[FIC] Even in the rain, my love won't be lost
Title: Even in the rain, my love wont be lost
Author: are_in
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG
Genre: AU, Tragedy
Disclaimer: I love the boys…and they love me back (in dreams)
Summary: Now, I’m taking everything with me…
Warning: non-beta. Implied of character death.
AN 1: Based on the manga ‘Ame nimo Mayuwanai’ by Honjou Rie. This is my first fic ever…so please be kind to me.^^
Ahhh…I can feel my pulse weakening…
My breathing becomes short…
My eyelids heavy…
But I don’t feel any pain…
Why is that…What is happening to me?
I can’t say “I’m home” to you.
However I’m happy. I’m happy and grateful for everything that happens to me.
Meeting and knowing you is a miracle that happen to me.
Falling in love with you is something that I never expect to happen. And I’m really, really grateful for that.
But I’m really sorry…I’m taking all our love with me…
~~~
It’s all started on that fateful day.
Students of class 3-B had just finish their gym class. They were all cramped in the small changing room, chatting, joking, fooling around with one another.
“I like Erika-chan.” Koki, one of the student, suddenly exclaim loudly.
The was a moment of silence until one particular “Ehhhh” was chorused loudly by the other student.
“Erika from class D? Are you blind?” Nakamaru asked.
“Hey, watch your mouth.” Koki protested.
“Honestly, what did you see in her.” Another student, Junno, butt in.
“Well, I saw her taking off her earring…and it kinda sexy.” Koki said, blushing madly.
Seeing Koki’s reaction, a loud “oww” can be heard from the changing room.
“How about you Ueda, Kame. Who do you like?” Koki, trying to avoid from becoming a teasing object, asked.
“No one in particular.” Ueda said.
“Well….” Kame trailed off, realizing all eyes were trained on him. He looked at each of his friend and they looked back at him expectantly. “Not gonna tell.” He stuck out his tongue to the other.
“Why you little…No matter what you gonna tell us, whether in easy way or hard way…You choose.” Ueda threaten. Still Kame chose to ignore his friends, starting to change his clothes.
“The hard way it seems.” And before Kame can comprehend on what was happening, he found himself on the floor, laughing his lung out and trying to get away from the devilish hands that were tickling him from every angle.
“Ok..Ok..I give up..hahaha…stop…I’ll tell…hahaha…I’ll tell…stop.” Kame let out between his laugh. Tears were threatening to fall down. He tried to squirm his way out from his friends.
Kame sit up and wipe his tears away after his friend free him from their torturous hands. “Ok I’ll tell. Geez you guys are mean.” He said between his ragging breaths.
“You should choose the easy way. That will save us the trouble.” Ueda smirked.
“Then who is it.” Koki interrupt before Kame could answer Ueda. Knowing these two, the bickering will take long and Kame will escape from answering them.
“Err..it’s Maki.” Kame said. “I think.” He add quietly.
“Dude, didn’t you know…”
“Just yesterday, Maki and Jin…”
“Didn’t I tell you?” Before those two can finish their sentence, another familiar voice interrupt them, making Kame’s heart skip a beat. Ha turned around, seeing Jin standing at the doorway.
“Maki and I started dating since yesterday. Did you forget Kame.” Jin asked. His face showed no emotion.
A pregnant silence fill the changing room. The other student still, looking at both Jin and Kame. Kame stared at Jin for a long time.
“I know that, but it doesn’t meant I’m giving up.” The silence was broke by Kame answer. He stared at Jin challenging. The other student sweatdropped. Jin stared back at Kame, and suddenly his lips quirk forming a smirk.
“We will see that.” said Jin.
~~~
3 years has pass since that day. They had finished their high school and now in their final year at university. Since that day, the three of them, Jin, Kame and Maki had become close to each other and enter the same university. Maki was still trying hard pursuing his carrier in modeling. Jin and Kame were having their lunch when they saw Maki approaching them.
“Hey Jin…Kamenashi-kun.” She greet cheerfully.
“Are you on the way to your shoot?” Jin asked. Maki nodded.
“You must be so used to the glamour world now right.” Kame asked.
“Not even close. It’s make my head spin.” She laugh.
“Well you better get use to it quick. You have a reputation to uphold, don’t you.” Tease Kame, laughing as well.
“Oh please no more pressure. It’s really gotten to my head.”She pouted.” Oh well I better go now if I don’t want to be late. See you guys tomorrow.” She waved and started to walk off.
Kame waved back, smiling widely, and unbeknownst to him, Jin was watching him.
“You still don’t give up don’t you.” Jin kicked his shin.
“Shut up.” Kame hissed
“Why should I.” Jin countered back.
And the bickering continue….
