fic: brave new world
Title: Brave New World
Fandom: Stargate: Atlantis
Pairing: Weir/Sheppard, friendship, slight UST
Notes: written for dragonsinger's birthday!
Summary: Home just doesn't hold a candle to this.
Elizabeth Weir sat cross-legged on one of the balconies, looking out at the endless expanse of water. Funny, but while the outside of the facility looked more alien to her than anything inside - mostly, it was the ever changing colors of the sky, as if they were perpetually experiencing the universe’s prettiest sunrise - out here, she felt more at home than anywhere else. Maybe it was the silence. Inside, there was always noise. Someone was trying to open a locked door, weld a machine back together, argue with someone else about proper procedure in a different galaxy. She was, of course, expected to mediate everything. She was good at it, and loved it, but sometimes … she just wanted to sit.
“Hey, I didn’t know you’d be out here.”
Elizabeth turned around. Sheppard stood in the doorway, hesitating. “That probably means you’re not coming to tell me I need to do something, right?”
“Nope, I was actually escaping doing things myself. McKay’s looking for guinea pigs for some Ancient device or another.”
“Then come on out.” Elizabeth gestured to the railing next to her. She expected him to lean over it, but instead, he sat down next to her. “I was thinking,” she mused, “we should possibly build some deck chairs.”
“I was thinking maybe a shuffleboard game.”
“Do you have any idea how to play shuffleboard?”
“No, but it’s not big enough for a football field.”
She laughed. “Maybe someday, Major.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes, both lost in the view ahead, swirling colors colliding with the sea’s horizon. Elizabeth thought for a moment about the man sitting next to her. John Sheppard was never quite what she expected him to be. Or, rather, he was everything she expected him to be, with a few of surprises thrown in. He was a cocky flyboy who’d seen Top Gun too many times, a fiercely loyal and competitive man, smarter than he pretended to be, and occasionally overwhelmed by their new situation. He tried to hide it, but she could see the fear every once in a while. Oddly, she appreciated the fear above all else.
When Elizabeth spoke again, her voice sounded small, almost lost in the air surrounding her. “I miss the oddest things.”
Sheppard inclined his head in her direction. “Like what?”
“White Castle hamburgers. My juniper scented hand lotion. Having arguments with Simon about my name.”
“Simon?”
Elizabeth’s heart seized, as she realized she hadn’t mentioned his name to anyone here yet. “My husband,” she murmured.
“Oh.” A beat. “I didn’t realize you were married.”
“Nearly three years. Only, can I count anniversaries now? I can’t quite figure.” Sheppard didn’t answer, so she rambled on. “Simon and I always had this stupid joke argument, because I can’t stand anyone to call me by a nickname. Liz, Beth, Eliza, whatever, I hate them all. Mostly because my grandfather used to call me Betsy when I was a kid. I made the mistake of telling Simon that story one time, and he started calling me Betsy just to get my goat. Eventually, even though I’d yell at him for it, I secretly loved it. It was … an endearment.” She looked sideways at Sheppard. “And, wow, was that probably sharing too much about myself.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Why would you say that?”
“I don’t know …”
Sheppard grinned. “See, when I was a kid, I was a little skinny thing. The boys down the block used to beat me up and call me ‘Baby J’. I hated them so much - heard their voices every time I thought I was going to die in boot camp. Once, I went home, and found that the biggest bully kid is now married with three kids, and works as some sort of computer geek. Felt like a victory for me.”
“Oh, of course, because being a computer geek is so very unmanly.”
“Hey!” He managed to contort his face into an approximation of hurt, but his eyes still twinkled. “I’m the hero of this story, remember? Skinny kid, bullied, turns into military stud?”
“Absolutely. I’m terribly sorry.” Her lips twitched, and she silently thanked him for the distraction. The last time she’d allowed herself to think of Simon, the previous night, she’d woken up with tears dried on her face.
He didn’t ask her about Simon, for which she was grateful. He wasn’t hers to share, not any more. She knew damned well that she was likely never returning home. In her lengthy goodbye video, at the very end, she’d told Simon about the key to the lockbox, hidden in her jewelry box. Inside, she’d placed the divorce papers, with her signature carefully place on every pertinent line. He shouldn’t have to wait for her, not forever. She wasn’t that selfish. Or, perhaps she was. After all, she’d chosen another galaxy over him. Sometimes, she wondered - if she’d loved him enough, would she have ever left?
The man sitting next to her had made a similar decision, and suddenly, she wondered what he’d left behind. A wife, a girlfriend, a lover? A family? Friends? What had he sacrificed when he stepped through that gate? “What do you miss?” she asked suddenly. “I mean, besides football,” she added quickly.
He chuckled. After a moment, he shrugged. “A lot of things, I guess. But, it’s funny - I can’t think of anything right now that I’d choose to go back for. I’m having too much fun.”
“Fun?”
“Yeah, fun.” He grinned. “I mean, the Wraith? Not fun. But, god, who would have ever though I’d get to pilot a ship through space and control alien technology with my mind? How cool is that?”
“I get that." She smiled back. "We all chose to be here, after all. We wouldn't have come if … well, if this didn't seem much cooler than anything else, right?"
Sheppard paused for a moment, then nodded. "Exactly."
A moment later, he launched into a story about flying planes in the Middle East, complete with exploding sound effects, and Elizabeth found herself laughing - no, giggling, like a fifteen year old girl, she thought. It was a sound she hadn't heard out of her own mouth in years. Not since … well, did Simon make her laugh like this? That thought, she found, felt a little disturbing, and she decided not to pursue it. Time enough to worry about the complicated things later.
Nostalgia had its place. But, sometimes, it was better to just stop and enjoy the wild new places - and people - this galaxy had given her.
