Today is not much better.
I am still in this melancholy mood. Yesterday I got called in to work so that cheered me up a little bit. more money = less stress. After work I just hung out at home untill Tim came and picked me up to go blow shit up. I made a launcher out of a pipe I found in my garage so that made things a bit more interesting. I called it a night earlier than usual just cause I wasn't in a very fun mood. Then I went home and sat online talking and being a lump till 9 am this morning. I got a little sleep and a shower leading up to here, where I type in my journal. My cat is sleeping on my bed and it's so cute. He's got life easy I guess. I read my bible a ton today, over half of Mark. I wanted to read about Jesus's life but I wanted a more sucinct version. I am still lonely and I guess that's the secondary reason for my mood lately. It just adds to the stress of not having my life together. Having someone else there would help me to see things in perspective better. Knowing I'm cared about always makes me seem less like a loser. It also gives me some motivation. Me and Tim are planning our road trip. It's going to be either in september or october and we decided to go out east to New York. It's a place I've always wanted to go and I know a couple cool kids out there. One of those cool kids is a girl I know from friendster named Camille. She's one of those girls that I meet online and would be perfect for me in real life and I develope massive crushes on, but they are always too far away to do anything about. It's especially bad when they like you back. Oh well, I'll probably meet her when I go out there, but I shouldn't get myself too worked up about it like I have in the past. I'm just trying to get through this stressful time alive. once I have my apartment and car and job set then I'm sure a girl will fall into place, when the timings right. I'm still going to keep my eye out for one now though. :) later