~~~
The next day, after Kame had finish his class, he walk around the campus, looking for both Maki and Jin, since they had promise to have lunch together. It had become a habit for them to have whether lunch or dinner together. He hum his favourite song softly while looking for them.
“Hay, have you seen Jin.” He asked one of Jin’s classmate after he was tired looking for them around the campus.
“I think the last time I saw him, he still in the lcture room. With Nishiyama-kun.”
“Oh thanks.” With that Kame walk off looking for the couple.
As he was approaching the room, yells and shout can be heard from inside. He recognized that voices as Jin’s and Maki’s. He top-toed to the door. He knows that it’s not appropriate for him to eavesdrop but he couldn’t help it. They’re his friend and he need to stop them if things became worse. Behind the door, he can hear Jin yelling at Maki about something and Maki’s sobbed.
“What the hell is this?” A loud thud can be heard from inside as if something is being thrown and hitting the door.
“Didn’t you promise that you would never pose for men’s magazine. Can’t you see how worried I am to you?” Jin shouted in anger.
“But…” maki’s voice was low, barely heard from behind the door.
“But…what? Thay even published our university’s name. That would make you an easy target for stalker. Have you think about that.” Jin cut Maki off. He was definitely furious as he saw Maki’s picture in one of the men’s magazine, with complete the details of her.
“I was just doing my job. As a model. I don’t know about the details and it is not in my control of where they gonna published the picture.” Maki tried to explain.
The silence stretch in until Jin’s voice was heard.
“Fine. Do what your job asked you to do. Just remember, I told you so.” As soon as the sentence finish, the door was opened from inside. Kame hide behind the door and saw Maki running outside. She was wiping his tears.
“Maki…” Kame tried to call her, but she ignore him and continue to run away.
Kame slowly walked inside the room. “Jin what happened?” He asked.
“Can’t you see. We are drifting apart.” Jin said quietly. His face was full of sadness. Kame stunned at his place. Unable to form any word to comfort his friend. He look at Jin trying to think of what to say.
“Go find her. She need you now.” Jin said breaking the silence.
“But, how about you?” Kame asked hesitantly.
Jin turned his back to Kame, facing the window, looking outside. “I’m fine.” He said without facing Kame.
“O…Okay…If you said so.” Kame slowly turned around. Before he start walking, he turned back to look at Jin, and his heart clench seeing Jin. His posture was full of defeat. Kame hesitantly starts to walking away, looking for Maki.
~~~
“I know Jin is worried about me.” Maki started slowly. After looking around the campus for fifteen minutes, Kame finally found Maki, sitting alone at the stairs by the entrance of their campus.
“But, I want to follow my dream. Is it wrong to chase after a wonderful dream?” She added after a thought. Kame looked at her. “He said he will support me but now I’m on my own.” Maki said sadly.
“It’s not wrong Maki.” Kame said. “Of course he will support you; however, he is your boyfriend. Everyone who is his shoes will get worry as well. He care about you. A lot. You’re the most important person to him. He…”He was stopped abruptly when he felt Maki’s hand touching his.
“I know that. I’ll… have to think this through. But for now, can I stay like this?” Maki asked. Tears streaming down her face. Kame stay silent. His hand sat below Maki’s, conveying silent comfort to her.
And unknown to both of them, another person was silently watching them from behind the wall. He was fuming with anger and rage, seeing their closeness.
~~~
After the incident, things around them became awkward. While Kame and Maki try to talk things out, Jin continues with his own business. This thing had saddened Kame. The three of them used to be close to each other and he hope that both of them will get back together. However, it just seems Kame’s one-sided wishes since Jin doesn’t seem to try to consider things up. Unfortunately, after a few days of awkward silence, they were officially broke up.
~~~
Maki told Kame about the break up. The news was not really a shock for Kame, but he was wondering the reason for Jin to easily gave up just like that.
“Thanks you for being with me Kamenashi-kun. I know you and Jin are best friend since high school but you had stay with me during my hard days. I’m rally grateful for that.” Maki said, smiling.
“I’m sorry for not being able to help you out.” Kame Said quietly.
“Oh no, I’m the one should apologize. I had trouble you a lot. Please take care of Jin. He’ll be lost without you, kamenashi-Kun.” Kame looked at her, speechless.
“When we’re still together, he always talks about you.” She added, chuckling, when she saw the confuse look on Kame’s face.
“Ah…” That because I told him I like you. Kame thought.
Did he give up easily because of me?
~~~
“Go ahead…” Jin said one day. There was only Kame and Jin that left in the lecture room.
“Eh”
“Go after Maki. Don’t worry about me. She need you now.” Jin added.
Kame look down, founding that the tip of his shoes is more interesting. He was sad. He was confuse. He didn’t know what to make out. Hearing Jin said something like that make his heart ache.
