is compelling enough, but this love scene? Wow! And how can I not make comparisons between these two characters and Jin and myself? The coloring alone…
Jinny leans up to press a nuzzling kiss below my left ear, and I shudder in response. She chuckles softly and does it again. I can feel my nipples stiffen at the sensation and fight the urge to squirm. Her lips work their way up to my earlobe, tongue tracing around the diamond stud, and suddenly the movie doesn't matter anymore.
She nips her way across my jaw to take possession of my lips, and I shift back to lean against the arm of the couch. Jinny sinuously stretches out along my body, never letting up on the searing kiss. My hands grip her hips, holding her close, as our tongues duel for domination. Her breasts are pressed against mine, and I can feel her nipples through the sweatshirt she's wearing. My right hand slides up her back, under the sweatshirt, stroking her skin just to feel it jump beneath my fingertips.
Jinny pulls back to sit up, straddling my hips, and looks down at me through half-closed eyes. My hand slips around to tease her side and stomach, making her muscles quiver. She worries her lower lip between her teeth, head thrown back, as I shift up to cup her breast. The warm weight feels so right in my palm. Her soft moan as I brush my thumb across her nipple sends a jolt of desire down my spine to pool in the pit of my stomach.
"God, Jin," I mutter hoarsely and lean up to kiss her again. I think I could live on her kisses.
She moans into the kiss and traps my hand against her breast, rocking against my hips. I pull back to watch her again as I lightly squeeze her nipple between finger and thumb. The way she moves above me, head thrown back, is so damned sexy! With a devious grin, I pull her sweatshirt up and capture her free nipple between my lips, eliciting a delighted squeal from Jinny. Wanting to hear that sound again, I lightly scrape my teeth along her nipple.
Jinny arches her back, chest pressing closer to my face, and she grips my hair in her hand to hold my head in place. The taut pull on my hair sends another jolt of desire down my spine, and I growl softly around her nipple, one hand sliding down to rest between her legs. God, she's so hot! She shivers and moans softly in response, then tightens her grip on my hair until I lean back to meet her heated gaze.
"Bedroom," she murmurs huskily, but doesn't move immediately.
Taking a deep breath to steady myself, I nod and tug her sweatshirt down, then lean up to press a gentle kiss to her lips. She nods and rests her forehead against mine for just a moment before she shakily gets to her feet. The now-forgotten movie is turned off, then she grabs my hand and leads me into her bedroom.
++Jinny++
CD closes the door and we're standing here, facing each other in my bedroom. I can see how aroused she is, and I know how damned crazy I feel right now. It's time, damn it! We've been good, going slowly with this relationship, but I need this. I need her. Stepping closer, I reach up to pull her head down into a long, slow kiss. I don't want to rush through this first time, I want to savor every damned second of it.
Taking a step back, I maintain eye contact with CD and pull my sweatshirt off. The room is warm, but my skin pebbles in goose bumps anyway. I am snared by Cd's eyes darkening with desire as she watches me strip naked before her, and I can't help but shiver under that intense scrutiny. Her eyes possessively travel the length of my body, down and back up, and it feels like her hands are all over me.
She accepts the hand I hold out toward her and walks me backward until I fall onto the bed. Looming over me, CD is motionless for what feels like an eternity before she leans over to take my left nipple into her mouth again. My back arches, and I whimper when her teeth clamp down lightly on the sensitive flesh. My hands go to her hair again, fingers carding through the shaggy locks repeatedly.
CD switches to my other nipple, right hand moving possessively down my side to lightly trace its way back up my inner thigh. Part of me is embarrassed by how wet I am right now, but I don't want her to stop either. She growls softly around my nipple as her fingers explore my lips, always coming close to my clit, but never quite touching it. And then she finally glides a single fingertip across my clit, and my entire body spasms at the touch. God, I think I'm gonna die when she finally lets me come!
She eases two fingers into me, thumb rubbing small circles around my clit, but not quite touching it again. There's a guttural sound coming from her throat when I clench my muscles around her fingers, and I can feel myself getting even wetter.
"Damn, Jin," she murmurs against my skin. "I want you."
"Please?" Do I really sound that needy?
Her fingers pump in and out a couple more times before she removes them. Leaning up on her elbow, she stares hungrily at me and swirls her fingers around my nipple before sucking it clean. She practically purrs as she then licks her fingers clean. Shifting, she kisses her way down my body, fingers again filling me. On her knees at the edge of the bed, she spreads my lips open with her other hand and blows lightly across my clit. My hips shoot up at the sensation, and her forearm rests heavily across my lower belly to keep me in place.
