I'm so therebutterflyx_February 28 2004, 20:02:45 UTC
First off, I have to say that I LOVE reading your journals!!! They're so entertaining!
Second, I totally feel you. I have been in that place recently. Like, random desires to go to church, but not knowing where to go; feeling like someone else really is making things special just for me - even if only for 5 minutes, like a sunset or a beautiful bouquet of flowers for $5.
I actually find it amusing to sit and wonder about things I don't neccessarily understand, such as the environment and the extent and grandeur of it. I actually get very emotional about it. I mean, today was amazingly, undeservingly beautiful. I couldn't get enough of it. I was outside all afternoon. And even though my apartment is a complete shithole and my life is a bit of a mess, this sweet day and being out in it and watching everyone else enjoy it totally made it seem okay. Granted, it could be attributed to general distraction, but I like to think that I have a deeper appreciation for these simple things that no one can control......
I think as far as the human race is concerned, we are overcome with desire to believe in SOMETHING, anything. I mean any diet or fashion trend we blindly follow, so why should it be different for faith? I guarantee that half the people that go to church are just there because they need something to hold onto.
I personally don't believe in one faith, I know that there is some higher power. I feel it. Anyway, I really like the spin you put on this feeling about interacting with other "worlds" and some being able to sense it better than others.
Second, I totally feel you. I have been in that place recently. Like, random desires to go to church, but not knowing where to go; feeling like someone else really is making things special just for me - even if only for 5 minutes, like a sunset or a beautiful bouquet of flowers for $5.
I actually find it amusing to sit and wonder about things I don't neccessarily understand, such as the environment and the extent and grandeur of it. I actually get very emotional about it. I mean, today was amazingly, undeservingly beautiful. I couldn't get enough of it. I was outside all afternoon. And even though my apartment is a complete shithole and my life is a bit of a mess, this sweet day and being out in it and watching everyone else enjoy it totally made it seem okay. Granted, it could be attributed to general distraction, but I like to think that I have a deeper appreciation for these simple things that no one can control......
I think as far as the human race is concerned, we are overcome with desire to believe in SOMETHING, anything. I mean any diet or fashion trend we blindly follow, so why should it be different for faith? I guarantee that half the people that go to church are just there because they need something to hold onto.
I personally don't believe in one faith, I know that there is some higher power. I feel it. Anyway, I really like the spin you put on this feeling about interacting with other "worlds" and some being able to sense it better than others.
sorry this was so long!!
Reply
I love long responses anyway, and it's good to know I'm not out too far on that limb.
Reply
Leave a comment