“I…I can’t.” He said slowly.
“Why not…” Jin was shocked hearing what Kame said. “Haven’t you always like her? Isn’t you’re staying with me all this time because of love?”
“Yeas, it is. However it wasn’t because of Maki.” Kame mumble. If not because how close they are sitting, Jin would have missed that. Jin’s eyes went wide because of shock.
“What do you meant. It wouldn’t be me, right?” Jin’s voice was shaky. Kame didn’t know whether it was because if the shock or the anger. He didn’t dare to face Jin.
“You’re kidding ,right? I thought that if I broke up with Maki, you would get together with her. You’ve been lying to me all this time.” Jin shouted.
“Jin, I…”
“I thought we’re rival. I thought the reason you stay with me is to get close to her.” Jin cut Kame off before he can finish. Kame was still looking down. He didn’t dare to raise his head up and met with Jin’s angry face. He wouldn’t be able to take it if he sees hatred in Jin’s eyes. He can’t take it…. Seeing that Kame still keep silent and hasn’t raised his head up, Jin turn around and storm off, leaving Kame alone to dwell with his feeling.
Oh my God, Oh my God…what have I done. Kame thought. Tears streaming down his face without him realizing, dropping on the concrete floor soundlessly. Is this my fault.
~~~
In Jin’s apartment.
He was staring blankly outside his window. Watching the light that illuminating the city at night. His mind was blank. He didn’t know what to make out of the event that had happened earlier that day. He remember how Kame had always giving him advise when he was having problem with Maki, the way Kame encouraging and supporting him in matter regarding his relationship with Maki
“Did Maki went to her audition today.” An eighteen-years-old Kame asked.
They were sitting on the rooftop during their break, waiting the bell for the next class ringing. Jin was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall while Kame was kicking a soccer ball back and forth.Jib was supporting a gloomy expression making Kame curious on what was bothering him.
“What-worrying about her. No need to worry dude. She’s your girlfriend.” Kame try to comforting him.
“I know. But, when she enters the entertainment world, won’t she forget about me. I meant, I only going to be a hindrance to her.” Jin voice out his insecurities. Kame was stunned for a moment when he heard. His heart ache, knowing that Jin will never felt the same towards him.
“Of course not. If not for you, Jin, Maki wouldn’t be able to do it. That’s why I could never get between you two.” Kame said, faking a sigh. He looked at Jin and smile brightly.
“Come on. You’ll cheer for Maki and I’ll cheer for you. Isn’t that a good deal?”Jin smile hearing Kame’s words.
A loud screech brought Jin back from the memory lane. All this time, the one who’s hurting isn’t me.
~~~
“Hey, Akanishi-kun.” Jin was stopped by a sudden call of his name. “Yes.”
“Have you seen Kame. He hasn’t been attending the lectures for 3 days.” The one name Keita, if he remembers correctly, asked.
“Kame? No I haven’t see him lately. What do you mean he’s not attending lectures. What happened to him?” Jin asked frantically.
“That’s what we’re trying to figure out. I thought you would know since you guys are practically attached to hip. We tried calling his phone but no one answer and we didn’t know where he live.” Keita explain. “You know where he lives right. Do you mind finding out what’s going on for us.” He added.
“Okay, I’ll check on him.” Jin agreed.
“Thanks dude.”
~~~
Jin, after his last class ended, went to Kame’s apartment. On his way, he tried calling Kame’s phone only to hear the endless beep. He was worried. He tried calling again and again and again only to receive the same answer. Damn it, Kame. Come on. Pick up. Please. Arriving in front of Kame’s apartment building, Jin, without wasting time, ran straight to the staircase and climbed up the stairs to Kame’s apartment. He knocked frantically on the door. Hoping, wishing that Kame was home and would open the door.
Kame, on the other hand, was lying quietly in his apartment. His phone kept ringing, but he ignores it. Suddenly, he hear frantic knock on his door. He ignored it, knowing whoever outside will eventually gives up and leave, thinking that nobody was inside. Unfortunately for him, the frantic knocked continue. Worried that his neighbor will get annoyed by the loud banging, he slowly got up and went to open the door. When he open the door, he was shocked to see Jin standing outside the door.
“Jin…” His sentence was cut short when Jin suddenly grabs his shoulders.
“ Kame, are you okay. Did you lose weight because of me. What have I done? You…” Jin wasn’t able to finish his word. His body was trembling. Kame looks at Jin. He was lost for words. His mind was full of question, but he wasn’t able to voice out.
“Kame, I’m sorry. I…I only thought about myself. All this time…you’re the one who’s been hurting. Sorry. I’m so sorry Kame.” Jin closes his eyes, trying to prvent his tears from leaking out. His holds on Kame’s arms tighten. “But I can’t lose you Kame. I…I can’t imagine my life without you.” Jin kneeled. His hold on Kame still hasn’t loose. His shoulders shook a little.