"Oh god," I whimper as her tongue delicately traces around my clit. "Please, CD…"
"Please what?" she asks, the breath from each word caressing my aching, needy flesh. But she takes pity on me and doesn't wait for me to formulate the words I need. Leaning in closer again, she wraps her lips around my clit, tongue flicking back and forth across it. Her fingers pick up their rhythm, a third sliding in to join its mates deep in my pussy.
It doesn't take long for my need to overwhelm me, and I succumb to my orgasm with a loud cry. Body spasming, I can feel my muscles clenching tightly around her fingers, trying to suck her into my body. Cd's tongue and fingers continue moving, coaxing my orgasm to extend out into a second one, almost as powerful as the first.
Just when I swear I'll black out from it all, I feel her fingers ease out of my body, and she places gentle kisses on my feverish skin before gently lapping up my arousal. More gentle kisses trail up my body until she's stretched out next to me and gazing down at me with a smile. She reaches down to wipe away the tears on my cheeks, then gently kisses my lips. I can taste myself on her lips and tongue, and my muscles quiver in reaction.
"Shh," she whispers, kissing away more tears. "I'm right here, babe. I've got you. You're okay."
"I love you, CD," I finally whisper when I can get my mouth and brain to work in tandem.
CD blinks in surprise and studies my face for a long moment. There's something unreadable in her eyes, and I suddenly fear that I've said too much. I'm just about to say something, tell her I don't really mean it, when a single tear slips down her cheek.
"I love you, too, Jinny," she replies in just as soft a tone as I did, then kisses me again.
Hearing her say those words eases the fear clenching at my heart, and I roll over to straddle her waist again. More kisses follow as I unbutton the blue shirt that I love on her. In next to no time, she's naked from the waist up and I shift down to feast on her delicate peach nipples. Her soft moans and encouragement spur me on to undo the fly of her jeans and slip my hand into the wet heat between her legs.
But it's not enough, and I scoot back to stand at the foot of the bed, tugging the denim and cotton underwear down her sinfully long legs. I take a few seconds to drink in the sight of my CD naked and flushed with arousal in my bed, and then I'm on my knees, face buried between her legs. Cd's just as wet as I am, and tastes of warm cinnamon and lemony honey. Oh, I could easily become addicted to that taste, if she'll let me.
Two fingers slide deep into her clutching pussy as I lash the tip of my tongue back and forth across her clit. She shifts, spreading her legs farther apart, and I add a third, and then a fourth finger. Her entire body is twitching in time with my thrusting fingers and flicking tongue. I can tell she's close; her breathing is coming in short gasps, her hips rising to meet each thrust of my fingers. I bite down lightly on her clit, trapping it between my teeth, and redouble my tongue's movements against it until her entire body stiffens. She grunts softly with each bodily spasm, and I wonder what it will take to make her cry out.
"Babe, wait," she murmurs roughly, hands pressing against the top of my head slightly. "Too much."
Dropping a soft kiss to her inner thigh as I slide my fingers out, I let CD pull me up to lay next to her, head resting on her chest. The steady thrumming of her heart matches my own, and I smile contentedly. With a soft sigh, she tugs at my chin until I meet her gaze again. The naked emotions in her eyes are so intense, so overwhelming, I nearly come again.
"This is why I needed to get sober," I say softly, feeling my own emotions practically choke me.
"Mind-blowing sex?" she asks in a teasing tone, but her eyes are more serious. "Not that I'm complaining, of course."
"I've had a lot of practice and a lot of years to fantasize about it," I admit slowly. When CD yawns and shifts against me, I tighten my grip around her waist. "Don't go back to your apartment tonight, CD. Stay here with me?" She looks like she's going to say something, but I don't let her. "I don't want to wake up alone in the morning and think this was all just a damned dream, or me trying to find solace in some other nameless blonde bimbo that isn't you."
Cd's arms pull me closer, almost painfully so, and she leans in to bestow a soul-searing kiss on me. "I'm not going anywhere, Jinny, I promise. We're in this together, right?"
I nod, unable to get any words past the lump in my throat as I remember her saying those exact words in so many dreams. She smiles and shifts our bodies up toward the pillows, and we awkwardly maneuver the covers over ourselves. Another gentle kiss before exhaustion claims me, and I snuggle into her body again, content at last.
