Non Monet Me (advise me not)
*sigh of relief and pleasure*
I'm done. I got the professor to sign the drop form, took it to SAS and verified that it will NOT affect my bill or my financial aid. I got my reading assigments done and participated in class discussions all day. I feel like a walking miracle.
I aced the quiz in latin. We translated a short poem about Pandora's box. I was done in less than twenty minutes.
I read Aristophanes play " The Clouds" about Socrates and finally got to say something out loud in my honors class. I asked a quesion in English Lit about Chaucer's use of metaphor in Canterbury tales.
God, I feel so crippled in a class when I haven't done the reading. I feel completely useless. Now that I have from 10:50 to 12:00 to eat lunch and read, I'm gonna do great. Dr. Hicks even commented on how I was in class before him today. "Usually you're just slinking in after class starts" he said. Ah... Sweet Revenge draws near. I'm going to beat him to class every day from now on, because he always sits in my seat when I'm late. Canadians.
Don't worry Adam, school and Sebastian are my first priorities. I was just babbling about meeting someone new because it was really bothering me before. Being with Dave was probably a mistake altogether, but I kept thinking he wasn't the "one". I've had this feeling growing inside me lately that there's a perfect guy out there just for me. Somewhere I haven't been yet maybe -or somewhere I just haven't managed to run into him yet. I don't think I'm supposed to find him for a while. The idea is so exciting though... Someday when I least expect it I'm going to be swept away by a fiery romance and then settle into a comfortable life without the constant anger and tension that my relationships usually come with.
I realize, though, that until I can make myself happy without Mr. Right I'll never be happy WITH him. I have to provide for myself and my son. I have to accomplish something for myself BY myself. Most of all, I have to have control over my self and my life. Once I'm the pilot of this ship I call MARY then only can I decide where to dock... Bad metaphor? Whatever. My point is that there is a time for everything and I'm seriously beginning to think that before I can enjoy a "love" with someone I need to be able to enjoy just plain ol' life without someone.
Besides all that, I'm hoping to transfer to NIU and hopefully live there someday. Maybe after I move to a new place I'll discover a new "pool of applicants" to choose from. Maybe my soulmate is waiting for me in some other city. I hope he's in Chicago.
How cheesy. I just thought "This is the first day of the rest of my life". It's true, though. I've learned a lesson this semester. You have to know when you've bitten off too much. It may be humiliating, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and quit.
Now I'm gonna read some more. =)
I'm done. I got the professor to sign the drop form, took it to SAS and verified that it will NOT affect my bill or my financial aid. I got my reading assigments done and participated in class discussions all day. I feel like a walking miracle.
I aced the quiz in latin. We translated a short poem about Pandora's box. I was done in less than twenty minutes.
I read Aristophanes play " The Clouds" about Socrates and finally got to say something out loud in my honors class. I asked a quesion in English Lit about Chaucer's use of metaphor in Canterbury tales.
God, I feel so crippled in a class when I haven't done the reading. I feel completely useless. Now that I have from 10:50 to 12:00 to eat lunch and read, I'm gonna do great. Dr. Hicks even commented on how I was in class before him today. "Usually you're just slinking in after class starts" he said. Ah... Sweet Revenge draws near. I'm going to beat him to class every day from now on, because he always sits in my seat when I'm late. Canadians.
Don't worry Adam, school and Sebastian are my first priorities. I was just babbling about meeting someone new because it was really bothering me before. Being with Dave was probably a mistake altogether, but I kept thinking he wasn't the "one". I've had this feeling growing inside me lately that there's a perfect guy out there just for me. Somewhere I haven't been yet maybe -or somewhere I just haven't managed to run into him yet. I don't think I'm supposed to find him for a while. The idea is so exciting though... Someday when I least expect it I'm going to be swept away by a fiery romance and then settle into a comfortable life without the constant anger and tension that my relationships usually come with.
I realize, though, that until I can make myself happy without Mr. Right I'll never be happy WITH him. I have to provide for myself and my son. I have to accomplish something for myself BY myself. Most of all, I have to have control over my self and my life. Once I'm the pilot of this ship I call MARY then only can I decide where to dock... Bad metaphor? Whatever. My point is that there is a time for everything and I'm seriously beginning to think that before I can enjoy a "love" with someone I need to be able to enjoy just plain ol' life without someone.
Besides all that, I'm hoping to transfer to NIU and hopefully live there someday. Maybe after I move to a new place I'll discover a new "pool of applicants" to choose from. Maybe my soulmate is waiting for me in some other city. I hope he's in Chicago.
How cheesy. I just thought "This is the first day of the rest of my life". It's true, though. I've learned a lesson this semester. You have to know when you've bitten off too much. It may be humiliating, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and quit.
Now I'm gonna read some more. =)