After Jin had calm down, Kame brought Jin into his apartment. The sat on the floor side by side, leaning against the bed. They stay in silence but it was no an uncomfortable silence.
“Honestly…” Jin break the silence “a lot of thing had happened. I wasn’t able to sort thing out. I really don’t know what to do about us Kame.” He looked at kame.
“No. It’s okay. I’m not…I’m not asking for anything.” Kame said. “After all, this is my fault for misleading you” he added. Jin was left speechless. He hesitantly brought his hand up and clasped it with Kame. To say that Kame was shocked with Jin’s sudden action was an understatement. He looks at Jin with wide eyes.
“Don’t say that. I’m the one who do not understand anything.” He hides his face between his knees. “Please, just give me some time to think this through.”
“Sure Jin.” The there was silence since both of them were drown in their own thought.
The sudden splatter sound hitting the windows brought the back from their own world. Kame walks to the window to look outside. “It’s raining.” He said.
“Seems like I’m not going anywhere.” Jin too look at the window. Outside the rain was pouring heavily.
“Just stay for the night.” Kame said.
“Are you sure?” Jin asked.”I don’t want to bother you.” He added.
“Since when did you start to act like this? It’s not like you never stay over. For reminder, you always come here when you’re drunk. And it was the worst. You’re not only drunk, but you also kept rambling incoherent words. When you slept, you snore. Loudly I tell you.” Hearing what Kame said, Jin blush..
“I did not snore.”He protest albeit hesitantly. Seeing Jin’s reaction, Kame laughed loudly making Jin more embarrassed. He stared at Kame laughing his lungs out. Unconsciously, a small smile stretch on his lips.
Kame, after calming down from his laughter asked, “What”
“No..nothing.” Jin stammered. “I just remember the first time we met. I was taken aback by your smile. I just remember that…. out of the blue.” Jin explain. Kame stunned. His cheek suddenly felt hotter than usual.
“How about you. What is your first impression of me?” Jin asked quite eagerly.
“I already told you that.” He mumble. His cheek became redder. Jin look at Kame. His heart skip a bit and he wonder why.
“What with that expression.” Jin playfully nudge Kame’s head. And their playful bickering started until they realize that their faces were too close to each other. They stare into each others eyes without blinking. Their heart beat raising. No body knows and no body realize who was the one who took the initiative closing their gap, but as they realize it, both of their lips had met. Kame felt Jin’s tongue lick his bottom lip. He gasps in surprise and Jin takes the chance to enter his tongue into Kame’s mouth. As he felt Jin’s tongue in his mouth, Kame grip Jin’s shirt tightly. He close his eyes, letting Jin to dominate the kiss. Jin entangles his fingers in Kame’s hair. Jin explore Kame’s cavern, roaming his tongue to each nook and crook of Kame’s mouth. Tasting his sweet taste. The kiss come to an end after air was needed. They stared to each other as the gasp for breath. Silence surround them for the nth time.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. I shouldn’t do this until I sort things out.”Jin said quietly.
Kame grip Jin’s wrist as look down. “Even if you don’t love me, it’s okay. However, if you can, I want to do it with you.” Kame said quietly. His hand that was holding Jin’s wrist tremble. Jin was shocked. He look at Kame only to see a determine look in his eyes.
~~~
The next day, the rain was still pouring. Kame was ready to go for his lecture.
“So, you’re only going for the first lecture, right?” Jin asked.
“Yes. I’ll be home before lunchtime.” Kame answered. “You should take a nap.”
“Hey, can I…canI stay here until you get back?” Jin asked hesitantly.
“Sure.”Kame smiled. “I’ll get our bento on my way home then. I better get going.” He added as he looks at his watch.
~~~
Everything going to be alright. We’ll be together again like before. Jin didn’t say anything. May be he wants to forget and stay as friend. That’s okay too. After all, it is for.the best if he forget about me.
“Are you Maki’s boyfriend?” Kame’s muse was cut short when someone blocked his way.
“What?” Kame asked.
“I won’t allow it. You can’t monopolize her.” With that said, the man took steps forward.
Kame didn’t know what had happened. And when he realizes it, he was lying down on the road. There was pain coming from his stomach. He coughs and felt something trickle down his chin. His eyes was looking straight to the sky, watching the rain pouring down onto him.
What should I do Jin? He thought. He touched his stomach and saw blood as he raised up his hand.