+++++
A knock at the door startles me awake, and I don't know where I am for a long moment. And then I recognize Cd's lanky body beneath mine and smile. The knock sounds again.
"Jin? Did something happen to Cd's Durango?" Casey's voice floats in through the closed door, waking CD, too. "Or did you two finally stop dancing around each other and get your groove on?"
CD gasps in embarrassment and tries to dive under the covers when the doorknob rattles.
"Fuck off, Casey!" I call out to him, and grin at CD.
"Just make sure you're both dressed when you come out for breakfast, okay? There are just some things that a baby brother is not meant to see."
Original post @ Dreamwidth with
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Track Eight: "Empty"
This shallow need to feel wanted
Worshiped and adored and ever be ignored
I give you love but you don't see it
You never understand my world is in your hands
"Hi, my name is Jinny, and I'm an alcoholic."
"Hi, Jinny."
The chorus of greetings grounds me, and I take a deep breath to steady my nerves. These testimonials always freak me out. I hate speaking in public, but this is important.
"Four months ago today, I signed my life over to Camp Recovery to go through rehab. Four months ago today, I started to detox from years of alcohol abuse. Four months ago today, I took my last drink." I pause and close my eyes for just a moment. "There are still days that I struggle with wanting to have a drink, but I resist the temptation every single time. It's not always easy, but I have reasons not to drink now, and it's not just because I don't want to lose my job. Getting sober was the best thing that happened to me. I got another chance at my life, my job, and I found people who really care about me."
+++++
The meeting seemed to go on forever tonight, and I'm not sure why that is. There wasn't anything different about it, other than the fact that I've now been sober for four months straight. But even that's not enough to make me not want to be at a meeting.
Maybe it's the phone call from CD right before I went into my meeting that's causing it. We'd planned on doing dinner and a movie afterward at the apartment, since Casey's got a night shift. Cd's been cooking her surprise meal since we got out of work. I had a couple of errands to run, then my meeting, so couldn't even spend a few minutes with her to wind down after the strange case Magda and I were working today.
CD had called to ask me to bring home something for dessert. Maybe that's it. She called it home. She's been practically living at our apartment ever since I moved in with Casey, and even has her own set of keys to the place. She hasn't spent the night yet, always making sure to get home before she gets too tired, but she's always there with us. She even has stuff programmed in the TiVo that Casey bought!
I wander around the snooty, high class grocery store I found, but I can't decide on anything that sounds good. I don't know what Cd's making, so I can't figure out what will be a good end to the meal. I hate that she's planning this surprise dinner date, and yet I love every second of it. I finally grab a cherry cheesecake, a bag of Double Stuff Oreos, a gallon of milk, and a beautiful white rose that's still tightly wound in the bud stage.
Resisting the urge to speed, I get home as quickly as possible and lug my booty up to the apartment. Standing outside the door, I can smell the garlic bread, and my mouth starts to water. Oh, she's making Italian tonight. Maybe she's trying Mom's spaghetti sauce. Casey did say she was asking about the recipe last week.
"I'm home," I call as I step into the apartment, hiding the rose under my jacket on the coat rack temporarily.
CD steps out of the kitchen with a broad smile and comes to press a quick kiss to my lips. "Welcome home, babe," she says, a twinkle in her eyes. "What'd you get for dessert?"
She follows me into the kitchen and watches avidly as I set the bags down to put the milk away.
"Well, since you wouldn't give me any hints about dinner, I decided to bring home a couple of things," I reply and pull out the Oreos. "The cheap and easy dessert of Oreos and milk is always fun to have, so that had to come home. And then I found this gorgeous cherry cheesecake and decided to get that, too."
"Both will work perfectly," she says as I put the cheesecake into the fridge, too.
When I turn around, she's right there behind me, and I take a step back to lean against the fridge. CD steps further into my personal space, and tilts her head down for another kiss. Definitely not so chaste and quick this time, and any thought I'd had of a shower before dinner are now shot. Her lips feel soft and warm against mine, and I moan into the kiss when she slips her tongue into my mouth. My arms go up around her neck, fingers tangling in the messy blonde hair that she's started growing out. Her hands move to grip my waist, pinning me in place.
The sound of the oven timer going off is the only thing that pulls her away from the kiss. I can't help but pout when she takes a step back, but that pout turns into a smile as she pulls a pan of bubbling lasagna from the oven. So that's why she wanted Mom's recipe.
