My Favorite Year
From "Funny/The Duck Joke":
Alice: The only completely unfunny people in the world are professional accordian players.
KC: And me.
Alice: You're funny!
KC: When have I been funny?
(pause)
Alice: Well, I'm sure you could be funny.
KC: How?
Alice: You could tell a joke! Yes, of course you can, anyone can tell a joke! I'm gonna teach you. I'm gonna tell you a joke, and then you're gonna tell it back to me. OK?
KC: OK.
Alice: Ok, here's the joke. This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office with a duck on his head. The psychiatrist says, "Can I help you?" The duck says, "Yeah, get this guy off my ass."
(pause)
KC: The duck talks?
Alice: Hm?...Yeah, yeah, the duck talks.
(pause)
KC: A talking duck?
Alice: Uh-huh. A talking duck. AL-right now, you tell it back to me.
KC: A man-
Alice: Hold it...."This guy" is better than a man. Ok? And you're doing fine. Go ahead.
KC: This guy walks into a doctor's office-
Alice: Psychiatrist's-
KC: Right, sorry, I got it: This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office, wearing a duck-
Alice: WHOA! WEARING a duck?? No, he's got a duck on his head.
KC: I told you!
Alice: I threw you off. Go ahead.
KC: This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office with a duck on his head; the guy says to the psychiatrist, "Can you help me? I have a talking duck on my head!"
(LONG pause)
Alice: Oh...oh, yeah!...
KC: Yeah?
Alice: ...Yeah...(nervous laughter, then crying; hands KC slip of paper)
KC: What's this for?
Alice: ACCORDIAN LESSONS.
Alice: The only completely unfunny people in the world are professional accordian players.
KC: And me.
Alice: You're funny!
KC: When have I been funny?
(pause)
Alice: Well, I'm sure you could be funny.
KC: How?
Alice: You could tell a joke! Yes, of course you can, anyone can tell a joke! I'm gonna teach you. I'm gonna tell you a joke, and then you're gonna tell it back to me. OK?
KC: OK.
Alice: Ok, here's the joke. This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office with a duck on his head. The psychiatrist says, "Can I help you?" The duck says, "Yeah, get this guy off my ass."
(pause)
KC: The duck talks?
Alice: Hm?...Yeah, yeah, the duck talks.
(pause)
KC: A talking duck?
Alice: Uh-huh. A talking duck. AL-right now, you tell it back to me.
KC: A man-
Alice: Hold it...."This guy" is better than a man. Ok? And you're doing fine. Go ahead.
KC: This guy walks into a doctor's office-
Alice: Psychiatrist's-
KC: Right, sorry, I got it: This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office, wearing a duck-
Alice: WHOA! WEARING a duck?? No, he's got a duck on his head.
KC: I told you!
Alice: I threw you off. Go ahead.
KC: This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office with a duck on his head; the guy says to the psychiatrist, "Can you help me? I have a talking duck on my head!"
(LONG pause)
Alice: Oh...oh, yeah!...
KC: Yeah?
Alice: ...Yeah...(nervous laughter, then crying; hands KC slip of paper)
KC: What's this for?
Alice: ACCORDIAN LESSONS.