I don’t understand why this is happening. Is this some kind of punishment? But, I’m glad. I finally overcome my pain and face my feeling for Jin. Now, I’m taking everything with me…
The memories,
My love for him
And this happiness will never be lost……
AN 2: Comments are love…^
^
Author: are_in
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG
Genre: AU, Tragedy
Disclaimer: I love the boys…and they love me back (in dreams)
Summary: Now, I’m taking everything with me…
Warning: non-beta. Implied of character death.
AN 1: Based on the manga ‘Ame nimo Mayuwanai’ by Honjou Rie. This is my first fic ever…so please be kind to me.^^
Ahhh…I can feel my pulse weakening…
My breathing becomes short…
My eyelids heavy…
But I don’t feel any pain…
Why is that…What is happening to me?
I can’t say “I’m home” to you.
However I’m happy. I’m happy and grateful for everything that happens to me.
Meeting and knowing you is a miracle that happen to me.
Falling in love with you is something that I never expect to happen. And I’m really, really grateful for that.
But I’m really sorry…I’m taking all our love with me…
~~~
It’s all started on that fateful day.
Students of class 3-B had just finish their gym class. They were all cramped in the small changing room, chatting, joking, fooling around with one another.
“I like Erika-chan.” Koki, one of the student, suddenly exclaim loudly.
The was a moment of silence until one particular “Ehhhh” was chorused loudly by the other student.
“Erika from class D? Are you blind?” Nakamaru asked.
“Hey, watch your mouth.” Koki protested.
“Honestly, what did you see in her.” Another student, Junno, butt in.
“Well, I saw her taking off her earring…and it kinda sexy.” Koki said, blushing madly.
Seeing Koki’s reaction, a loud “oww” can be heard from the changing room.
“How about you Ueda, Kame. Who do you like?” Koki, trying to avoid from becoming a teasing object, asked.
“No one in particular.” Ueda said.
“Well….” Kame trailed off, realizing all eyes were trained on him. He looked at each of his friend and they looked back at him expectantly. “Not gonna tell.” He stuck out his tongue to the other.
“Why you little…No matter what you gonna tell us, whether in easy way or hard way…You choose.” Ueda threaten. Still Kame chose to ignore his friends, starting to change his clothes.
“The hard way it seems.” And before Kame can comprehend on what was happening, he found himself on the floor, laughing his lung out and trying to get away from the devilish hands that were tickling him from every angle.
“Ok..Ok..I give up..hahaha…stop…I’ll tell…hahaha…I’ll tell…stop.” Kame let out between his laugh. Tears were threatening to fall down. He tried to squirm his way out from his friends.
Kame sit up and wipe his tears away after his friend free him from their torturous hands. “Ok I’ll tell. Geez you guys are mean.” He said between his ragging breaths.
“You should choose the easy way. That will save us the trouble.” Ueda smirked.
“Then who is it.” Koki interrupt before Kame could answer Ueda. Knowing these two, the bickering will take long and Kame will escape from answering them.
“Err..it’s Maki.” Kame said. “I think.” He add quietly.
“Dude, didn’t you know…”
“Just yesterday, Maki and Jin…”
“Didn’t I tell you?” Before those two can finish their sentence, another familiar voice interrupt them, making Kame’s heart skip a beat. Ha turned around, seeing Jin standing at the doorway.
“Maki and I started dating since yesterday. Did you forget Kame.” Jin asked. His face showed no emotion.
A pregnant silence fill the changing room. The other student still, looking at both Jin and Kame. Kame stared at Jin for a long time.
“I know that, but it doesn’t meant I’m giving up.” The silence was broke by Kame answer. He stared at Jin challenging. The other student sweatdropped. Jin stared back at Kame, and suddenly his lips quirk forming a smirk.
“We will see that.” said Jin.
~~~
3 years has pass since that day. They had finished their high school and now in their final year at university. Since that day, the three of them, Jin, Kame and Maki had become close to each other and enter the same university. Maki was still trying hard pursuing his carrier in modeling. Jin and Kame were having their lunch when they saw Maki approaching them.
“Hey Jin…Kamenashi-kun.” She greet cheerfully.
“Are you on the way to your shoot?” Jin asked. Maki nodded.
“You must be so used to the glamour world now right.” Kame asked.
“Not even close. It’s make my head spin.” She laugh.
“Well you better get use to it quick. You have a reputation to uphold, don’t you.” Tease Kame, laughing as well.
“Oh please no more pressure. It’s really gotten to my head.”She pouted.” Oh well I better go now if I don’t want to be late. See you guys tomorrow.” She waved and started to walk off.
Kame waved back, smiling widely, and unbeknownst to him, Jin was watching him.
“You still don’t give up don’t you.” Jin kicked his shin.
“Shut up.” Kame hissed
“Why should I.” Jin countered back.
And the bickering continue….