"Can you grab the salad?" she asks as she starts to dish up the lasagna and garlic bread on two plates. I do as she asks, adding the food to the plates. "Thanks, Jin. Now go get comfy on the couch. I'll bring in the food."
"Yes, ma'am," I say with a snappy salute before heading out of the kitchen. I grab the rose and set it on the end table, out of her line of sight. Just watching her walk in with our food, a broad smile on her face, makes my heart want to burst from happiness. "It smells delicious, CD."
"Don't start yet," she warns as she sets the plates down, then heads back into the kitchen. When she returns, she has two wine glasses and a bottle of Martinelli's sparkling cider. "Now dinner is complete," she says as she sits next to me.
"Not quite," I reply and reach for the white rose. "I saw this and thought of you." Okay, saying the words makes me feel cheesy, but the delight on her face chases that sensation away.
She brings the bud to her face and takes a deep breath, smile widening on her face. She then pulls me close in a tight hug and sprinkles my face with little kisses until I'm in tears from laughter. "It's beautiful, Jinny. Thank you."
Cd's on her feet again to put the flower in water, finally setting it on the coffee table between our plates. We turn on some random episode of that stupid doctor show she's addicted to while we eat our dinner. I have no idea why CD is so into ER, but I'll put up with it for her. Maybe it's that lesbian character that she swears looks like Magda. I don't see it.
++CD++
Dinner turned out perfectly. I am so relieved that I didn't mess up the recipe for the sauce. I'm not sure who would have killed me more for it, Casey or Jinny. But Jinny said it was just like her mom's sauce, so I'll take the success.
Once we finish eating, I send Jinny off for her shower while I clean up the kitchen. All three of us are going to be eating well for the next several days on the leftover lasagna. Cheesecake doesn't sound good right now, so I grab the Oreos and two big glasses of milk to nibble on during our movie.
Sitting on the couch, I stroke the velvety petals on the rose that Jinny gave me. It's so beautiful, and I can feel tears stinging my eyes. I'm not sure what the hell I did to deserve this, but I'm going to do everything I can not to mess it up. Paul has no clue, and I don't want him to. I know exactly what he'd think about this relationship, and I'll be damned if I let him turn it into some tawdry fantasy material.
"Penny for them?" Jinny's soft question pulls me out of my darkly swirling thoughts.
"Just thinking," I reply with a smile as she settles on the couch next to me.
"About what?"
"You. Us. Wondering what I did to deserve this?"
Jinny laughs and snuggles into my side. "I ask myself that every single day, CD. And every time I get the same answer: because I deserve something good in my life."
"I can't argue with that."
The kiss is tender, reassuring. I can taste peppermint on Jinny's tongue from the toothpaste she and Casey like so much. She nips at my lower lip, and I gasp at the sensation. Her chuckle vibrates against my lips and I pull her closer. She feels warm from her shower, and my fingers comb through her damp hair, fisting it briefly just to hear her moan, feel her shiver in my arms. Grinning into the kiss, I tighten my grip on her hair again and begin to trail kisses down the column of her exposed throat. Mint and vanilla, my new favorite scent combination.
"CD," she whimpers, breath catching in her throat when I lightly nip at her neck.
"Hmm?"
"Movie," she finally mutters. I lean back to stare at her for a moment, then start laughing. "What the hell's so funny?"
"Do you even know what movie I chose for tonight, babe?"
When she shakes her head, I just grab the remote and start the DVD. Jinny's delighted, embarrassed laughter echoes in the room as Desert Hearts begins to play.
"Why?" she finally asks, motioning toward the TV.
"I've never seen it before?"
"Really?" I nod, feeling weirdly self-conscious all of a sudden. I hate feeling like that. Jinny's grin grows broader and she shifts to curl into my side again. "Then let's watch the movie. I think you might like it."
+++++
"Oh my," I murmur, completely caught up in the movie.
Don't get me wrong. The story itself is compelling enough, but this love scene? Wow! And how can I not make comparisons between these two characters and Jin and myself? The coloring alone…
Jinny leans up to press a nuzzling kiss below my left ear, and I shudder in response. She chuckles softly and does it again. I can feel my nipples stiffen at the sensation and fight the urge to squirm. Her lips work their way up to my earlobe, tongue tracing around the diamond stud, and suddenly the movie doesn't matter anymore.
