Warmth Part 6 - 2/2
Second half of chapter six!
I'm so sorry for how long this took to get out. I've been in Europe for the last few months and its been impossible for me to work on it. But I'm back now and you can expect more updates now. Enjoy!
"Dick…" he murmured, looking at him, winter-green eyes pensive. "What was that this morning?"
Dick froze, chatter ending mid word. He didn't look at Jason, lips pressing tightly together in a hard line.
"What was what?" He asked finally, tone aiming for casual and failing miserably.
"You know what I'm talking about… That thing with Bruce."
The name apparently put Dick on edge, his teeth gritted and his eyes flashing dangerously when he looked at Jason. "I would think you of all people would understand being sick of Bruce's bullshit."
Jason wanted to squirm under Dick's glare, but he forced himself to keep looking him in the eye. "Yeah, yeah I do get that. What I don't get is why you did it that way. That's not your style, Dick."
Dick shrugged and looked away. "Maybe my style needs changing." He muttered.
Jason stared at him, searching for words. "I dunno… Your 'style' seemed to work just fine before…" He said awkwardly, nearly slapping himself in the forehead. He was just damn articulate wasn't he?
Dick sighed and shook his head. "Look, Jaybird…. Let's just go back to my apartment, okay? I want to relax a bit before I go on patrol tonight."
Jason looked surprised. "Are you sure you want to go on patrol? I mean, it isn't a great time…"
That glare turned back on him and he shut up fast.
"I've put it off too long. Crime doesn't rest just because I'm having a bad time."
That was such a Batman thing to say. It really was. And Jason was struggling with this attitude change, struggling to reconcile the man who'd tenderly guided him through his own trauma with… this. He didn't know this man. He wasn't sure he liked him. Still, he found himself at a loss for what to say as he followed Dick home. He was feeling lost in general, not knowing how to reach out the way Dick had reached out to him. He'd thought last night would be enough to pull Dick out of this. Normally he was so resilient, things just bounced off of him.
He hadn't known Dick had a breaking point.
He prayed silently that this wasn't it.
He seemed to be doing a lot of praying lately…
/
Once they were suited up and heading out Jason was starting to feel a little more normal. Dick had agreed to patrol together as long as Jason played nice and considering how Jason had ended up playing by Bat rules for the last few solo patrols anyway he figured he could handle it. Dick was keeping up his usual chatter, which was excruciatingly comforting for Jay.
He got a kiss before they escaped into the night. Dick tasted like mint and sadness, a certain saltiness to his lips like he'd been swallowing tears. But now wasn't the time to focus on it. He slipped the helmet on and they were off into the dark, on the tail of a drug dealer who was carefully killing his way through all the prostitutes in Bludhaven. Dick had been tracking him for a while and, even with his few days of wallowing in retrospective trauma, he nearly had him. If they pushed it, they could have this man off the streets tonight, and hopefully save a few women from his clutches.
Jason watched as Dick put on his game face, serious and sly, coaxing information out of drug-ravaged whores who would have never spoken to any authority if it weren't for Dick's considerable powers of persuasion. Jason hung back for the most part, watching Nightwing's back, gun at the ready and more than prepared to do what was necessary. His brother might have a great game face, but he wasn't at the top of his game just now.
Still, they had a new lead within hours, and any investigator would tell you that was nothing short of a miracle to pull off. Dick was sort of incredible that way, and Jason's intimidation factor was working in their favour as well, making the process go faster.
You didn't mess with Nightwing if you knew him. If you didn't know him… well, it might be tempting.
But you didn't fuck with Red Hood.
People sensed that sort of thing. So nobody gave in to temptation tonight. Nightwing's partner was packing serious heat and serious intent, together they managed to get everything they needed to nab this sick bastard.
Tonight, no one else was dying.
Well, hopefully, anyway…
/
It was nearly dawn when things went to hell.
Which was, let's face it, kind of a pattern in Jason's life. Things never got to go right for him. He was just karma's bitch, he supposed.
Still, had he given any thought to how this night might go to hell, this wouldn't have been what he'd expected. Hell, this wouldn't even have made the top ten of things he might expect.
After all, how could anyone anticipate trying to talk Nightwing out of killing someone?
God, this was so wrong…
/
The darkness was nearly hiding Nightwing from his sight, but the blue gave him away, the bright stripe of an arm, elegant, half-striped fingers wrapped around the handle of the gun. One of Jason's guns no less, and he still didn't know when or how Dick had gotten it out of the holster, but the move was premeditated enough to make his blood run cold.
"Nightwing… Come on. This isn't how you do things… You were the one who was trying to get me to play by the rules, don't pull this shit now!" he yelled at him. Because when Jason was backed in a corner with no idea what to do, he got angry. It was easiest. It masked the smell of fear on him.
Nightwing's face was scarily impassive, staring at the bloodied, helpless man who was bound before him, eyes wide with panic, muttering himself hoarse in urgent ramblings behind the gag. He wasn't going anywhere, and he was staring down death in the form of the gun barrel currently pressed to his jaw.
Dick's voice was like ice when he spoke. "He deserves it. We both know it. If you were the one working this case you wouldn't bother chit-chatting about it, Hood, you'd just kill him. Why bother talking me out of it?"
Jason nearly whimpered, having that cold tone directed at him was like having every bit of warmth stolen from his blood. He swallowed thickly. "Yeah. Yeah, he deserves it. He's scum who doesn't deserve to live. But this isn't you, Nightwing. This isn't how you do things…"
Dick glanced at him. His lenses were down and his eyes were boring into Jason like he could cut through him just with his gaze. Jason was already feeling like he had, pain lancing through him like an oozing wound, bleeding through him. There was nothing of the man he'd been to the movies with earlier in those eyes. There was none of the man that had been such an integral part of who he was and who he had once wanted to be.
When Nightwing spoke again, Jason was too delirious with the soul-deep pain to understand.
"It's hard for you, isn't it?"
"What?" Jason's tone was confused, shaking his helmeted head slowly.
Nightwing waved his free hand casually, like they were in the midst of a light conversation. "Killing. It's hard for you. You don't want to take people's lives. I see that now. You don't do it because you enjoy it, or because it's easy. You do it because you honestly believe it's the right thing to do… You force yourself to kill them even though it's hard for you…" he smiled faintly and Jason nearly choked at the dead blackness of his eyes.
"Let me explain something to you, then, Hood. Something you never understood about Batman, or me…" He turned his gaze back on the man whimpering and begging in front of him. "The reason why we chose not to kill, why we couldn't make exceptions to the rule, why even though we wanted to we couldn't kill the ones that deserved it…"
He turned back to Jason, gun sliding up from the man's jaw to his temple. "The reason, Little Wing, is not because of any moral feelings about it.
"It's because it is really, really easy for us to kill."
And with that he pulled the trigger.
Sorry about the ending, I know you all probably hate me for that cliffhanger, but it just worked too well for me to not leave it there.
About Dick's words about Jason, I figured this part out in a stroke of inspiration and it really makes sense to me. Jason truly believes in what he is doing and that's why he does it the way he does. I don't think he takes any real pleasure in killing people, but its a part of what he believes he needs to do. Any thoughts? Agree? Disagree?