~~~
The next day, after Kame had finish his class, he walk around the campus, looking for both Maki and Jin, since they had promise to have lunch together. It had become a habit for them to have whether lunch or dinner together. He hum his favourite song softly while looking for them.
“Hay, have you seen Jin.” He asked one of Jin’s classmate after he was tired looking for them around the campus.
“I think the last time I saw him, he still in the lcture room. With Nishiyama-kun.”
“Oh thanks.” With that Kame walk off looking for the couple.
As he was approaching the room, yells and shout can be heard from inside. He recognized that voices as Jin’s and Maki’s. He top-toed to the door. He knows that it’s not appropriate for him to eavesdrop but he couldn’t help it. They’re his friend and he need to stop them if things became worse. Behind the door, he can hear Jin yelling at Maki about something and Maki’s sobbed.
“What the hell is this?” A loud thud can be heard from inside as if something is being thrown and hitting the door.
“Didn’t you promise that you would never pose for men’s magazine. Can’t you see how worried I am to you?” Jin shouted in anger.
“But…” maki’s voice was low, barely heard from behind the door.
“But…what? Thay even published our university’s name. That would make you an easy target for stalker. Have you think about that.” Jin cut Maki off. He was definitely furious as he saw Maki’s picture in one of the men’s magazine, with complete the details of her.
“I was just doing my job. As a model. I don’t know about the details and it is not in my control of where they gonna published the picture.” Maki tried to explain.
The silence stretch in until Jin’s voice was heard.
“Fine. Do what your job asked you to do. Just remember, I told you so.” As soon as the sentence finish, the door was opened from inside. Kame hide behind the door and saw Maki running outside. She was wiping his tears.
“Maki…” Kame tried to call her, but she ignore him and continue to run away.
Kame slowly walked inside the room. “Jin what happened?” He asked.
“Can’t you see. We are drifting apart.” Jin said quietly. His face was full of sadness. Kame stunned at his place. Unable to form any word to comfort his friend. He look at Jin trying to think of what to say.
“Go find her. She need you now.” Jin said breaking the silence.
“But, how about you?” Kame asked hesitantly.
Jin turned his back to Kame, facing the window, looking outside. “I’m fine.” He said without facing Kame.
“O…Okay…If you said so.” Kame slowly turned around. Before he start walking, he turned back to look at Jin, and his heart clench seeing Jin. His posture was full of defeat. Kame hesitantly starts to walking away, looking for Maki.
~~~
“I know Jin is worried about me.” Maki started slowly. After looking around the campus for fifteen minutes, Kame finally found Maki, sitting alone at the stairs by the entrance of their campus.
“But, I want to follow my dream. Is it wrong to chase after a wonderful dream?” She added after a thought. Kame looked at her. “He said he will support me but now I’m on my own.” Maki said sadly.
“It’s not wrong Maki.” Kame said. “Of course he will support you; however, he is your boyfriend. Everyone who is his shoes will get worry as well. He care about you. A lot. You’re the most important person to him. He…”He was stopped abruptly when he felt Maki’s hand touching his.
“I know that. I’ll… have to think this through. But for now, can I stay like this?” Maki asked. Tears streaming down her face. Kame stay silent. His hand sat below Maki’s, conveying silent comfort to her.
And unknown to both of them, another person was silently watching them from behind the wall. He was fuming with anger and rage, seeing their closeness.
~~~
After the incident, things around them became awkward. While Kame and Maki try to talk things out, Jin continues with his own business. This thing had saddened Kame. The three of them used to be close to each other and he hope that both of them will get back together. However, it just seems Kame’s one-sided wishes since Jin doesn’t seem to try to consider things up. Unfortunately, after a few days of awkward silence, they were officially broke up.
~~~
Maki told Kame about the break up. The news was not really a shock for Kame, but he was wondering the reason for Jin to easily gave up just like that.
“Thanks you for being with me Kamenashi-kun. I know you and Jin are best friend since high school but you had stay with me during my hard days. I’m rally grateful for that.” Maki said, smiling.
“I’m sorry for not being able to help you out.” Kame Said quietly.
“Oh no, I’m the one should apologize. I had trouble you a lot. Please take care of Jin. He’ll be lost without you, kamenashi-Kun.” Kame looked at her, speechless.
“When we’re still together, he always talks about you.” She added, chuckling, when she saw the confuse look on Kame’s face.
“Ah…” That because I told him I like you. Kame thought.
Did he give up easily because of me?
~~~
“Go ahead…” Jin said one day. There was only Kame and Jin that left in the lecture room.
“Eh”
“Go after Maki. Don’t worry about me. She need you now.” Jin added.
Kame look down, founding that the tip of his shoes is more interesting. He was sad. He was confuse. He didn’t know what to make out. Hearing Jin said something like that make his heart ache.
“I…I can’t.” He said slowly.
“Why not…” Jin was shocked hearing what Kame said. “Haven’t you always like her? Isn’t you’re staying with me all this time because of love?”
“Yeas, it is. However it wasn’t because of Maki.” Kame mumble. If not because how close they are sitting, Jin would have missed that. Jin’s eyes went wide because of shock.
“What do you meant. It wouldn’t be me, right?” Jin’s voice was shaky. Kame didn’t know whether it was because if the shock or the anger. He didn’t dare to face Jin.
“You’re kidding ,right? I thought that if I broke up with Maki, you would get together with her. You’ve been lying to me all this time.” Jin shouted.
“Jin, I…”
“I thought we’re rival. I thought the reason you stay with me is to get close to her.” Jin cut Kame off before he can finish. Kame was still looking down. He didn’t dare to raise his head up and met with Jin’s angry face. He wouldn’t be able to take it if he sees hatred in Jin’s eyes. He can’t take it…. Seeing that Kame still keep silent and hasn’t raised his head up, Jin turn around and storm off, leaving Kame alone to dwell with his feeling.
Oh my God, Oh my God…what have I done. Kame thought. Tears streaming down his face without him realizing, dropping on the concrete floor soundlessly. Is this my fault.
~~~
In Jin’s apartment.
He was staring blankly outside his window. Watching the light that illuminating the city at night. His mind was blank. He didn’t know what to make out of the event that had happened earlier that day. He remember how Kame had always giving him advise when he was having problem with Maki, the way Kame encouraging and supporting him in matter regarding his relationship with Maki
“Did Maki went to her audition today.” An eighteen-years-old Kame asked.
They were sitting on the rooftop during their break, waiting the bell for the next class ringing. Jin was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall while Kame was kicking a soccer ball back and forth.Jib was supporting a gloomy expression making Kame curious on what was bothering him.
“What-worrying about her. No need to worry dude. She’s your girlfriend.” Kame try to comforting him.
“I know. But, when she enters the entertainment world, won’t she forget about me. I meant, I only going to be a hindrance to her.” Jin voice out his insecurities. Kame was stunned for a moment when he heard. His heart ache, knowing that Jin will never felt the same towards him.
“Of course not. If not for you, Jin, Maki wouldn’t be able to do it. That’s why I could never get between you two.” Kame said, faking a sigh. He looked at Jin and smile brightly.
“Come on. You’ll cheer for Maki and I’ll cheer for you. Isn’t that a good deal?”Jin smile hearing Kame’s words.
A loud screech brought Jin back from the memory lane. All this time, the one who’s hurting isn’t me.
~~~
“Hey, Akanishi-kun.” Jin was stopped by a sudden call of his name. “Yes.”
“Have you seen Kame. He hasn’t been attending the lectures for 3 days.” The one name Keita, if he remembers correctly, asked.
“Kame? No I haven’t see him lately. What do you mean he’s not attending lectures. What happened to him?” Jin asked frantically.
“That’s what we’re trying to figure out. I thought you would know since you guys are practically attached to hip. We tried calling his phone but no one answer and we didn’t know where he live.” Keita explain. “You know where he lives right. Do you mind finding out what’s going on for us.” He added.
“Okay, I’ll check on him.” Jin agreed.
“Thanks dude.”
~~~
Jin, after his last class ended, went to Kame’s apartment. On his way, he tried calling Kame’s phone only to hear the endless beep. He was worried. He tried calling again and again and again only to receive the same answer. Damn it, Kame. Come on. Pick up. Please. Arriving in front of Kame’s apartment building, Jin, without wasting time, ran straight to the staircase and climbed up the stairs to Kame’s apartment. He knocked frantically on the door. Hoping, wishing that Kame was home and would open the door.
Kame, on the other hand, was lying quietly in his apartment. His phone kept ringing, but he ignores it. Suddenly, he hear frantic knock on his door. He ignored it, knowing whoever outside will eventually gives up and leave, thinking that nobody was inside. Unfortunately for him, the frantic knocked continue. Worried that his neighbor will get annoyed by the loud banging, he slowly got up and went to open the door. When he open the door, he was shocked to see Jin standing outside the door.
“Jin…” His sentence was cut short when Jin suddenly grabs his shoulders.
“ Kame, are you okay. Did you lose weight because of me. What have I done? You…” Jin wasn’t able to finish his word. His body was trembling. Kame looks at Jin. He was lost for words. His mind was full of question, but he wasn’t able to voice out.
“Kame, I’m sorry. I…I only thought about myself. All this time…you’re the one who’s been hurting. Sorry. I’m so sorry Kame.” Jin closes his eyes, trying to prvent his tears from leaking out. His holds on Kame’s arms tighten. “But I can’t lose you Kame. I…I can’t imagine my life without you.” Jin kneeled. His hold on Kame still hasn’t loose. His shoulders shook a little.