She nips her way across my jaw to take possession of my lips, and I shift back to lean against the arm of the couch. Jinny sinuously stretches out along my body, never letting up on the searing kiss. My hands grip her hips, holding her close, as our tongues duel for domination. Her breasts are pressed against mine, and I can feel her nipples through the sweatshirt she's wearing. My right hand slides up her back, under the sweatshirt, stroking her skin just to feel it jump beneath my fingertips.
Jinny pulls back to sit up, straddling my hips, and looks down at me through half-closed eyes. My hand slips around to tease her side and stomach, making her muscles quiver. She worries her lower lip between her teeth, head thrown back, as I shift up to cup her breast. The warm weight feels so right in my palm. Her soft moan as I brush my thumb across her nipple sends a jolt of desire down my spine to pool in the pit of my stomach.
"God, Jin," I mutter hoarsely and lean up to kiss her again. I think I could live on her kisses.
She moans into the kiss and traps my hand against her breast, rocking against my hips. I pull back to watch her again as I lightly squeeze her nipple between finger and thumb. The way she moves above me, head thrown back, is so damned sexy! With a devious grin, I pull her sweatshirt up and capture her free nipple between my lips, eliciting a delighted squeal from Jinny. Wanting to hear that sound again, I lightly scrape my teeth along her nipple.
Jinny arches her back, chest pressing closer to my face, and she grips my hair in her hand to hold my head in place. The taut pull on my hair sends another jolt of desire down my spine, and I growl softly around her nipple, one hand sliding down to rest between her legs. God, she's so hot! She shivers and moans softly in response, then tightens her grip on my hair until I lean back to meet her heated gaze.
"Bedroom," she murmurs huskily, but doesn't move immediately.
Taking a deep breath to steady myself, I nod and tug her sweatshirt down, then lean up to press a gentle kiss to her lips. She nods and rests her forehead against mine for just a moment before she shakily gets to her feet. The now-forgotten movie is turned off, then she grabs my hand and leads me into her bedroom.
++Jinny++
CD closes the door and we're standing here, facing each other in my bedroom. I can see how aroused she is, and I know how damned crazy I feel right now. It's time, damn it! We've been good, going slowly with this relationship, but I need this. I need her. Stepping closer, I reach up to pull her head down into a long, slow kiss. I don't want to rush through this first time, I want to savor every damned second of it.
Taking a step back, I maintain eye contact with CD and pull my sweatshirt off. The room is warm, but my skin pebbles in goose bumps anyway. I am snared by Cd's eyes darkening with desire as she watches me strip naked before her, and I can't help but shiver under that intense scrutiny. Her eyes possessively travel the length of my body, down and back up, and it feels like her hands are all over me.
She accepts the hand I hold out toward her and walks me backward until I fall onto the bed. Looming over me, CD is motionless for what feels like an eternity before she leans over to take my left nipple into her mouth again. My back arches, and I whimper when her teeth clamp down lightly on the sensitive flesh. My hands go to her hair again, fingers carding through the shaggy locks repeatedly.
CD switches to my other nipple, right hand moving possessively down my side to lightly trace its way back up my inner thigh. Part of me is embarrassed by how wet I am right now, but I don't want her to stop either. She growls softly around my nipple as her fingers explore my lips, always coming close to my clit, but never quite touching it. And then she finally glides a single fingertip across my clit, and my entire body spasms at the touch. God, I think I'm gonna die when she finally lets me come!
She eases two fingers into me, thumb rubbing small circles around my clit, but not quite touching it again. There's a guttural sound coming from her throat when I clench my muscles around her fingers, and I can feel myself getting even wetter.
"Damn, Jin," she murmurs against my skin. "I want you."
"Please?" Do I really sound that needy?
Her fingers pump in and out a couple more times before she removes them. Leaning up on her elbow, she stares hungrily at me and swirls her fingers around my nipple before sucking it clean. She practically purrs as she then licks her fingers clean. Shifting, she kisses her way down my body, fingers again filling me. On her knees at the edge of the bed, she spreads my lips open with her other hand and blows lightly across my clit. My hips shoot up at the sensation, and her forearm rests heavily across my lower belly to keep me in place.
"Oh god," I whimper as her tongue delicately traces around my clit. "Please, CD…"
"Please what?" she asks, the breath from each word caressing my aching, needy flesh. But she takes pity on me and doesn't wait for me to formulate the words I need. Leaning in closer again, she wraps her lips around my clit, tongue flicking back and forth across it. Her fingers pick up their rhythm, a third sliding in to join its mates deep in my pussy.
