News Report, January 5, 2008
Woman throws birthday party for cat; denies being crazy cat lady.
Willow Arborvitae was derailed again in her attempts to convince the public that she is not a crazy cat lady.
This morning reports surfaced that Ms. Arborvitae had thrown a birthday party for her cat, Munchkin. From pictures (shown below), it appears that the party included flowers, balloons, new toys, catnip, fancy feast, and milk.
When questioned, Ms. Arborvitae stated, "I am not a crazy cat lady! Yes, I have two large cat structures in my apartment and I just threw a birthday party for my cat, but... well... um... I'm just not, OK?"
Added Arborvitae, "And, I had sex recently! Everyone knows that crazy cat ladies aren't sexually active." When questioned if her recent sexual encounter was with a human or a cat, Ms. Arborvitae stated, "Well, there was some scratching and biting involved, but I'm pretty sure that it was with a human and not a cat. I think... Ummm... but, how are cats and humans different?"
At this point, Ms. Arborvitae began shrieking and throwing stuffed cats at the reporters, then fled into her apartment.
Photos from the birthday party:
Willow Arborvitae was derailed again in her attempts to convince the public that she is not a crazy cat lady.
This morning reports surfaced that Ms. Arborvitae had thrown a birthday party for her cat, Munchkin. From pictures (shown below), it appears that the party included flowers, balloons, new toys, catnip, fancy feast, and milk.
When questioned, Ms. Arborvitae stated, "I am not a crazy cat lady! Yes, I have two large cat structures in my apartment and I just threw a birthday party for my cat, but... well... um... I'm just not, OK?"
Added Arborvitae, "And, I had sex recently! Everyone knows that crazy cat ladies aren't sexually active." When questioned if her recent sexual encounter was with a human or a cat, Ms. Arborvitae stated, "Well, there was some scratching and biting involved, but I'm pretty sure that it was with a human and not a cat. I think... Ummm... but, how are cats and humans different?"
At this point, Ms. Arborvitae began shrieking and throwing stuffed cats at the reporters, then fled into her apartment.
Photos from the birthday party:
