My Very First Post
Well, I''m not exactly sure what to put down here, but I suppose I could talk about my day, today. It was kind of average, because I didn't really do anything exciting, and nothing really exciting happened. I got up this morning, went to work, came home a messed around on my computer. Now, here I sit, a brand new member of LJ, not sure of what I'm going to write, but I'm sure to write something. It seems I always feel like writing something, I just don't always know what I want to to write.
I used to hate the idea of having a blog, because I would like to actually write in it as though it were a journal, but I'd be afraid that my friends or family would read it and be like, "I didn't do that!" or "That's a rude thing to say about that person!". But now, I'm just, like, "Whatever, if I'm writing something in here that makes another person look bad, it's because that is the side of them they were showing me at the time." These journals aren't unilateral progressive omniscient novels, they're merely the one-sided experiences of a person. If I were to type, say, "My brother is a complete idiot." he would likely get frustrated with me, for having written something like that where people can see. However, the point would be that I think he's an idiot at that moment, other times I may think he's a genius. Another fear I had of writing in such a place where my friends can see, is that I tend to be a very "closed-book" kind of person with my feelings. Especially those of a romantic nature. So if I were to write about my thoughts and feelings, concerning my relationship desires, I would feel very exposed to my friends, like I no longer had any secrets. (Yes, I keep secrets from everyone, especially the people close to me, and it's a critical psychological respite for myself.) The way I've reasoned my way out of this, is: perhaps I should share some of my feelings with my friends... however, the fear remains, that, if I were to share my feelings, I would end up losing my chances with the girls I like because my blatant feelings would scare them off. Meh, whatever...
That's something I could share with you people: a brief history on my love life (or, rahter, the lack thereof). I have never had a "girlfriend", as a matter of fact, I've never been kissed. Heck, I'm probably lucky I've ever been hugged by someone I'm not related to. This, I don't really understand. I've tried darn near every approach there is, none of them have worked. Bleh, I don't really have the focus right now to finish this paragraph's thought. Maybe later.
I'm feeling kind of tired right now, so I'll update again, soon.
I used to hate the idea of having a blog, because I would like to actually write in it as though it were a journal, but I'd be afraid that my friends or family would read it and be like, "I didn't do that!" or "That's a rude thing to say about that person!". But now, I'm just, like, "Whatever, if I'm writing something in here that makes another person look bad, it's because that is the side of them they were showing me at the time." These journals aren't unilateral progressive omniscient novels, they're merely the one-sided experiences of a person. If I were to type, say, "My brother is a complete idiot." he would likely get frustrated with me, for having written something like that where people can see. However, the point would be that I think he's an idiot at that moment, other times I may think he's a genius. Another fear I had of writing in such a place where my friends can see, is that I tend to be a very "closed-book" kind of person with my feelings. Especially those of a romantic nature. So if I were to write about my thoughts and feelings, concerning my relationship desires, I would feel very exposed to my friends, like I no longer had any secrets. (Yes, I keep secrets from everyone, especially the people close to me, and it's a critical psychological respite for myself.) The way I've reasoned my way out of this, is: perhaps I should share some of my feelings with my friends... however, the fear remains, that, if I were to share my feelings, I would end up losing my chances with the girls I like because my blatant feelings would scare them off. Meh, whatever...
That's something I could share with you people: a brief history on my love life (or, rahter, the lack thereof). I have never had a "girlfriend", as a matter of fact, I've never been kissed. Heck, I'm probably lucky I've ever been hugged by someone I'm not related to. This, I don't really understand. I've tried darn near every approach there is, none of them have worked. Bleh, I don't really have the focus right now to finish this paragraph's thought. Maybe later.
I'm feeling kind of tired right now, so I'll update again, soon.