Fuck this.
I cannot fucking believe this. My report came in yesterday, and Dad talked to me about it just now. Oh, wait, allow me to reiterate; yelled at me for it.
I'M NOT MY FUCKING BROTHER. I NEVER WILL BE. I DON'T WANT TO BE. So why do they expect me to be good at the subjects he is? Is it my fault that he studies Maths and I don't? Is it my fault that they based the scores on the FIRST FIVE WEEKS OF TERM, so obviously I'm not going to get 7As in very many things? I mean, it's considered to be that you're doing brilliantly if you get an average of 6As. We're not even supposed to be considering the number grades, just the letter grades. Fine, I received Bs. I'm really proud of my report, if this is what I'm getting, 5 weeks in.
English: 6A. Top grade.
Geography: 7A. Not remotely surprised, he always was 7A-friendly.
Music: 7A. Again, not at all surprised. I'd be shocked if I'd gotten anything
less, when I play three instruments at performance level and do music theory.
Science: 5B. Based on test score, which I'm fine with. He doesn't think I'm
pushing myself hard enough, and I fully agree.
Maths: 5B. You can't get much higher than that, to be perfectly honest. Not in
the first 5 weeks.
French: 6A. Could've done better, but I'm happy with that, but obviously Dad isn't.
I.T.: 7A. Somewhat surprising, but I got a 7 for the final, so that affected it a lot.
D.T.: 6A. I've been averaging high 6 and 7s, so that was expected. a 7 would've been nice, though.
Art: 6A. Very happy with that. Ms. Kirwan just doesn't give out higher grades than that in the first term, and I haven't hit belowa 5, and that was only for one piece.
History: 5B. I've been away too many times, but my grade are high. So that's dumb. Oh well.
I just wish my parents didn't have higher expectations than I do. It's bad enough when I get a grade like a 5 and don't like it, I don't need them to have even higher standards. It's just not the way it works with me.
What bothers me even more is that, even though they'll be the first ones to deny it, I know they're constantly comparing between my brother and me. 'Oh, he's so good at maths, you can do so much better'. Let's be frank here. I got the message clearly when my report came, which was 6 7As [which is like, genius level], and they were like 'Oh, let's wait for your brother to come back so we can celebrate together'.
Brother comes, weeks pass, then he gets his exam results [all firsts] and instantly we all go on holiday! Oh, let's all forget about Ris and her brilliant report, it obviously doesn't match up to the great Sarbo's results, does it? Oh no, little sisters aren't allowed to get recognition.
I hate being the youngest.
I'M NOT MY FUCKING BROTHER. I NEVER WILL BE. I DON'T WANT TO BE. So why do they expect me to be good at the subjects he is? Is it my fault that he studies Maths and I don't? Is it my fault that they based the scores on the FIRST FIVE WEEKS OF TERM, so obviously I'm not going to get 7As in very many things? I mean, it's considered to be that you're doing brilliantly if you get an average of 6As. We're not even supposed to be considering the number grades, just the letter grades. Fine, I received Bs. I'm really proud of my report, if this is what I'm getting, 5 weeks in.
English: 6A. Top grade.
Geography: 7A. Not remotely surprised, he always was 7A-friendly.
Music: 7A. Again, not at all surprised. I'd be shocked if I'd gotten anything
less, when I play three instruments at performance level and do music theory.
Science: 5B. Based on test score, which I'm fine with. He doesn't think I'm
pushing myself hard enough, and I fully agree.
Maths: 5B. You can't get much higher than that, to be perfectly honest. Not in
the first 5 weeks.
French: 6A. Could've done better, but I'm happy with that, but obviously Dad isn't.
I.T.: 7A. Somewhat surprising, but I got a 7 for the final, so that affected it a lot.
D.T.: 6A. I've been averaging high 6 and 7s, so that was expected. a 7 would've been nice, though.
Art: 6A. Very happy with that. Ms. Kirwan just doesn't give out higher grades than that in the first term, and I haven't hit belowa 5, and that was only for one piece.
History: 5B. I've been away too many times, but my grade are high. So that's dumb. Oh well.
I just wish my parents didn't have higher expectations than I do. It's bad enough when I get a grade like a 5 and don't like it, I don't need them to have even higher standards. It's just not the way it works with me.
What bothers me even more is that, even though they'll be the first ones to deny it, I know they're constantly comparing between my brother and me. 'Oh, he's so good at maths, you can do so much better'. Let's be frank here. I got the message clearly when my report came, which was 6 7As [which is like, genius level], and they were like 'Oh, let's wait for your brother to come back so we can celebrate together'.
Brother comes, weeks pass, then he gets his exam results [all firsts] and instantly we all go on holiday! Oh, let's all forget about Ris and her brilliant report, it obviously doesn't match up to the great Sarbo's results, does it? Oh no, little sisters aren't allowed to get recognition.
I hate being the youngest.