It doesn't take long for my need to overwhelm me, and I succumb to my orgasm with a loud cry. Body spasming, I can feel my muscles clenching tightly around her fingers, trying to suck her into my body. Cd's tongue and fingers continue moving, coaxing my orgasm to extend out into a second one, almost as powerful as the first.
Just when I swear I'll black out from it all, I feel her fingers ease out of my body, and she places gentle kisses on my feverish skin before gently lapping up my arousal. More gentle kisses trail up my body until she's stretched out next to me and gazing down at me with a smile. She reaches down to wipe away the tears on my cheeks, then gently kisses my lips. I can taste myself on her lips and tongue, and my muscles quiver in reaction.
"Shh," she whispers, kissing away more tears. "I'm right here, babe. I've got you. You're okay."
"I love you, CD," I finally whisper when I can get my mouth and brain to work in tandem.
CD blinks in surprise and studies my face for a long moment. There's something unreadable in her eyes, and I suddenly fear that I've said too much. I'm just about to say something, tell her I don't really mean it, when a single tear slips down her cheek.
"I love you, too, Jinny," she replies in just as soft a tone as I did, then kisses me again.
Hearing her say those words eases the fear clenching at my heart, and I roll over to straddle her waist again. More kisses follow as I unbutton the blue shirt that I love on her. In next to no time, she's naked from the waist up and I shift down to feast on her delicate peach nipples. Her soft moans and encouragement spur me on to undo the fly of her jeans and slip my hand into the wet heat between her legs.
But it's not enough, and I scoot back to stand at the foot of the bed, tugging the denim and cotton underwear down her sinfully long legs. I take a few seconds to drink in the sight of my CD naked and flushed with arousal in my bed, and then I'm on my knees, face buried between her legs. Cd's just as wet as I am, and tastes of warm cinnamon and lemony honey. Oh, I could easily become addicted to that taste, if she'll let me.
Two fingers slide deep into her clutching pussy as I lash the tip of my tongue back and forth across her clit. She shifts, spreading her legs farther apart, and I add a third, and then a fourth finger. Her entire body is twitching in time with my thrusting fingers and flicking tongue. I can tell she's close; her breathing is coming in short gasps, her hips rising to meet each thrust of my fingers. I bite down lightly on her clit, trapping it between my teeth, and redouble my tongue's movements against it until her entire body stiffens. She grunts softly with each bodily spasm, and I wonder what it will take to make her cry out.
"Babe, wait," she murmurs roughly, hands pressing against the top of my head slightly. "Too much."
Dropping a soft kiss to her inner thigh as I slide my fingers out, I let CD pull me up to lay next to her, head resting on her chest. The steady thrumming of her heart matches my own, and I smile contentedly. With a soft sigh, she tugs at my chin until I meet her gaze again. The naked emotions in her eyes are so intense, so overwhelming, I nearly come again.
"This is why I needed to get sober," I say softly, feeling my own emotions practically choke me.
"Mind-blowing sex?" she asks in a teasing tone, but her eyes are more serious. "Not that I'm complaining, of course."
"I've had a lot of practice and a lot of years to fantasize about it," I admit slowly. When CD yawns and shifts against me, I tighten my grip around her waist. "Don't go back to your apartment tonight, CD. Stay here with me?" She looks like she's going to say something, but I don't let her. "I don't want to wake up alone in the morning and think this was all just a damned dream, or me trying to find solace in some other nameless blonde bimbo that isn't you."
Cd's arms pull me closer, almost painfully so, and she leans in to bestow a soul-searing kiss on me. "I'm not going anywhere, Jinny, I promise. We're in this together, right?"
I nod, unable to get any words past the lump in my throat as I remember her saying those exact words in so many dreams. She smiles and shifts our bodies up toward the pillows, and we awkwardly maneuver the covers over ourselves. Another gentle kiss before exhaustion claims me, and I snuggle into her body again, content at last.
+++++
A knock at the door startles me awake, and I don't know where I am for a long moment. And then I recognize Cd's lanky body beneath mine and smile. The knock sounds again.
"Jin? Did something happen to Cd's Durango?" Casey's voice floats in through the closed door, waking CD, too. "Or did you two finally stop dancing around each other and get your groove on?"
CD gasps in embarrassment and tries to dive under the covers when the doorknob rattles.
"Fuck off, Casey!" I call out to him, and grin at CD.
"Just make sure you're both dressed when you come out for breakfast, okay? There are just some things that a baby brother is not meant to see."
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