Fandom: Stargate: Atlantis
Pairing: Weir/Sheppard, friendship, slight UST
Notes: written for dragonsinger's birthday!
Summary: Home just doesn't hold a candle to this.
Elizabeth Weir sat cross-legged on one of the balconies, looking out at the endless expanse of water. Funny, but while the outside of the facility looked more alien to her than anything inside - mostly, it was the ever changing colors of the sky, as if they were perpetually experiencing the universe’s prettiest sunrise - out here, she felt more at home than anywhere else. Maybe it was the silence. Inside, there was always noise. Someone was trying to open a locked door, weld a machine back together, argue with someone else about proper procedure in a different galaxy. She was, of course, expected to mediate everything. She was good at it, and loved it, but sometimes … she just wanted to sit.
“Hey, I didn’t know you’d be out here.”
Elizabeth turned around. Sheppard stood in the doorway, hesitating. “That probably means you’re not coming to tell me I need to do something, right?”
“Nope, I was actually escaping doing things myself. McKay’s looking for guinea pigs for some Ancient device or another.”
“Then come on out.” Elizabeth gestured to the railing next to her. She expected him to lean over it, but instead, he sat down next to her. “I was thinking,” she mused, “we should possibly build some deck chairs.”
“I was thinking maybe a shuffleboard game.”
“Do you have any idea how to play shuffleboard?”
“No, but it’s not big enough for a football field.”
She laughed. “Maybe someday, Major.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes, both lost in the view ahead, swirling colors colliding with the sea’s horizon. Elizabeth thought for a moment about the man sitting next to her. John Sheppard was never quite what she expected him to be. Or, rather, he was everything she expected him to be, with a few of surprises thrown in. He was a cocky flyboy who’d seen Top Gun too many times, a fiercely loyal and competitive man, smarter than he pretended to be, and occasionally overwhelmed by their new situation. He tried to hide it, but she could see the fear every once in a while. Oddly, she appreciated the fear above all else.
When Elizabeth spoke again, her voice sounded small, almost lost in the air surrounding her. “I miss the oddest things.”
Sheppard inclined his head in her direction. “Like what?”
“White Castle hamburgers. My juniper scented hand lotion. Having arguments with Simon about my name.”
“Simon?”
Elizabeth’s heart seized, as she realized she hadn’t mentioned his name to anyone here yet. “My husband,” she murmured.
“Oh.” A beat. “I didn’t realize you were married.”
“Nearly three years. Only, can I count anniversaries now? I can’t quite figure.” Sheppard didn’t answer, so she rambled on. “Simon and I always had this stupid joke argument, because I can’t stand anyone to call me by a nickname. Liz, Beth, Eliza, whatever, I hate them all. Mostly because my grandfather used to call me Betsy when I was a kid. I made the mistake of telling Simon that story one time, and he started calling me Betsy just to get my goat. Eventually, even though I’d yell at him for it, I secretly loved it. It was … an endearment.” She looked sideways at Sheppard. “And, wow, was that probably sharing too much about myself.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Why would you say that?”
“I don’t know …”
Sheppard grinned. “See, when I was a kid, I was a little skinny thing. The boys down the block used to beat me up and call me ‘Baby J’. I hated them so much - heard their voices every time I thought I was going to die in boot camp. Once, I went home, and found that the biggest bully kid is now married with three kids, and works as some sort of computer geek. Felt like a victory for me.”
“Oh, of course, because being a computer geek is so very unmanly.”
“Hey!” He managed to contort his face into an approximation of hurt, but his eyes still twinkled. “I’m the hero of this story, remember? Skinny kid, bullied, turns into military stud?”
“Absolutely. I’m terribly sorry.” Her lips twitched, and she silently thanked him for the distraction. The last time she’d allowed herself to think of Simon, the previous night, she’d woken up with tears dried on her face.
He didn’t ask her about Simon, for which she was grateful. He wasn’t hers to share, not any more. She knew damned well that she was likely never returning home. In her lengthy goodbye video, at the very end, she’d told Simon about the key to the lockbox, hidden in her jewelry box. Inside, she’d placed the divorce papers, with her signature carefully place on every pertinent line. He shouldn’t have to wait for her, not forever. She wasn’t that selfish. Or, perhaps she was. After all, she’d chosen another galaxy over him. Sometimes, she wondered - if she’d loved him enough, would she have ever left?
The man sitting next to her had made a similar decision, and suddenly, she wondered what he’d left behind. A wife, a girlfriend, a lover? A family? Friends? What had he sacrificed when he stepped through that gate? “What do you miss?” she asked suddenly. “I mean, besides football,” she added quickly.
He chuckled. After a moment, he shrugged. “A lot of things, I guess. But, it’s funny - I can’t think of anything right now that I’d choose to go back for. I’m having too much fun.”
“Fun?”
“Yeah, fun.” He grinned. “I mean, the Wraith? Not fun. But, god, who would have ever though I’d get to pilot a ship through space and control alien technology with my mind? How cool is that?”
“I get that." She smiled back. "We all chose to be here, after all. We wouldn't have come if … well, if this didn't seem much cooler than anything else, right?"
Sheppard paused for a moment, then nodded. "Exactly."
A moment later, he launched into a story about flying planes in the Middle East, complete with exploding sound effects, and Elizabeth found herself laughing - no, giggling, like a fifteen year old girl, she thought. It was a sound she hadn't heard out of her own mouth in years. Not since … well, did Simon make her laugh like this? That thought, she found, felt a little disturbing, and she decided not to pursue it. Time enough to worry about the complicated things later.
Nostalgia had its place. But, sometimes, it was better to just stop and enjoy the wild new places - and people - this galaxy had given her.