After Jin had calm down, Kame brought Jin into his apartment. The sat on the floor side by side, leaning against the bed. They stay in silence but it was no an uncomfortable silence.
“Honestly…” Jin break the silence “a lot of thing had happened. I wasn’t able to sort thing out. I really don’t know what to do about us Kame.” He looked at kame.
“No. It’s okay. I’m not…I’m not asking for anything.” Kame said. “After all, this is my fault for misleading you” he added. Jin was left speechless. He hesitantly brought his hand up and clasped it with Kame. To say that Kame was shocked with Jin’s sudden action was an understatement. He looks at Jin with wide eyes.
“Don’t say that. I’m the one who do not understand anything.” He hides his face between his knees. “Please, just give me some time to think this through.”
“Sure Jin.” The there was silence since both of them were drown in their own thought.
The sudden splatter sound hitting the windows brought the back from their own world. Kame walks to the window to look outside. “It’s raining.” He said.
“Seems like I’m not going anywhere.” Jin too look at the window. Outside the rain was pouring heavily.
“Just stay for the night.” Kame said.
“Are you sure?” Jin asked.”I don’t want to bother you.” He added.
“Since when did you start to act like this? It’s not like you never stay over. For reminder, you always come here when you’re drunk. And it was the worst. You’re not only drunk, but you also kept rambling incoherent words. When you slept, you snore. Loudly I tell you.” Hearing what Kame said, Jin blush..
“I did not snore.”He protest albeit hesitantly. Seeing Jin’s reaction, Kame laughed loudly making Jin more embarrassed. He stared at Kame laughing his lungs out. Unconsciously, a small smile stretch on his lips.
Kame, after calming down from his laughter asked, “What”
“No..nothing.” Jin stammered. “I just remember the first time we met. I was taken aback by your smile. I just remember that…. out of the blue.” Jin explain. Kame stunned. His cheek suddenly felt hotter than usual.
“How about you. What is your first impression of me?” Jin asked quite eagerly.
“I already told you that.” He mumble. His cheek became redder. Jin look at Kame. His heart skip a bit and he wonder why.
“What with that expression.” Jin playfully nudge Kame’s head. And their playful bickering started until they realize that their faces were too close to each other. They stare into each others eyes without blinking. Their heart beat raising. No body knows and no body realize who was the one who took the initiative closing their gap, but as they realize it, both of their lips had met. Kame felt Jin’s tongue lick his bottom lip. He gasps in surprise and Jin takes the chance to enter his tongue into Kame’s mouth. As he felt Jin’s tongue in his mouth, Kame grip Jin’s shirt tightly. He close his eyes, letting Jin to dominate the kiss. Jin entangles his fingers in Kame’s hair. Jin explore Kame’s cavern, roaming his tongue to each nook and crook of Kame’s mouth. Tasting his sweet taste. The kiss come to an end after air was needed. They stared to each other as the gasp for breath. Silence surround them for the nth time.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. I shouldn’t do this until I sort things out.”Jin said quietly.
Kame grip Jin’s wrist as look down. “Even if you don’t love me, it’s okay. However, if you can, I want to do it with you.” Kame said quietly. His hand that was holding Jin’s wrist tremble. Jin was shocked. He look at Kame only to see a determine look in his eyes.
~~~
The next day, the rain was still pouring. Kame was ready to go for his lecture.
“So, you’re only going for the first lecture, right?” Jin asked.
“Yes. I’ll be home before lunchtime.” Kame answered. “You should take a nap.”
“Hey, can I…canI stay here until you get back?” Jin asked hesitantly.
“Sure.”Kame smiled. “I’ll get our bento on my way home then. I better get going.” He added as he looks at his watch.
~~~
Everything going to be alright. We’ll be together again like before. Jin didn’t say anything. May be he wants to forget and stay as friend. That’s okay too. After all, it is for.the best if he forget about me.
“Are you Maki’s boyfriend?” Kame’s muse was cut short when someone blocked his way.
“What?” Kame asked.
“I won’t allow it. You can’t monopolize her.” With that said, the man took steps forward.
Kame didn’t know what had happened. And when he realizes it, he was lying down on the road. There was pain coming from his stomach. He coughs and felt something trickle down his chin. His eyes was looking straight to the sky, watching the rain pouring down onto him.
What should I do Jin? He thought. He touched his stomach and saw blood as he raised up his hand.
I don’t understand why this is happening. Is this some kind of punishment? But, I’m glad. I finally overcome my pain and face my feeling for Jin. Now, I’m taking everything with me…
The memories,
My love for him
And this happiness will never be lost……
AN 2: Comments are love…^
^